Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Getchyer Tuesday On!

Getchyer Tuesday Attitude on, Big People!
Hiya, Friends!  Boy howdy, didja know that it's Tuesday?  AND the end of the month, too boot? 

You know, I have never been shy about expressing just how ho-hum Tuesdays can be, and that's why I wanna see everybody puttin' a little sass in their Tuesday attitudes!  There's no sense of spending one-seventh of your life all ho-hum!

How do ya put some extra attitude in your Tuesday?  I can't tell ya what to do, but I can letchya know what I do.  First thing I do is choose and put on a brightly-colored outfit.  Animal prints are a bonus! 

After that, make sure your hair's in a Seriously Fun hairstyle.  The bigger the better, I always say! 

Finally, the part that takes a little practice is strikin' a pose that says "Bring it on, Tuesday!"  It might take ya a couple-three tries to get your pose strucken so it knows it's strucken, but I'll tell ya what, Friends, it's so worth it when ya get it right.  It just makes Tuesday snap into line, just like that. 

The same can be said for pretty much anything, Friends.  Come at it with the right attitude, and everything just falls into place.  Even, and especially, Tuesday!

Hey, Big People!  I love ya lots!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, June 29, 2015

Over Too Soon, June!

Do ya think they'd let me buy lotsa fireworks with this face?
Well, hiya, again, Big People! 

Goodness, I can't believe how fast the Month of June went.  Can you?  Seems like we just got here.  Of course, the recent turn toward winter over the weekend kind of mixed me up even more.  I hope today's warmer.

Well, even if it isn't, I'll make the best of it.  I have my soft blankets on the couch.  If it isn't warmer today, I'll just wrap up in those soft blankets.  Watch a little Sesame Street... It'll all be good.

June is over far too soon, Friends, but I know that just puts me a little closer to going to the Lake.  I love visiting the Lake.  I look forward to it All Year.

But.  I don't wanna rush the Summer along so fast, either.  Maybe since July has an extra day in it, it'll take a little longer to complete itself, from start to finish.

Hey, Friends.  I'll see ya tomorrow.  I sure love ya lots.  I just wanna go and make sure my Soft Blankets are all washed up and smellin' nice and ready to keep me warm today, in case I need.  Muah!

Sunday, June 28, 2015

I Don't Know- Whadda YOU Wanna Do?

I'll tell ya what I wanna do- just lounge right here, all day!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Sunday to you!

Hey.  Have you ever had one of those Sundays where you feel like you oughtta be doin' something, but you can't talk yourself up into actually doing anything?

That's me, today. 

I've been sittin' here with my pal Sabretooth for a little while, and we've been trying to figure out what we wanna do today.  Neither of us has any real strong feelings about what to do, but I'll tell ya what I don't wanna do... I don't wanna clean my room or anything like that.  Cleanin' my room is a very un-Sunday-like thing to do.  But I guess that wasn't even one of the choices, so it's all good. 

Honestly, you know what I really wanna do today, Friends?  I wanna just lounge around.  Maybe watch some of my favorite shows on the television.  It seems like a good day for that sort of thing today.

So that's what the plan is, I suppose.  You know what?  I hope you have a plan for today that's as good as mine.  I sure do love ya lots, Big People, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Chill Pickles

Oh, you know... just hangin' around like this, in case the sky's fallin'!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Sunday to you!

You know, Big People?  You sure do get all worked up over the silliest things.  And you say we Toddlers and Little Kids are notorious for that.  You're just as bad as we are, but it's just that you're worrying about Other Things.

You know what my Mommy says to me, when I get all good and spooled the heck up?  She tells me to go eat a chill pickle.  Huh.

Well, she gets spooled up about stuff, too.  Oh, sure she does.  I hate to say it, but where do you think I get it from?  And when she does, I tell HER to eat a chill pickle or two!


Anyway, Friends.  Sometimes it gets to feelin' like the sky is fallin' between all the Little Kid chill pickle issues, and all the Big People chill pickle issues.  And the best thing to do is put a bucket-hat on your head and hunker down and just ride it the heck out.  That's all you can do sometimes, Friends!

Hey.  I love ya lots.  If you need a chill pickle, go get one, by golly!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, June 26, 2015

Why I Oughtta...

I don't even know why I'm mad, but I'm MAD!
Boyo boy, good as heck thing it's Friday.  I'll tell ya what, Friends. 

I'm mad, and I'm not even sure what about, you know?  Do I even NEED a reason?

I s'pose if you were gonna press me for a reason why I'm so put-out, it's because I'm three and three-quarters now.  I'm practically all grown-up, but Mommy still treats me like I'm still a Little Kid or something. 

It's true.  She tells me when and what I can eat.  She's constantly all up in my face about 'Zoe, do you hafta go to the potty?' and 'Zoe, didja go to the potty recently?'  I'd like to give her the same ol' treatment, but then I'm bein' "disrespectful."

Oh, and another thing.  Whenever we go anywheres, Mommy always drives.  Never even asks me if I'd maybe like to take a turn behind the wheel.  She makes me sit all strapped in to my carseat and tries to make me feel better about it by pointing out the five-point safety harness.

"It's like the race car drivers wear!" she says.

Well, no amount of points in a safety harness on a carseat can make it cool, Friends.  You know why?  Because race car drivers also get steering wheels and shifters and clutch, brake, and accelerator pedals, that's why.  What do I get in my car seat?  What?!

I get a lame-o duster that I keep in the car to keep myself entertained, since Mommy's a wheel-hog.  Big whoop.

And don't get me started on the television or snacks.  The way I get pushed around, you'd think I don't have an opinion on anything.

Friends, the Three Year-Old struggle is real.  That's all the more I"m gonna say about this, mmmkay?  I'll see ya tomorrow.  I'm so mad, I can hardly 'Muah!'

Thursday, June 25, 2015

The Gift of Laughter

It's truly a gift to be able to make people laugh!
Hiya, Friends!  Well, it's the Twenty-Fifth. 

Since I had some grumpage after yesterday's post, I'm not allowed to remind ya of what's coming up in six months from now.  So I won't. 

This kid isn't gonna go back to Blogger Time-Out.

Anyways, I won't talk about what's coming up in six months, but I WILL talk about what a GIFT it is when ya can make someone laugh.  Or, even what a PRESENT it is to be able to laugh, you know, Friends?

I usedta get all skinny around the nose when Big People would laugh at me, but then Mommy explained to me that they weren't really laughing at me.  Or even laughing at me.  You know what I'm saying, Friends? 

She said that what they're laughing at are the things I say and the things I do, or the way I say or do 'em.  She said they aren't bein' mean.  If they were bein' mean to me, she'd let 'em have it.  But instead, she says, people just get a kick out of what I say and what I do.  I countered that I don't even TRY to make people laugh- I just do what I do!  And that's when Mommy said that it's a gift to be able to make people laugh like that.

I got to thinking about that, Friends.  And what I decided was to become a Doctor of Humorous Healing.  Laughter IS the best medicine, and it makes a pretty darned good present, too.  Maybe not a present for the big holiday that is only six shopping months from to-day, but it's a great thing to give a friend or complete stranger, just any time of the year.  Laughin' is like a calorie-free cupcake.  And laughin's free.

Unless you come to St. Laffalotatus- Mercy-Mercy Hospital for a Spirit Lift.  That'll cost ya, but you can talk about that with Billing.  I don't handle that aspect of Humorous Healing. 

Anyway, I love ya lots, Friends!  Laugh lots today.  Make somebody else laugh.  It's the best present you can give yourself and others.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Big Reminder 6!

You have six months, Friends.  You know what I'm talkin' about!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Wednesday!

Well, I know this bugs the daylights outta you when I do this, but I'm contractually obligated to remind you that you're down to just six shopping months before you-know-what.  Do ya need me to spell it out for ya, 'cause I will! ... No?  Splendid.

What's that? ... Oh, the contract that I'm obligated to is with me.  But I will not break that contract.  Nosiree.  If ya can't trust yourself to keep a contract with you, then who can you really count on, Friends?!  Think about it! 

So that's why I'm gonna keep my promise to me and use every twenty-fourth and twenty-fifth of the month, just what day it is, and how many more twenty-fourths and twenty-fifths there are until the day I look forward to, all year long. 

It's really for you, Friends.  I don't wantchya to be caught unawares when that magical Eve and Day turn up.  I don't wantchya scramblin' to buy presents at some roadside convenience store, 'cause you forgot how many shoppin' months you had.  I just wantchya to be prepared, is all!

Awwww, heck, Friends.  I know you're mad at me, but I love ya just the same.  I sure do!  And I'll see ya tomorrow.  On the twenty-fifth.  Muah!

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Looks Like We Made It!

It's so good to see ya!  Come here and gimme a HUG!
Friends!  Hiya!  Happy Tuesday to you!  I TOLD you we'd make it, didn't I?!

Boyo boy, yesterday was a doozy of a Monday.  It was such a doozy I don't even wanna go into all the details of it, but rest assured, this kid definitely feels like she earned Tuesday. 

It wasn't all bad, though.  When Daddy came home, we got to watch "Lady and the Tramp."  I love that movie.  My best pal Rozzie loves that movie. 

What I'm really hopin' is that we can make Mondays "Movie Mondays" in my house.  That'd give us something to look forward to Mondays for.  Maybe make it less of a drag to return to the everyday grind.

Friends, that's what we've gotta do.  We can't get rid of Mondays, outright, but we can find things to do to make 'em more palatable.  We can do it, Friends!  You bet we can!

Just, let's go out there and have a terrific Tuesday, mmmmmmkay?  Tuesdays are EASY!  I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, June 22, 2015

Careful, Friends! It's Monday!

Oh, snap!  It's Monday, isn't it?
Hiya, Friends! 

Well, don'tchya know I came strollin' full-steam ahead into this day, when all of a sudden I realized a terrible fact that made me stop in my tracks, shudder, and then scream like a great big man seeing a spider on the washing machine and then screaming like a little girl.

Not this little girl.  I'm not afraid of bugs.  But some people are, and that's who I screamed like, when I realized that today's...


Oh, my goodness, it's Monday, Friends, so we've all gotta be really careful.  We've got to tread lightly.  One false move will send us right through the floor, and we won't get recovered until well into Tuesday, maybe even Wednesday.

We can do this, Big People.  It's only one little day.  Deep breaths.  Brace ourselves.  We're in control.  Careful, careful control.  It's only Monday.  It's only Monday.  It's only Monday.

It isn't a pessimistic saying, Friends.  It's our mantra to get us through the day.  It isn't a flesh-eating bacteria we're dealing with.  It isn't a giant carnivorous dinosaur zombie, running rabid through the streets.  It's only Monday.  We can deal with Monday.  Together.

I love ya lots, Friends!  I love ya, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Me and My Daddo! (Happy Father's Day!)

My Daddy is the Apple of my Eye!
Friends, it's a special day, so I'd like to keep this short-n-sweet.

It's Father's Day.  I love Father's Day, because I love my Daddy a whole big globba love.  Any day I get to spend a lotta time with my Daddy is the BEST DAY EVER!

So.  Happy Father's Day, Daddo!  

Friends, I'll be back tomorrow, but today, Daddy and I have some serious playin' to do!  Muah!

Saturday, June 20, 2015

Tech Support Crunch

This is gonna be a while, Friends.  You might wanna go have breakfast and lunch.
Oh, Friends, have you ever really boogered something up, technologically-speaking, and then had to wanna hafta call and talk to Tech Support to figure out how to fix it together?  Has that ever happened to you?  It's happened to me.

More times than I'd like to admit, actually.

What really gets me is that you hafta go on hold all the time.  Please hold.  I'm gonna hafta putchya on hold.  Would you mind if I putchya on hold while I look this up?

It's holding madness, Friends!  Pure and utter madness!

All that holding takes up a lotta time.  But that's nothing, compared to all the time ya waste when ya hafta explain what the problem is and how it occurred to every new person you held the line for.  What were they doin' all that time you were on the hold?  Don't they talk to each other?

And then, after you've been on hold, and explained your life story yet again... darned if you aren't put on hold for transfer all over again!

Callin' Tech Support is kinda Kafka-esque, isn't it, Friends?  And not in the fun Metamorphosis way, if that can even be called fun.

Anyway, Big People.  I love ya lots.  Try to be nice to the Tech Support people, even if you would like to squish their little heads.  We're all in this together.  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, June 19, 2015

Weekly Warriors!

We are the Weekly Warriors!
Hiya, Friends! 

Welp, it looks like we made it to another Friday!  That's sayin' something! 

Not that this week was overly difficult to deal with.  In fact, it was a pretty darned GOOD week, if ya ask me.  It's just that makin' it to Friday always feels like such an accomplishment, doesn't it?  Makin' it to Friday makes me feel like...

A Weekly Warrior!  That's what!

Maybe that's why we all like Fridays so much.  Because we kept on keepin' on all week.  We got up and did the whole grind thing.  We dragged ourselves home after a long and busy day, four days in a row.

And then we woke up this morning to find ourselves back at Friday.  Of course, there'll be keepin' on to keep on doing today.  There'll be that whole daily grind thing. 

But tonight when we drag ourselves home, we won't be draggin', because it's FRIDAY!  And Fridays just automatically put a spring in your step.

Hey, I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, mmmkay?!  Muah!

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Livin' La Vida Zoe-B!

To truly live the Zoe-B life, you gotta be willing to dance and dance and dance!
Hiya, Friends!

I know I harp a lot on dancin' on this blog, but it really is an important thing that makes me Me. 

I dance when I'm happy, because I just can't help but get up and move when I'm happy!  I dance when I'm mad, because that works all that energy out.  I dance when I'm feelin' down, because it lifts me up.  I dance when I'm nervous for the same reason. 

I even dance when I hafta go to the potty, because... well, who DOESN'T dance when they hafta go to the potty?!  It's just a Good Thing To Do.  Especially if ya can manage to run to the potty AND dance.

So you see, in order to live La Vida Zoe-B, you've gotta be willing to embrace the whole dance of Life.  That's all there is to it, Friends!  Make up your own dance!  Live your own Vida!

I love the heck right outta ya, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  Until then, Dance!  Muah!

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Stop! It's Hammer-Time!

Stop!  You can tell I'm serious by the way I'm standing!
Friends! Have you ever noticed that there's a lot of musics out there with the word "Stop!" in 'em?  It's true.  And I find this really ironic, because nearly all of the "Stop!" songs just make me wanna get up and go, go, go!

Don't believe me?  Get out your music collection and listen to these songs and tell me if I'm not right:

"Stop in the Name of Love" by the Supremes

"Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough" by Michael Jackson

"Stop! Stop! Stop!" by the Hollies

"I Can't Stop Dancin'" by Archie Bell and the Drells

"Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey

"Nothin's Gonna Stop Us Now" by Jefferson Airplane Starship

"Stop" by the Spice Girls

"Please Don't Stop the Music" by Rihanna

Then, of course you have these songs in which "Stop" features prominently in the lyrics of the song:

"Keep It Comin' Love!" by KC and the Sunshine Band

"Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice

"U Can't Touch This" by MC Hammer

"Don't Come Around Here No More" by Tom Petty

"Rubber-neckin'" by Elvis Presley

That oughtta give you a good playlist to get started with today, Friends, and if you're anything like me, you'll notice that "Stop!" is a really funny-looking word if you see it and say it enough!

Well, Friends, I have some big stuff to do, and I'm sure you do, too, so I'm gonna letchya go, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya LOTS!  Muah!

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Starfruit!

I don't know about this.  I do not know about this!
Hiya, Friends!

Hey, have you ever tried carambola?  Another name it goes by is starfruit.  It's a tropical fruit that you an get at Wegmans. 

In the produce bin, it just looks like a weird yellow fruit.  when ya wash it and slice it crossways, it looks like stars.  That's where it gets the name 'starfruit.'  You don't hafta peel it at all.  The skin is kind of easy to eat.

It looks pretty.  I'll give starfruit that much.

But the taste.  I don't know, Friends.  I'm not sold on the way on the taste.  It reminded me a little bit of a giant yella star-shaped grape, texture wise.  That's exactly what it's like in texture. 

Flavor-wise, I don't know even what to tell ya.  Something like a pear and kiwifruit, but kind of watery in flavor.  Not so much in texture.  The texture is still like that of a grape that's big enough to slice up and eat like that.  But with proportionally thicker skin.

Another disappointment is that starfruit doens't make ya twinkle like a star or give you any other superpowers besides bein' able to say you've eaten a starfruit, and when ya come right down to it, that's a pretty lame superpower.

Yeah, I don't know what to tell ya about starfruit, Friends.  I guess it's okay.  It isn't awful.  I wouldn't buy it again, but maybe if I was at someone else's house, and they had some starfruit and offered me some, and told me not to be shy about eatin' it, because they need to eat it up, or they need the space in their fridge, or what have you, I'd say, 'sure, pass me a slice'a' that dang ol' starfruit.  I'll help ya out.'

I'd say that, but there'd need to be either a bit of arm-twisting or maybe another reward like a big Hershey bar after I ate the starfruit, or a trip to a nice mall sometime.

Starfruits aren't for me, Friends.  At least not right now.

But seein' you every day IS for me!  And I'm sure glad you have me along for your ride.  I'll be seein ya tomorrow!  Love ya lots!  Muah!

Monday, June 15, 2015

Well How About That?!

Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle's niece!  
Friends, sometimes people tell me the most incredible things, and I am at a loss for what to say in response. 

You know how it is.  Somebody pulls a quarter out from behind your ear, and that's MAGIC, right there, so what do you do?  What do you say?  "Thank you?"  Hardly seems appropriate, and that's unusual, because I think it's most of the time appropriate to say "Thank you."  You could say "Whoa!" I suppose.  But you wouldn't want your magician friend to mistakenly think you've mistaken them for a horse, or they won't be so inclined to pull quarters out from behind your ears then, and that could really cut into your walkin' around money if you're Threena Half.

Also, when a Big Person takes your nose, they seem to be wantin' to get a rise outta ya.  Maybe they wantchya to say "Give me my nose back!"  or "What'd ya do that for?!"  I've never risen to this particular bait, Friends.  I've had my nose taken so many times, you'd think I'd just have a spot on the middle of my face that says "Zoe's nose usedta be here," but in fact, I sure don't!  I seem to still have my nose, at least as evidenced by the fact that I can still smell something delicious from a ZIP code away.  Maybe my nose just has extreme regenerative powers.  I'm guessing not, though.  Something's fishy here, with this gotchyer nose bit.

But what DO I say in times suchas these?  What can a little kid say to convey shock and awe, without putting emotions into it? 

"Well, how about that?!"  Is my go-to, Friends.  The way you say it changes the meaning.  It's the pashmina shawl of expressions.  Versatile, classic, suits a variety of different sizes and ages and such.  everybody can use it.

Another rising favorite of mine, that's trending with me right now, is "I'll be a monkey's uncle's niece."  But whenever I say it, I get a nearly uncontrollable hankering for bananas and banana products.  Not sure what's up with that!

I might not always know what the right thing to say at the right time is, Friends, but I do know I just love ya to pieces.  You're good people.  And I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  Muah!

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Some Sunny Sunday!

Dancing rejuvenates me, Friends!  How 'boutchyoo?
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Sunday to you!

I hope you're taking a little time today to relax and recharge yourself. 

You know, it doesn't matter to me, what you do to get yourself recharged on Sundays.  You could go jogging, or cook something delicious, or maybe build something in a workshop.  Why, if you relax when you clean stuff, I suppose you could clean.  Go out to your garden.  Mow the lawn. 

Whatever it is, it shouldn't feel like drudgery today.  It should feel like fun and make your soul sing.

As for me, I love to dance.  Dancing makes my soul sing, and it makes me feel all nicey relaxed, recharged, and rejuvenated.  It really does.  So that's what I'm doing with my Sunday, Friends!  I'm dancin'. 

I hope you have a wonderful Sunday, Big People.  I love the dickens right outta ya.  I'll see ya tomorrow, for Monday.  But today, I wantchya thinkin' about just havin' a nice Sunday and not worry about anything else, mmmkay? 


Saturday, June 13, 2015

Saturday Specialday!

Mmmmm!  Soak up that Saturday goodness, Friends!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you! 

Well, ya know, I've had a pretty darned good week this week, but I still hafta say that when I woke up this morning and remembered it's Saturday, I got a little excited. 

Saturdays are really exciting, because Daddy's usually home.  He doesn't usually have any appointments to run to like he does on Fridays, and he isn't fixin' people's teeth like he does on Monday through Thursday.  And Monday isn't tomorrow like it is when it's Sunday.

So Saturdays are just pretty darn great!

I don't think I'd want it to be Saturday every day, though, Friends.  I think what I really love about Saturdays is that they're special, unlike any other day of the week.  If every day was Saturday, it'd be fun for a little while, but the specialness would wear off right quick. 

I guess the rest of the week is the price we hafta pay for how very special Saturdays are, Friends, and that's okay with me. 

But given that today's Saturday, and it's special, we really oughtta wanna hafta go out there and just soak up all that Saturday specialness, right? 


I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, and we can ketchup all about our Special Saturdays then, mmmkay?  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Friday, June 12, 2015

Bring Your Bunny to Work Day!

I wouldn't think to bring anybunny other than Abigail to work with me!
Hiya, Big People!  What day is it again? ... Friday?  Well, how about that?!  We've made it through another week!

Hey.  It's National Bring Your Bunny to Work Day, so I brought my long-eared pink pal Abigail with me.  Abigail's a special friend who got me through a rough patch earlier in the spring, and I cannot thank her for that enough.  I just love this lagomorph!

So anyways, I'm at Donut Dude's World Headquarters today, doing my job as Director of Donut Development, so naturally Abigail got to come to one of my brainstorm sessions with my team.  She was BRILLIANT!  She developed two winning donuts on her first day!

Bein' a bunny, Abigail has a lotta knowledge about carrots, and she said they'd make a great donut.  She figured the most obvious choice for a carrot donut would be your simple glazed cake donut, but insteadda regular donut batter or blueberry donut batter, it'd be CARROT CAKE batter.  We sent it down to the test kitchen, they made up a batch, and BOOM!  They went into production thirty seconds after we tried 'em up in my conference room.

Oh, yeah.  I have my own conference room now at Donut Dudes.  I'm kind of a big deal here.  Plus, there's ALWAYS donuts in my conference room!

Anyways, the second winning donut Abigail developed today is a filled carrot cake donut with cream cheese filling and a powdered sugar outside.  It kinda took a little extra developing on that one, because you generally don't see much of a flavor for the donut part of a filled donut, except maybe chocolate sometimes.  So the recipe took a little tweaking.  And then we tried frosting the toppa the Cream Cheese Filled Carrot Cake Donut with cream cheese icing, and it was just too darn rich.  The powdered sugar was our second choice anyway, so it wasn't hard to call down to the production kitchen and tell 'em which way to jump, there. 

I'd say Abigail did really great on Bring Your Bunny to Work Day!  If you're thinking I might feel threatened that she's so brilliant and Donut Dude might notice and replace me with Abigail, that just isn't how I am.  But I DID hire Abigail to be part of my Donut Development Team.  I figure we really need a brilliant bunny mind on board here!  She has her own little bunny-sized desk now, and she's working up a way to tie in all the carrot cake goodness with a Li'l Dudes spinoff for both her new donut flavors.  Li'l Dudes are Donut Dude's version of Timbitz, Munchkins, or donut holes... except BETTER. 

How about that, Friends?!  I think that when ya think there's enough success to go around for everyone, it starts to come true! 

I love ya lots, Big People, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Enjoy your Friday!  I know I sure will!  Muah!

Thursday, June 11, 2015

Why Little Kids Have It So Tough

No-no!  I don't wanna take a nap yet!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Thursday to you!

Well, ya know, when you're a Little Kid, you don't really have a lot of control over your life. 

No, it's true.  While you Big People might like to think that Little Kids run things, we really don't.  Think about it.  We wanna use the car, you say no.  We want you to take us somewheres in the car, you say no.  We wanna go swimming at the Lake, you say no!

There's always some lame excuse that you Big People give us Little Kids, too.  Boyo boy, have I ever heard 'em all, too.  We can't use the car because supposedly ya hafta have a "license" to run those things.  Ya hafta be "tall enough" to reach the "pedals."  The Lake's closed, on accounta it's "winter."

I bet you're takin' offense to my liberal use of quotation marks, too.  You Big People think you know everything.

Whatever.  The stuff I mentioned before is just the little stuff.  It's serious stuff, too.  Like when I'm right in the middle of watchin' one of my stories, and Mommy says we've gotta go somewheres.  Or worse, she says it's naptime.  Or I'm at the Lake, tryin' to look all cool, ridin' around on a pontoon boat in the sunset, and Mommy and Daddy get it in their heads I need my cheeks kissed, and Aunt Colleen ought to take a picture of this indignity.  Boyo boy, Big People, that's just the worst, and if you don't believe me, I'll show ya a copy of our 2014 Christmas card.

Yeah,  those jerks made that picture into our Christmas card. 

See?  Little Kids have it really tough, Friends!  We do. 

But, despite my personal strife, I love ya lots, Friends.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  You bet I will!  Muah!

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Guess What?! I Feel Better!

So... Sorry about all that yesterday! I feel lots better, thanks!
Hiya, Friends! 

Didja dare come back and see me today after yesterday? 

I'm sure glad you're here. 

You see, yesterday, I was a little bit...  intense, let's say.  I counted to four and counted to four, and it wasn't makin' me any calmer, so what I did was really branch out.  I counted PAST four.  I counted to eight.  I counted to sixteen.  I counted to...


It didn't help me feel calmer immediately.  I had to count to twenty a whole big globba times, but I kept at it, and then I went to bed and got up, and here I am today, feelin' lots calmer and refreshed. 

Kind of like after it's been really hot and humid, and suddenly, we get a really big thunderstorm with big lightning and loud thunder, and torrential, downpouring rain, and when it's all over, it's like the whole world sighs and chills out for a little bit?

That's precisely how it worked with me, yesterday.  I was a thunderstorm, and today, I'm chill.

I'm glad you came back, too, Friends.  I was kinda worried that my torrential TigerBaby anger mighta alienated you.  I don't want that!

So, hey.  I'm gonna go.  My friend Sabretooth and I are gonna do some meditatin' today, and play some windchimes, and I'll be back tomorrow to see ya!  You be good and take care of yourself!  Muah!

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

I Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore [ANGER!!!]

...I've forgotten what I'm even shoutin' for!  But I'm gonna keep on anyway, because it feels good today!
Darn it, Friends!  It's Tuesday, and for some reason, this makes me really, really ANGRY!!! today!

Do you ever have those days, Big People?  Do you ever have days where you're just all kinds of mad, and you don't know why, but it feels so right to be mad that you just go with it?  That's how I'm feeling today. That's the head of steam that propels me forward on this dang ol' day.

I'm not usually one to be mad, just because of whatever day of the week it is.  In fact, I usually try to walk on the sunny side of life, but man-o-man, today... Today, it Just. Isn't. Workin'. Out!

There are a lotta words out there for people dealin' with feelings.  One of my favorite characters, Daniel Tiger, has a song for when you feel mad: "When ya FEEL so mad thatchya wanna ROAR!... Take a deep breath!  And count to Four!  1...2...3...4!"

And then you're supposed to feel calmer.

Well, that just isn't how any of this works today!  Today, I feel so mad that I wanna ROAR!  So I'm roaring!  And then I wanna roar some MORE!


I'll see ya tomorrow, Friends.  Maybe I'll be over bein' so mad.  I can't make promises, but I'm sure gonna try!  I love ya lots!  Muah!


Monday, June 8, 2015

The Far Unlit Unknown

Imagine my surprise when I found out I LIVE in the Far Unlit Unknown!
Friends, there's this song by Rush called "Subdivisions," and it really speaks to me.  I've been loving that song ever since the first time I heard it. 

At first, when I'd hear the song, I'd feel superior, because it mentions the Far Unlit Unknown, and I figured anybody that lives in the Far Unlit Unknown must be dreadfully provincial, why, would they ever have seen light-switches or flush-toilets?  I surely didn't think so!

Well then, Mommy started tellin' me about the city.  Then she told me that the song is talking about the suburbs, but not as a happy place... as a dreary place where everybody has to be the same and measure up to some kind of standard of cool, or they don't get to participate in suburban society out in the subdivisions.

Then she really dropped the bomb on me and told me that I actually live in the Far Unlit Unknown, where GPS can't find us, where there are no street signs and even fewer lampposts.  I was mortified at first.  MORTIFIED!

But then I got to thinkin' about it, and the Far Unlit Unknown isn't so bad, Friends.  We have a lot of room out here. Not only do we have light switches and flush toilets, but we have room to define our own sense of what's cool.  And if our definition doesn't match up with someone else's, there's room enough for everybody to have their own version of cool.

The city people and the subdivision people might be afraid of us and our way of life because they don't know how we live like we do, but we know it's actually pretty great out here in the Far Unlit Unknown.  Sure, we have to drive two hours in any direction to get anywhere of note or interest, but you know what?  That's all the more time I get to spend listening to good music in the car.  It's all part of the experience.

So Friends, don't tell the city people, but it isn't so bad out here in the Far Unlit Unknown. I like it. 

Hey.  I'll see ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sunday, June 7, 2015

I Call It a Z Party!

Don't be sassy at the dang ol' tea-party!
Hiya, Friends!  What better way to spend a Sunday than havin' a tea party with your very best friends?  There's no better way!  So I guess you know, I just invited you. 

It doesn't matter if you're dressed up or not.  I'm wearin' a dress and a tiara, but I always wear a tiara around the house.  Somebody's got to remind Mommy where on the food chain I rank, just in case she starts to gettin' ideas about sendin' me for a nap or cutting me off'n snacks or the television before I'm ready to be cut off.

Well, okay, the tiara does nothing to stop Mommy from doing those things, because I think she just has that much of a problem with authority.  Whatever.  She isn't invited to this tea party.  You are, so let's not ruin the day by talking about my Mommy.  Darn it!

Anyways, it isn't as important to me what you're wearing to my tea party, so long as we all get to observe good manners while we're together.  Manners are what make civil life possible, after all! 

Sometimes I get a good talkin' to about my manners.  Sometimes I like to interrupt Mommy and Daddy while they're talking.  They get really mad when I do that.  Well, darn it, Mommy and Daddy are really boring.  They never talk about anything exciting to me.  They never do!  That's why I interrupt them!  To infuse just a little bit of excitement into the conversation.  Seriously, I don't know what they did before I came along.  They must have just sat around, talking about boring stuff all day!

So one way to have good manners at my tea party is not to be boring.  Can you handle that, Friends?  Just don't be boring.

Let's see. Also, we should probably use our forks and spoons to eat our imaginary treats with, unless it just isn't practical.  This is another one that I get hammered on, every darn day. For me, it's just more convenient to eat peas, salad, corn, spaghetti, tomatoes, and yogurt with my hands.  Forks and spoons get in my way.

The second good-manner rule for my tea party is don't yell at me for eatin' with my hands. 

The hallmark of a successful tea party is sharing.  Let's say you have something on your plate that looks good to me.  I want it.  You share it with me.  Everybody's happy. Don't believe me?  Well, trust me, Friends, if I'm happy, you're going to be a lot happier.  So let's just say that if I see something of yours that I want, it's best to just give it to me.  I'll write you a nice thank-you note later. 

This is how it is at my tea parties, because... well, I'm wearing a tiara.  And I'm three and a half. 

What I can't figure out is why nobody wants to tea party with me!  Huh!

Welp.  I'll tea party with myself.  I'll see ya tomorrow, Friends!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Donut Day Was Yesterday!

It's 6/6/15, so I'm only 2/3 evil today!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you!

Hey, Big People, I owe you an enormous apology.  I really do.  I made a big mistake yesterday, and I need to acknowledge it.  I need to make it right.

I got so wrapped up in thinkin' about graduation yesterday that I forgot what was really important.  I forgot about the urgent matter at hand yesterday.

Friends, yesterday was National Donut Day.  Did you get to celebrate it?

You know, if you didn't get to celebrate National Donut Day yesterday, because you were all wound up about something else like I was, I think it's perfectly all right for you to celebrate it today, and I'll tell ya where I like the donuts the best.  Get out a piece of paper, Friends, and a writin'-stick.  Are ya ready?

I think Giant in Wellsville makes the best donuts, besides Donut Dude.  I'm partial to Donut Dude, but it might be a little ways out of the way for you.  You ought to be able to get to Giant in Wellsville, pretty easily today, though.  And when you get there, you'll want to get some Bavarian Creme longjohns, which are my favorite there, and also some of my other favorite donuts there: Buttercremes.  Sometimes they come powdered and other times they just have the chocolate up on top.  But the filling inside the Buttercremes is the BEST. 

Do not bother with the Angel Cremes, though.  The filling in the Angel Creme donuts tastes like the "bettercream" frosting on the cheaper cakes in the bakery case. 

As for which beverage to choose to accompany your donuts, I hear coffee pairs up with donuts nicely.  I like milk or hot cocoa, though.  It's all about whatever you like, Friends.

Hey.  Maybe I'll see ya at the dang ol' Giant.  Even if I don't, though, I do love the heck right outta ya.  You know that.  And I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, June 5, 2015

Before Ya Know It!

In fifteen short years, that'll be me up on that stage!
Hiya, Friends! 

Hey, didja know that today is Graduation Day at the school where I'll be heading when I'm a Big Kid?  It's true. 

It all got me to thinking about my very own Graduation Day, Friends.  It makes me realize that in just fifteen short years, I'll be up on that stage, graduating from the very same school Mommy and Daddy graduated from.  In fact, I looked up the year- 2030, and as it turns out, June 7th is on a Friday night, so it's very possible that I'll be graduating on the very same day that my Mommy did, only 34 years later!  Unless the School decides I'd be better suited to graduate on Friday, May 31 instead.

I hope I'll have had a lotta fun in school!  I hope I'll have lotsa friends, and that I get good grades.  More important than my grades, I hope I'll learn a lot in school.  I wanna be good at things and know lots of stuff.  I hope that by May 31st or June 7th, 2030, I'll know how to diagram sentences with the best of 'em, how to do calculus, how to really read literature, not just see it as a buncha tiny details to pick apart. 

I hope that I learn now to think, not just answer questions.  I'm talking about critical thinking.  I think that's something that's really important when you're a Big People. 

I hope that I learn how to accept and learn from criticism with grace.  I think I'm pretty great at stuff, but there's always room for improvement, even if it means I've gotta tear something down I worked really hard to build up.

It all seems like it's gone so fast, my schooling, and it hasn't even started yet.  I guess I just get to thinkin' around this time of year, is all, Friends.  I just wanna make sure that when the time comes, I'll have grown up into a Big Person you wanna know, you know? 

It'll be lotsa fun, I think.  I think school's gonna be lotsa fun, but 2030 can take its time coming for now.  I'm havin' lotsa fun, bein' Just Me right now.

Hey, Friends.  I love ya lots.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  If you have a graduator that you're watchin' graduate tonight, I'm sending warm hugs your way, Friends.  It'll all be all right.  I love ya!  Muah!

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Mowing Season!

This bubble-mower isn't gonna push itself!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Thursday to you!  Well, if it isn't mowing season again. 

Don't get me wrong.  I love it when the grass grows.  I really enjoy the few months outta the year when I don't hafta bundle all up in boots and snow-duds to go out and love the outdoors.  I even don't mind mowing.

Actually, I love mowing the lawn, here at the beginning of Lawn Mowing Season.  See, every year, it's like a brand new thing to do.  The novelty usually lasts a good six weeks.  Maybe eight, depending on what kind of grass-growing year is is. 

After that, it tends to get a little old.  I start to kickin' myself that I didn't lobby stronger for the self-propelled bubble push-mower.  I start tryin' to get Rozzie to do my mowing for me. 

I get to thinking that maybe the dandy-lines aren't THAT bad to have in the yard.  They look all cheerful in their golden yellowness, if you look at them through the right eyes, and those eyes are eyes that are tired of mowin' the lawn.

But I'm not at that point in Lawn Mowing Season yet.  Nope!  Not even close!  It's still NEW to me!

Anyway, I have some work to do, but I'll see ya tomorrow, Friends!  I sure as heck love ya lots!  Muah!

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

The Happy Kids Club!

Founder of the Happy Kids Club, right here!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Wednesday!

You know, a lot of the time, the Cool Kids Club gets all the press.  Everybody either wants to be in the Cool Kids Club, or they don't want any part of the Cool Kids Club.

I'm not really sure what it means to be in the Cool Kids Club, or how you get to be cool.  I think I'm cool, but I think that to be Cool, there has to be some kind of consensus on the matter that does not come from within.  I'm not sure what makes the consensus, or if you can quantify or qualify coolness or Coolness.  It just kinda happens.

That's all well and good, Big People.  I can accept that.  But I don't wanna spend my life being defined by other people.  I just don't  Like I said, I think I'm cool.  I'm not sure what anybody else thinks of me, and it isn't really any of my business.  I like people to like me, but if somebody doesn't, it doesn't ruin my day or anything.

What I'm saying is I don't think I can say 'Hey, Cool Kids!  I wanna be in your club!' and have it be so.  In fact, I think that would be kind of counter-productive.

This is my solution, then: The Happy Kids Club.  In the end, I'd rather be Happy than be Cool, yeah?  And I get to define definitively whether or not I'm Happy.  It's all me.  And.  You can be a member of my Happy Kids Club, too, Friend.  All's you need to do is put on a smile and say "I wanna be in the Happy Kids Club!' and it'll be so.

Don't think you have to have your Happy cranked up to eleven every day to be in the Happy Kids Club.  It doesn't work like that.  Even I'm not super-happy all the time.  When I'm feeling less than happy, I acknowledge the feelings and work through them, but I don't wallow in feeling miserable, mean, or mad.  Mostly, I'm a happy person.

So what do you think, Friends?  Does my Happy Kids Club sound great?  Do you wanna be in it?

Whether you do or not, I sure do love the heck right outtaya, Friends!  I love ya lots!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Settin' My Diet Straight!

Shoulda had my V-8 today!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Tuesday to you! 

Well, ya know, Big People, if ya know me, ya know I just love food.  All different kinds of food. 

Sure I do!  I'm just like any Little Kid, so of course I love donuts and cookies and chocolate and lollipops.  I mean, that's a given.  I don't like Tootsie Rolls, though, which makes Mommy look at me like I'm a little weirdo.  I do love black licorice.  I suppose that makes you look at me like I'm a little weirdo.

Anyways, I like the stuff that's good for ya, too.  My favorite vegetable is steamed spinach with vinegar.  I request it.  That's a real surprise, too, because back when I was eatin' all sortsa pureed stuff, I sort of disliked spinach a lot, because pureed spinach doesn't come with a vinegar dressing, and also, it just isn't very interesting, texture-wise.

The eatin' game really changed for me, when I got to start eatin' real food. 

When I really think about it, there isn't much in the way of healthy foods I don't like.  I think it's really important to eat a buncha different healthy foods, lotsa different colors.  That helps fill in all the gaps in a diet, vitamin-and-mineral-wise!

I'm feelin' a little off-kilter, Big People.  I think I'd better go and set my diet straight for the day.  It's really the best way to approach a Tuesday.  I love ya lots, Friends! Muah!

Monday, June 1, 2015

So This Is June-Mas

So this is June-mas, and what shall we do?
Hiya, Friends! 

Well, as you probably know, today's the First of June.  And it's Monday.  Whatever.  Back to it being the First of June.  June the First. 

Didja get a load of the weather out there, Friends?  Low FIFTIES!  Brrr!  You know, I've heard tell that it's been in the low fifties in these parts on Christmas some years.  Weird years, for sure, but still.

We are experiencing temperatures on June the First that are not unheard of to be experienced on Christmas.

I'm not complaining, per se.  I don't mean to whine.  It's just that when I think of June, I have visions of sundresses and butterflies and flowers.  I can practically smell the sunscreen!

But today, on this June the First, this First of June, I'm pretty much thinkin' of bundling up on the couch with a hot cuppa cocoa.  I've got my sundress on, but you can be sure I'm wearin' a long-sleeve tee-shirt underneath it.  And a hoodie over toppa it.  And I might just get past not likin' the noise from the space-heater, so I can have Mommy turn it on and warm me up.

That's why I'm callin' today June-mas.  So this is June-mas, and what shall we do? 

Anyways, Friends, I'm gonna curl up and try to get warm.  I hope you do, too!   I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!