If I RRRRRRolled Up My Brim And Won!

"If I had a million dollars..."

Hiya, Friends!  There's this oldie song I hear every so often when Mommy has me driving around in the Jeep called "If I Had A Million Dollars."  And these two guys sing about all the things they'd do if they had a million dollars. ... Huh.  Guess that's where they got the idea for the title of the song.  That's pretty clever!

Well, sure, I'd also buy more Tim Horton's coffee!

Anyway, the other day, I had a coffee-cup from Tim Horton's.  They've recently completed their "Rrrrrrrroll Up The Brim to Win" promotion, where you roll up the brim on your TimmyHo cup, and see if you've won anything.  My cup wasn't the kind with winning things on the rolled-up part of the brim, so obviously, I wouldn't have won anything even if I'd have rolled up the brim, but it did get me thinking:

What if I DID RRRRRRroooollllll up my brim and find out I won?  What if I won like a million dollars? 

I bet Dijon ketchup is good!

I looked to that old song for some guidance, but I don't want a real green dress- I have a few green dresses.  I don't want a K-car.  I have a Jeep, so I don't need a nice, Reliant automobile.  And for Pete's sake, I already have a monkey.  She's a purple monkey named Appie, and that's all the monkey I want.  Holy moly!

No, I don't want a K-car.  I like Jeeps!

So that oldie didn't help me out much on what I'd do if I rolled up my brim and won a million dollars.  And then it hit me.  If I suddenly came into a large sum of money, yes, even a million dollars, I think I'd hire the Cleaning Pixies. I saw a television commercial for the Cleaning Pixies one night during the news, and I went to their site on the World Wide Web to check them out.  You know what, Big People?

You give the Cleaning Pixies money, and they come clean your house!  How about that?!

It's Mr. Dustpan for me, until I roll up that brim and win!

If I had a million dollars, that's what I'd do.  I'd hire the Cleaning Pixies.  And if there are Cooking Pixies, I'd hire one of those, too.  That's one thing I can agree with the fellows in the song about:  I like Kraft Dinners, but I'm getting so I like a little more variety in my diet, and Mommy tends to stick with the same sorts of things.  Lotsa fish.  Lotsa salad.  I eat Kraft Dinners.  So a Cooking Pixie to come do our cooking would be just the ticket, and a coupla Cleaning Pixies would just be great.

And maybe if I had some dollars leftover, I'd buy some Dijon ketchups, just like in the song.  I like Dijon mustard, and I do eat a lot of frankfurters with ketchup, so I betcha Dijon ketchups would just elevate a meal of frankfurters and ketchup into an experience.  I bet it sure would!

That's what I'd do with a million dollars, Friends.  You can do your own things with your million dollars, if you had a million dollars.  But that's what I'd do with my million dollars.