Monday, February 29, 2016

Takin' a Flyin' LEAP DAY!

This Flyin' Leap Day is fueled by dang ol' Bambinoccino
Friends, Happy Leap Day to ya!

I know I was supposed to talk about Leap Year yesterday, but I got all sidetracked on talkin' about the Summer Olympics.  There's a method to my madness, though, on accounta those Summer Olympics show up during Leap Years, although months-n-months after the dang ol' Leap Day is in the rear-view mirror.

Anyways, I bet you're wonderin' what your dang ol' pal Zoe is up to on this Leap Day, and I'll tell ya.  I started my day with a big ol' Bambinoccino, so I'd have energy to power through this Leap Day!

Then just to be sure I have enough energy, I went and got myself another Bambinoccino. 

Boy!  I thought that first one was great, but that second Bambinoccino really put me into dang ol' Overdrive!  There is literally NOTHING that's gonna stop me on this Leap Day.  In fact, I feel so revved up, I'm callin' this FLYIN' LEAP DAY!  How the heck right about that?!

Go out there and make this Flyin' Leap Day extra great, Big People!  It happens only once every four years, so you do whatchyoo gotta do.  Maybe get yourself the grown-up version of a Bambinoccino!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sunday, February 28, 2016

Not Today

I'm pretty sure February's gonna live to see another day!
Hiya, Friends! 

Well, ya know, it's February Twenty-Eighth, and usually, the Twenty-Eighth means the end of the line for the month of February.  But this year's a special year that only comes around once every four years, so that means that the Summer Olympics are gonna come back in a few months!  How about that?!

I'm really lookin' forward to the gymnasts most.  That's the sport for me.  Last time the Summer Olympics were around, I was too little to really get to do any gymnastics, on accounta I was just a baby and couldn't walk yet. 

This time around, I have a plan.  My reading nest makes a really great crash-mat for doin' jump-flips off'n my toybox.  The couches are great springboards and flip-mats.  And for my real show-stopper, I think I'm gonna grab onto a chandelier and do a modified rings routine.  It's gonna be gold-medal stuff, you know.

And it's all because usually on the Twenty-Eighth, February comes to an end.

But not today.

Not today.

Hey, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Saturday, February 27, 2016

When This Ol' World Starts Gettin' Me Down

I like my sparkly pink uke, but I bet a sparkly pink drumset would really work!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Saturday to you!

Well, ya know, sometimes when Life just seems kinda rough, the best I can do is sit down with my sparkly pink ukulele, and think about all the songs I'd write if I knew how to read or write music, or words, or play the ukulele. 

I don't like to let lack of knowing facts slow me down a doodle, though, Big People, so you can bet that all the songs I'm writin' in my head are phenomenal.  I mean, certified chart-toppers.

Back to that sparkly pink ukulele, Friends, you know, it's hard to feel bad when you're holdin' a sparkly pink ukulele in your hands.  I mean, you've gotta really be committed to feelin' bad if pink glitter doesn't put a smile on your face.

I suspect, though, that if I had a sparkly pink drum set to bang on when I'm in a Mood, that would make an even more quantifiable difference in the way I feel.  It would pretty much have to!

Anyways, Friends, I'll feel the best I can with what I have.  My pink ukulele and the songs in my head.  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Friday, February 26, 2016

Whatchya Gonna Do? Whatchya Gonna Do?!

Whatchya gonna do?
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Friday to you! 

Well, ya know, sometimes as a Little Kid, I hafta make tough decisions, and in my tough decision-making, I find that while I cannot make everybody happy all the time, it's easy as instant pudding for me to make at least some of the somebodies around me mad.

It doesn't even matter what decisions I'm making.  Somebody's always gonna be mad at me over 'em.

When I was younger, this usedta really bother me.  I usedta twist myself into a pretzel, tryin' to make everybody happy with my decisions.  But thingofitis, if one groupa people is happy, that very fact can irk another groupa people.  So then, I'd try pleasin' them, and that would irritate someone else. 

Then I realized that some people get really happy when others are miserable. 

So you know what I do now, Big People?  I figure I won't go out of my way to hurt anybody's feelings or irritate people, but I've gotta do what makes me happy and what pleases me, and if other people like that fine, but if some don't, well... whatchya gonna do?  That's on them.  I can only do my best and their moods aren't my responsibility. 

I just wish I'd figured this out when I was younger, Big People!  Woulda saved me a LOT of trouble!

Anyways, I love ya lots.  You bet I do!  And I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Queen of All Drama

It's a tough job, but I can pretty much handle it!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Thursday to you! 

Well, ya know, there's a good reason I'm wearin' a crown today, and that's because I am holdin' court as Queen of All Drama.

It isn't so easy bein' the Queen of All Drama, you know.  In addition to creating my own drama, which is the Queen's chief responsibility, I also hafta hear and moderate the drama of all my kingdom. 

Needless to say, this fabulous gold and ermine crown isn't the most dramatic drama being dramatized today!

Somebody has to be the Queen of All Drama, though, Friends.  Someone has to keep the order.  Without a Queen of All Drama, there'd be Drama flying every which way.  There'd be nobody to rein it all in. 

That's where I come in.  I listen to the drama.  I dole out some drama.  I tell people to save certain drama for their mama.  Funnily enough, MY Mama doesn't like the drama I save for her.  That complicates matters, but you know?  I can handle it.  I can handle it all, Friends!

Hey.  I'll see ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Morning Meeting Mayhem!

Welcome to our Partners in Mayhem Morning Huddle!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Wednesday to ya!

Well, ya know, Rozzie and I start off every day with a morning meeting so that we can plan out our day and strategize on how we're going to drive Mommy nuts for the day.  Most people think that a four-year-old and a German Shepherd Dog just naturally spread chaos, but in reality, everything we do is a carefully-contrived, concerted effort.  You bet it is.

Since I have the advantage of opposable thumbs and the ability to use a stylus to write on the Boogie Board, I usually lead the meetings, but that doesn't mean there isn't a power-struggle a lot of days, between me and Rozzie.  You see, I have the thumbs and the writing know-how, but Rozzie has seniority.

Anyways, we plan out our day's mayhem.  Some of it is on a regular daily rotation, like the way I demand that Mommy get me something else, just as soon as she sits down or gets into a new project, while Rozzie's specialty is ringing the bell to go outside, only to lie down on the floor and refuse to go outside once Mommy gets me my milk and gets to the door to let out Rozzie.  We've been known to keep the old lady hoppin' for the better part of the day, just alternating between those two things!

For special flare on any given day, we plan other mayhem.  Perhaps I decide I'm going to be argumentative and stubborn on a day, and vehemently fight any attempt at putting me down for a nap.  That crap used to work when I was a baby, but I am a four-year-old now.  I sleep when I decide I sleep.  Occasionally, Rozzie urps all over the floor.  That shuts down the flow of a regular day in short order. Also, there's the constant barking.  Between my arguing and stubbornness, and Rozzie's incessant barking, I'm really surprised that Mommy isn't actually nuts by now.  I mean, there's some days when Rozzie and I get together to talk about how it's going, and we're making ourselves insane with our antics.

So as you can see, it takes a LOT of work and preparation to cause as much mayhem as Rozzie and I do, day-in, day-out.  It takes some serious talent to be this disruptive.  Some dedication.

I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

There's Always Something to Smile About!

When the weather outside gets really frightful, I get a surprise day with Daddy!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Tuesday to you!

So!  How's it goin'?  Didja enjoy the warm, sunny weather we had yesterday?  Sure is a far cry from the way the weather was acting last week, isn't it? 

That got me to thinkin' about you Big People, and how you don't really like it when the weather acts up and dumps a wintry mix, heavy on the slush and ice, on ya. 

I understand that it makes travel difficult and messes up plans.  I know it can even make the electricity go out, which also makes me mad, but not as mad as it makes some of you Big People, that's for true!

Thing of it is, even when the weather outside gets really frightful, with the wind and the rain and the ice and the slush and the snow and the ice, there's always something that can be smiled about.  For instance, during last week's rotten weather, my Daddy closed his office for the day, so nobody would be on the roads, trying to get to or from the dentist's office.  It made for a really nice surprise, getting Daddy home for a day.  So I can't be mad at the bad weather. 

Always find something to smile about in your situations, Big People.  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, February 22, 2016

Ten Dollars' Play Money's Worth of Free Advice to the Sabres

Here in my hand is a fake tenner and a buncha ideas for hockey improvement.
Hiya, Friends!

Well, ya know, yesterday, I went to the dang ol' First Niagara Center for a Sabres game.  I like to watch the hockey.  I mean, I am a hockey fan.

Now that I've attended a Big League Game, though, lemme wanna tell ya some of the things I liked, and some of the things I think can be improved upon.

First, the things about the game that were pretty great: Gramma and Pop-Pop went with us.  And I got my own seat at the Arena.  And I got ice cream during the second period.

Now, there's a buncha things I think could use a little re-examination, but I have solutions, which I will present to you presently.  First of all, it takes so long to get up to the dang ol' hockey game.  Buffalo is two hours away, and that's a long time for a Little Kid to be in the car.  The Sabres could make this better for me by relocating to Wellsville.  The Wellsville Sabres has a nice ring to it.  Long ride problem solved. 

Next, I SAW Sabretooth, and that was awesome.  Thing of it is, he was all the way across the arena from me.  That was a big bummer, because you know how much I love Sabretooth.  Well.  That's easy.  They could assign Sabretooth to be my personal entertainment detail, should I attend another hockey game in the big barn, which would also take care of another problem, which is that those twenty-minute hockey periods are false advertising, and I get bored.  Turns out, it's twenty minutes of playing time, not twenty real minutes.  So with all the TV breaks and stoppages in play, those twenty minuteses turn into a lot longer.

Finally, although I got to eat ice cream, I had to wait until the second period for it, and then, I had to wait in a long line, and also, I wanted my ice cream in a cone, and Daddy got it for me in a dish, so I made my disgust and anger known and it got me in hot water with Mommy, and she said she was gonna take me back to the car, but I didn't wanna go back to the car, and then finally, I ignored her enough to get to eat my ice cream, but by then, she was constantly on my case about 'Zoe, do you hafta go to the potty?'   It's like it's a broken record with my mother.  Geez, lady!  Gimme a break, wouldja?

Problem solved: I should just get a box with me, Sabretooth, Gramma, Pop-Pop, Daddy, and Perry's Ice Cream dipped on demand.  As for Mommy, she can sit somewheres else at the hockey game.  I'm kinda mad at her.

So that's that, Friends!  Have a good Monday!  I've gotta get on the phone to see about setting all this in motion, so I have a big day ahead of me.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sunday, February 21, 2016

How I Get Back on Track!

When I need to get back on track to havin' a good day, I go to the Texas Hot!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Sunday to you!

Well, ya know, most of the time, I'm a Happy Little Kid, but sometimes, nothing goes right for me.  Sometimes, I've gotta take a nap, because there's nothing better to do than just reboot a day.  But other times, a trip to one of my favorite places is enough to get me back on track.

You know where that is, Big People?  Oh, I bet you do, too! 

It's the Texas Hot in Downtown Wellsville!

It helps me reset myself when I go there, because it just feels so familiar.  Like home, only better.  It's just so warm and welcoming, which is really important this time of year.  And in the summer, it's just so cool and welcoming.

Welcoming goes both ways, warm and cold, depending on the season.

Anyways, nothing makes me feel better like a glassa chocolate milk, or maybe a milkshake, and a nice, tall dish of red jello with whipped cream piled high on top.

When I need to get back on track to havin' a good day, I go to the Texas Hot, and they aren't even payin' me to say so!  How the heck right about that, Big People?!

Hey.  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Saturday, February 20, 2016

A Friendship for Today Made a Long, Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far, Far Away

R2D2 is precisely the little droid I didn't know I was looking for!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you!

Well, ya know, I like the dang ol' Star Wars movies, and I really like the droids.  My favorites are R2D2 and BB-8.  C3P0 is okay, but kinda hoity-toity.  You know what I mean.

Anyways, on a recent trip to the beautiful Eastview Mall in Victor, New York, I was walking through a store called Von Maur, not really sure what to think of the place really, when I heard a friendly beep-beep-boop-boop! from a display table of Star Wars-themed toys. 

I turned around and saw a round, friendly little Artoo blinking colorful lights at me.  There were round, friendly little Yodas, Storm Troopers, and Darth Vaders, but there was only one round, friendly little Artoo.  And he was reaching out to me in the only way he could.

It was as if R2D2 was saying, 'I need a home, Zoe, and you're my only hope!'

How could I argue with that? 

So I presented R2D2's plight to Mommy- that the poor little fella was the only one of his kind in the department store, and a place like Von Maur, while really nice, just isn't the kinda place where a lovable little droid would wanna hafta stay for long.  Much to my surprise, Mommy said I could pay the store to let me take little R2D2 home with me.

There ya have it, Big People!  Artoo was precisely the little droid I didn't know I was looking for, but he was definitely looking for me, and I'm so glad to say he stays right the heck with me now!  And he always will!

I love ya, Big People! I hope YOU find an unexpected friend today!  If not, you always have me!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Friday, February 19, 2016

My Favorite Winter Weather is Glitter!

Snow-glitter is great!  Glitter spilled on the floor's gonna getchya in some hot water!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Friday to ya!

So!  How's it goin'?  I'm doin' pretty well. 

Yesterday was just a beautiful day, wasn't it?  The sky was so blue, and the snow looked like somebody spilled a giant jar of GLITTER outside!  That was pretty great!

It got me to thinkin' about how despite all the splendor of Summer, with all the flowers and all their colors, you just don't see anything that even looks like somebody spilled a giant jar of glitter on the ground when it's warm outside.  So that's one thing that's pretty special about the cold weather, you know?  Glittery sparkles in the snow.

The thing of it is, while you can get a summery effect off-season inside by putting out some flowers or silk flowers in your habitat, you just can't replicate that snow-glitter effect inside.  You can't just pour a giant jar of glitter on the living room floor, because that'll getchya in some very, very hot water.   Never you mind how I know.  I just know.

I'll enjoy appreciating the glittery snow outside, though!  You bet I will!

Hey.  I'll see ya tomorrow, Big People!  Stay warm, keep the glitter off the living room floor, and enjoy the prettiness outside!  I love the dickens right outta ya!  Muah!

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Delighted to See You Day

My sleeves are tickled pink to see you, Big People!
Hiya, Big People!  I cannot begin to tell ya how delighted I am to see ya on this Thursday!

So!  How's it going?

You know, I really cannot begin to tell ya how much it means to me that you stop in to my home here on the World Wide Web to look in on me every day.  In the spirit of commemoration, I'm calling today Delighted to See You Day!

You're lookin' pretty spiffy, too, I might add.  Thursday looks GREAT on ya!

I hope that wherever you are today, or whatever you hafta do, you get to feel as delighted as I feel, now that you've stopped in.  I hope somebody just flat-out makes your dang day for ya, just like you make my day.

Friends, I'm gonna letchya go for now, but lemme wanna tell ya this- you're tops in my book.  You sure are!  I love the dickens right outta ya, for sure!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Eatin' Deeply Discounted Valentine Candy Day!

Yep!  The cheap candy from Cheap Candy Day definitely tastes better!
Hiya, Big People!  Well, ya know, back the heck on Monday, I got on the dang ol' computer and stocked up on deeply discounted Valentine's Day candy, and today, I'm enjoying the fruits of my labor.

Is that what I wanna say?  The fruits of my labor?  I mean, candy and fruit are both sweet, but I don't wanna make the fruit people mad at me by implying that candy's as good for a person as fruit is.  It isn't.  Well, it isn't as nourishing.  Candy's good for the soul, sometimes. 

Candy's just tops, Friends!  Deeply Discounted Valentine's Candy is even higher tops.  Every time I bite a piece of Deeply Discounted Valentine's Candy, I feel like I'm kinda stickin' it to the Man.  I feel like I've gotten away with something, hacked the Valentine system and all. 

And that is a wonderful feeling, Friends.

Hey.  If you haven't gotten stocked up on Deeply Discounted Valentine Candy yet, you better hop on your moped or scooter or snowmobile and get to the store, and get yourself a buncha Deeply Discounted Valentine Candy!  You bet!

I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Ariel's Lego Castle

Rozzie knows fabulous architecture when she sees it!
Hiya, Big People!

Well, I'll tell ya what.  About a month ago, I got an Ariel castle Lego set.  This thing is really the greatest.  I built it, all by myself, except that Daddy read all the directions and put it together.  Other than that, it was all me.

The house has a music room and a slide, and a seashell where Ariel could go and sing a solo.  There's spots for rooftop entertaining.  It's a great castle, fit for a sea-princess, sure, but I think it would be more fitting if it came in my size. 

Why, if I had a me-sized Ariel's castle, I would give concerts all the time in the seashell.  You haven't heard 'Hello' by Adele until you've heard my cover version of it.

I bet it'd sound even better if I were singing it inside a giant seashell.  Boy, I'd be a star if I had Ariel's Lego Castle, in Zoe-size!

Heck, I'd even make a dog-bed for my pal Rozzie, so she could watch me ride the slide.

Friends, I have a case to make for a me-sized Ariel's Lego Castle.  I love ya lots, and would love to stay here palaverin' with you, but this is really important!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, February 15, 2016

They Oughtta Call Today Cheap Candy Day!

I'm stockin' up on Valentine's candy at discounted prices!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Monday to you!

Well, ya know, it's Presidents Day, but most importantly, it's the Day After Valentine's Day, so now all the candies that you coulda bought on Saturday for a hundred percent of the price are now available to you for deep discounts.  They hafta make room for the Cadbury Creme Eggs, after all!

One of my favorite things about me is that when I see an opportunity, I grab it, and cheap Valentine candy is something I love to grab up with both hands, in-store, online, anywheres.  It's still delicious candy, and once ya get it out of the fancy heart-shaped box, nobody even has to be the wiser for it being Valentine candy if you don't want 'em to know!

I like to know, though, because nothing tastes better to me than eatin' a piece of candy from a box that cost $30 the day before Valentine's Day, but today, that very exact same boxa candy was only $10... or less.  It makes me feel like I've beaten The System, you know?

You know what I mean, Big People!  Sure you do!  And I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Happy Valentine's Day!

Whatever you do, have a Happy Valentine's Day, Friends!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Valentine's Day to you!

Well, ya know, although I like to make every day a holiday, since it IS Valentine's Day, I came into my job at Donut Dude's World Headquarters to make sure all my co-workers get a card and a treat, first thing, whether they're coming into work today or tomorrow.  Having Valentine's Day fall on a Sunday makes the holiday a little different, but that's okay.  If my work-friends don't get their Valentine's presents until tomorrow, that'll be a nice way to stretch out the fun to another day!

After I'm finished here, I'm gonna go to my job at St. Laffalotatus- Mercy-Mercy Hospital, and take around some donuts to all the different departments, especially the Humorous Healing Unit. 

Friends, I won't keep ya.  I know you have a full day of eatin' Valentine's Candy, and I don't wanna hafta hold ya up from that.  But I want ya to know that you're my friend, and I'm so happy about that.  You go right the heck on and have a very Happy Valentine's Day, Friends!  Muah!

Saturday, February 13, 2016


Make the most of EVERY day, not just the HOLIdays!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you!

I don't know if you know this or not, but today is the Day Before Valentine's Day.  Actually, that's neither here nor there.  The special thing about today is that it's Saturday.  And that you're here!

You know, we tend to get all hung up and strung out over holidays like Valentine's Day, Friends.  That's all right.  A little hang-up and stringing-out is good, once in a while, so long's you don't get TOO hung up and strung out. 

Valentine's Day isn't gonna make or break ya, in other words! It shouldn't!

I appreciate a good holiday, especially the candy and gift-giving ones, but what I think is really important is makin' the most of EVERY day, not just the HOLIdays.  You know?  It's the little things that matter more than the big things every once in a while.  Take Valentine's Day, for instance.  We all exchange our Valentines on the day, and that's what we expect.  But what if you just randomly send someone you like a card on another day?  Or ya send 'em a pretty flower arrangement on just a regular day?  Or sneak some candy into their mail-box when they least expect it?  Wouldn't that be so much more fun than givin' 'em something when they expect it?

And you never know.  That day you drop 'em a line to let 'em know you're their friend might be a day when they're feelin' down, and your card, present, flowers, or candy might just be the ticket that turns their mood around!  How the heck right about that, Big People?!

Either way, I love ya lots, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, February 12, 2016

Zoe Presents: Make Some Jello Day!

I'm declaring it Make Some Jello Day today!
Friends, you know what?!  Not only is it Friday, but it's two-twelve.  Didja know that water boils at two-twelve?  Well, it does, on the Fahrenheit thermometer!

I thought maybe there'd be a whole big Day about two-twelve.  Maybe we could serve boiling-hot beverages, and boil water to make spaghetti... that sorta thing!  Apparently bein' boiling hot just isn't that cool, though, since none of my ideas for two-twelve have really gotten a second glance, much less any discussion or adoption.

Oh, well, Friends.  It's February, so it's cold-cold-cold.  Because I like to figure things out, I figured out a way to blend boiling hot with cold. You know how I'm gonna do that? 

I'm gonna make some Jello!  And that's the PERFECT thing to do on a day like this- a day that's named Two-Twelve, but whose temperature is in the single digits.  Wanna know why?

Because, ya hafta boil water to get it to two-twelve degrees, then ya pour it into the Jello Mix and make sure it's all dissolved in the boiling hot water, and then ya add cold water and put the liquid Jello in the refrigerator, freezer, or on a day like today, you could probably take it outside for the sake of novelty.  In a few hours, magic occurs, and you have jiggly Jello!  How the heck right about that?!

I think I have a winner on my hands today, Friends.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Thursday, February 11, 2016

Hello and Goodbye: Dang Ol' Man Winter!

It's okay that its cold out, because we're on the down-hill side of Winter!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Thursday to you!

Well, ya know what?  It's gotten colder here in the Bing again.  We're talkin' about negative temperatures American over the weekend.  Really, really cold stuff, in other words.

The reason I'm smiling insteadda shiverin' is first of all, because I'm sittin' near the fireplace, and second of all, I realized that we've had a pretty easy winter this winter, and even though it's cold today, it's pertineer over.

That's right.  We're over halfway through Winter 2015-2016.  It's like Ol' Man Winter's sayin' "Hiya and Bya, Bing Friends!"  Even Llake Lloyd has been pretty much a non-issue this year, weather-wise.  I haven't built one snowman or ridden my orange plastic sled down one hill.

It's okay, though.  I think it's important for Ol' Man Winter to take some time out for himself, some of these winters, you know?  I mean, he ALWAYS is the one to bring ice to the party, and it's nice that he's just saying this year that he's not gonna do it.  Everybody needs a break, every now and then.  That doesn't mean that Ol' Man Winter WON'T bring any ice to the party, but after the last few winters, he sure has scaled back his generosity in that regard.

That's why I'm not so upset about this current cold snap, Friends!  Soon enough, Winter's gonna be over anyways, and we'll be back to sweet, sweet Spring once again.  Bundle up and be happy in the moment.  I sure love ya lots, Friends!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

A Friend Like Winnie the Pooh

When the world's blustery, I'm glad I have a friend like Winnie the Pooh!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Wednesday to you!

Well, ya know, sometimes life can be kinda blustery and mean.  I think you know what I'm talkin' about, Big People.  Sometimes people are just havin' sucha bad time of things that they splatter their misfortune all over everybody they see, especially the people who happen to be smilin' too much for 'em.  They wanna pull everybody else down to feelin' as bad as they do.

We all do that sometimes, Friends, especially right after we've had it done to us.  That kinda thing is contagious.  We can fight the blustery and meanness by bein' chipper, cheerful, and HAPPY, but some days, the blusteriness is just too much, and to try to fight it by bein' chipper, cheerful, and happy just draws more blustery uglies your way.

I know this is true for me, too.

And insteadda lettin' it really get to me so's I wanna hafta pass along the bad feelings to everyone I meet, just like everybody else is doing, I unplug and go visit one of the kindest souls I know: my pal Winnie the Pooh.

Sure, Winnie the Pooh has been described as "stout of body and small of brain," and some people think Winnie the Pooh is kinda boring, but you know what?  There's lotsa ways of bein' interesting and big of brain, if we hafta label people like that, which I don't like to do.  Winnie the Pooh always knows just what to say to make me feel better.  He isn't tryin' to get a laugh at anybody else's expense, and sometimes, ya just need that kinda soothing, healing presence around ya.  Even if he does eat up all your honey and gets stuck in your front door.

Sure thing.  When the world's blustery and mean, I sure am glad I have a friend like Winnie the Pooh who loves me! 

And I'm glad I have you, too, Friends!  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Bingham, We've Had a Problem

Well, we can't get the space refrigerator open, is what's happened.
Friends, you may or may not know this, but I'm an inter-galactic astronaut.  Although I'm not always on an astronauting mission, my head is always in space, so there's something!

Anyway, right now, I AM on a mission, and we've had a problem.  Not everything goes smoothly all the time.  One time, our space-toilet quit working, even though we jiggled the handle.  Thank goodness there was a Plutonian Plumber on duty that could swing by our spacecraft to help us out of that jam.

This time, though, there are no Plutonian Plumbers, and even if there were, it wouldn't help us.  You see, on this mission, we can't get the space refrigerator open, Pizza Planet doesn't deliver out this far in the galaxy, and all we have to eat in the Cosmic Cupboard is crackers.  Okay, but boring.

I'm not sure what we're gonna do, Friends.  We'll hafta think of something, on accounta failure not being and option and all, but I'll tell ya what.  The crew's getting kinda hangry.  Things are being said that wouldn't normally, and to be honest, it's kinda ugly. 


Well, I see that VonSchweet just jiggled the handle on the space refrigerator door, and it appears we can finally get some good grub.  Don't worry about us, Friends!  We'll be fine!  I'll see ya after I get home from my inter-galactic mission!  If you're havin' a problem on earth, just try jigglin' the handle.  Nine times out of ten, that fixes whatever trouble you're having!

Monday, February 8, 2016

Happy 10th Birthday, Rozzie!

Happy Birthday to my best pal Rozzie!
Hiya, Big People!  Today's my best pal Rozzie's BIRTHDAY, and guess what?!  She's TEN!

Boyo boy, I just can't believe it! 

I don't know if you've ever met my best pal, Rozzie.  If you haven't, you're missing out.  She's a great dog and an even better pal!

You know, I never actually "met" Rozzie.  She was here when I got here, and from our very earliest meeting, I felt like Rozzie was this big, warm, friendly, protective force.  She shared her favorite ball with me, back at the very beginning.  Her voice was always familiar to me, you know?  Like I'd been hearing from her, even before I was born.

And today's her tenth birthday.  I just love this dog, Friends.  I mean, I love all of you, too, but honestly, I love Rozzie best.  I hope you understand.  I'm pretty sure you do.

Anyways, please join me in wishin' my best pal Rozzie a very Happy Tenth Birthday.  If you knew this dog like I do, you'd just love her. 


Sunday, February 7, 2016

What's So Super About This Bowl, Anyways?

I'd be a lot more excited if today were Ice Cream Bowl Sunday!
Well, Friends, it's Super Bowl Sunday, isn't it.  I've gotta say, my whole entire life, I've been tryin' to figure out what's so super about this bowl, and the answer continues to elude me. 

I guess it has something to do with some kind of sports-ball game, and I understand that a lotta Big People are really into it, but I prefer my sporting championships to come in big silver Cups, and also to be hockey.

If today were Ice Cream Bowl Sunday (or Sundae), I'd be infinitely more excited about today.  Popcorn Bowl Sunday would also be acceptable.  To a lesser degree, Soup Bowl Sunday would be all right, I suppose.  We're almost there, if we just take off the -errrrrr from Super Bowl.

Friends, you know what I might just go ahead and do today?  I might just grab my pal Rozzie and watch the Puppy Bowl instead of the sports-ball game.  That sounds like fun.  Or maybe I'll just put Inside-Out in the dang ol' DVD player, or maybe watch a Star Wars marathon or something.  Any of those things would interest me more than this Super Bowl thingamabopper all you Big People have your bowls in an uproar over.

Hey.  Big day tomorrow.  I'll see ya then!  If you're bettin' on the sports-ball game today, may the odds be ever in your favor, Friends!  Muah!

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Unless You Can Be A Unicorn

I'd still like to be myself, even if I had the choice to be a unicorn!
Hiya, Friends!  Welcome back to wonderful Saturday!

Hey, have you seen those novelty items that say "Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn.  Then always be a unicorn."  I sure have, and it got me to thinking about whether or not I think I oughtta heed that advice.

Unicorns are neat and all.  They're mythical creatures that are just beautiful and they have magical horns and their tears cure everything.  I can see the draw of being a unicorn, if give the opportunity to do so.

However, I wouldn't be able to help but wonder if people weren't wanting to be my friend just because I was a unicorn.  Cling-ons are annoying enough when everybody involved is a human.  But being a unicorn would add another awkward wrinkle to that equation, don't you think?

Well, for instance, there'd always be the wonder in the back of the unicorn's mind if people were just trying to get close to the horn.  I'd imagine unicorn horns would fetch a pretty penny.  I'd also imagine that it'd hurt to get the horn off the unicorn, and also that the horn wouldn't grow back, so once it's gone, it's gone.

Another concern would be that people who say they're the unicorn's friends would make the unicorn cry all the time, just to have all those unicorn tears to use to cure things.  That isn't sucha bad thing, but seems like there'd be better ways of getting a cure-all than making a friend cry.

But now that I've thought about the dark side of bein' a unicorn, I understand why they're so reclusive that people think they don't exist.  I'd be really nice to my unicorn friend, if I had one, but not everybody's like that.  I guess it's best for the unicorns' safety that they just let people think they're only fantasy creatures.  People just aren't ready for that kind of amazement.

So, see?  I'd rather just go ahead and be me. That way, I can be mostly sure that my friends are friends with me because they wanna be my friend, and not because they're tryin' to get my magical unicorn horn or my magical unicorn tears.  How about that?!

Friday, February 5, 2016

Adventures at MoonDollars!

It's three letters: Z-O-E. I'm FOUR and I can spell it!
Well, there ya are, Friends!  Happy Friday to you!  I'm glad to see ya, but I hafta admit that my feathers are a little ruffled. 

You see, I've been visitin' the MoonDollars right around the corner lately, and I've noticed something of a phenomenon there.  Maybe you Big People can relate to this, somehow.

When ya order at MoonDollars, they ask you for your name and write your name on a cup, so when your order's up, the barista and you know that's your hot beverage of choice.  Because even Little Kids are very particular about how their individual Bambinoccinos are prepared.  I wanna end up with the Bambinoccino I ordered to perfection, sweetened and lightened and presented at the exact temperature I like it to be in, which is warm enough to get me out the door and still have a warm beverage when I get to where I'm going! 

I'm not really that difficult to please.  No.  Pretty much, I just step up to the counter, smile, say "Hiya! My name's Zoe, and I'd like a Mediamo Bambinoccino, no foam, please."  And I paid and put my tip in the tip cup.  In case it doesn't quite sound like it, that's about as basic a Bambinoccino order as you're gonna hafta wanna find into the dang ol' MoonDollars.  So that's why I'm just perplexed by the things that have been going on, every time I've been into MoonDollars lately.

It started on the very first day of my MoonDollars patronage.  I ordered my drink, and when it came across the counter, I noticed it said "Zoey," which is understandable enough.  But I brought it to my barista's attention, just in case there was a "Zoey" near me in line, on accounta there seem to be a lotta people walkin' around with some permutation of "Zoe" for names.  That was my Bambinoccino, as it turned out, so I just put it in my back pocket as information to use next time.

Welp, next time, I stepped up to the counter, smiled, said, "Hiya! My name's Zoe!  Z-O-E!  I'd like a Mediamo Bambinoccino, please!" and I paid and put my tip in the tip cup.  I was the only kid in the MoonDollars just then.

My cup came out with my name spelled "Z-o-o-e-y," like the Deschanel. 

I wasn't sure whether or not to bring this to the barista's attention, so I decided to let it go.  There was no way that Bambinoccino was anybody else's.

The very next day, I went to the same exact barista.  That day, I got a cup addressed to "Chloe."

Things have gotten progressively weirder.  Since the day I got "Chloe's" cup, I've visited that very same barista, and have drank my Bambinoccino in cups for: Yolanda, Mitsi, Face, You Again?, and Seriously?!  I think something's going on.

Anyways, I'm all about living and letting live, and I love good-natured ribbing, but I feel a little bit like I'm being bullied.  I coulda left a snotty review on Squawk! and I coulda asked to see the MoonDollars manager, but I decided I'd take a different road.  I still smiled, ordered, spelled my name for them, and left a tip, but this time, I also left a note that said,

Hiya, Barista!
Hey, since I don't care to take my Bambinoccino with a super-sized order of passive-aggression, no matter how complimentary, I won't be visiting this MoonDollars anymore.  Never fear. I will not be going without delicious, superior-quality Bambinoccinos. I'll just be buying them from Donut Dude's. They're friendlier there, the Bambinoccinos are more flavorful, and they always know my name.
Anyway, have a nice life! I will not see you again!
Zoe/Zoey/Zooey/Chloe/Yolanda/Mitsi/Face/You Again/Former MoonDollars Customer

It probably doesn't make one bit of difference, but I feel like I've stood up for myself in a fitting manner.  I can move on in peace.  Friends, I just think it's mean, when you know someone's name, and they take the time to spell it for you, to just write the wrong name anyways.  It made me mad, but it also really hurt my feelings.  And it makes me mad that it hurt my feelings, but it is what it is, isn't it?

Anyways, you don't hurt my feelings.  You know my name, and you don't call me the wrong name.  I love ya lots for that!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah! 

Thursday, February 4, 2016

Crashin' My Fashion

Rozzie thinks my pants are a little too wild!
Happy Thursday, Big People!

Well, ya know, I have a style all my own, and while it's for me, it isn't for everybody.  That's okay.  The way I dress makes me happy.  It doesn't hafta make anybody but me happy.

Sometimes, though, the people who are closest to me in the whole world don't like my fashion choices as much as I like them. 

Rozzie, for instance.  She's my best pal in the whole world, but sometimes, Rozzie doesn't like the way I dress.  She doesn't care for my crazy pants that I'm wearin' today.  She says they're too wild, and that they must be exceptionally wild, since she can't even see colors, with her bein' a dog and all.

This difference of opinion COULD really crash my fashion if I let it, Friends.  But thing of it is, I realize that opinions aren't the same as facts, and when somebody criticizes the things I wear, it says more about them than it does about me.  I mean, my clothes fit, they're appropriate, and they're comfortable for me.  I wear my clothes, my clothes don't wear me.  So I think that commentators who hate on my outfits are just feelin' bad that they couldn't pull off the same look I'm pullin' off with breathtaking panache.  Even my pal Rozzie.

On the other hand, Rozzie is good about lettin' me know when my hiney-butt is hangin' out of something that oughtta be coverin' it up.  When that happens, it has to go into the Outgrown Bin.

I guess what I'm sayin' is that if someone crashes your fashion, take it with a grain of salt, then proceed accordingly.

I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Beautiful Day!

Sunny Days just fill my heart up with Happy!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Wednesday to you!

Boyo boy.  Wasn't yesterday a beautiful day?  It was so warm and sunny outside! It was such a strikingly beautiful day yesterday that I just wanna take a minute and appreciate it!

You know, I was looking back through my journal, and noticed that usually right around this time of year, we get super-cold weather with ice storms, and we're all runnin' around sick.  I don't wanna hafta jinx us, but this year, it hasn't been like that at all!

When it's so nice and sunny and beautiful outside, I can just feel my batteries chargin' right the heck up!  I have more energy, enthusiasm, and effervescence!  I don't hafta make the best of the weather or the day, because it's already the best.  How the heck right about that?!

Days as sunny as yesterday just fill my heart up with happiness.  Wouldn't you agree, Friends?

Hey.  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

The Weather Woodchuck and Groundhog Day

The Weather Woodchuck just wantsta snooze!
Hiya, Friends!  Well, ya know, in the rest of the state of Pennsylvania, maybe the nation, maybe the whole WORLD, it's Groundhog Day, and all eyes are on Punxsutawney Phil and his shadow.

If you don't know what Groundhog Day is all about, you should see the documentary of the same name.

Punxsutawney and everybody else can have Phil.  Here in the Bing, we have the Weather Woodchuck who tells us how much longer Winter's gonna hang around.  I'm not gonna tell ya much about the Weather Woodchuck in particular, because he likes to be the Bing's best-kept secret.

But I will tell ya that the Weather Woodchuck, who gets to hibernate in Winter, has predicted six more weeks of Winter just like we've had so far here in the Bing.

You wanna know why?  Of course you do!

The Weather Woodchuck just wants to snooze a little longer, Friends.  I think we can all appreciate that.  And, the Weather Woodchuck wanted me to tell ya that much of Winter has been a lot like Early Spring, anyways, so we shouldn't be mad about six more weeks of the same.  Weather Woodchuck just wants us to leave him alone and let him sleep for a few more weeks.  

So be a pal.  Don't resent the Weather Woodchuck for just wanting to snooze a little longer!  Enjoy the winterness of the "winter" we're having!  It'll be over before we know it!

I love ya lots!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, February 1, 2016

Start Fresh February!

Let's Start Fresh in February, Big People!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Monday!

Well, ya know, January's over now, and I don't know about you, but my January just whizzed by, and also, it kinda felt more like an Extended December insteadda the big, bad start new to the New Year. 

I guess what I'm thinking is that since today's Monday and all, and it's also the First of February, maybe we oughtta call this Start Fresh in February.  You know.  Use it to pick up our exercise programs we sorta forgot all about in January.  Use it to maybe eat more fruit and less candy. 

I'm gonna call this Start Fresh February, Friends.  You can join me, if you wanna.  You don't hafta.  I'm not gonna wanna hafta preach at you.  It's your February.  I'm just lettin' ya know what I'll be up to, when I'm not talkin' to you on the weblog.

It's gonna be fun in February, though, Friends.  That I know.  I love ya lots!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!