|1. I start out by loosening my tight above my knee.|
Now, being sixteen months old, I don't get a real voice in the choice of what I'm going to wear. Mommy tries to make me FEEL as though my voice is heard, doing the old "Would you rather wear this or this?" trick, but I know the score here. That Mommy's preselected those outfits. She's prescreened them, so whether I pick this outfit or this outfit, it's a win-win for her.
|2. Once it's over my knee, it's fun-sailing!|
Take today's outfit. It's my purple polka-dot creeper, with a white body suit underneath. And zebra BabyLegs. Don't get me wrong. I love all my BabyLegs legwarmers, but today, I just don't feel like wearin' 'em. Why? Well, because even though it's been gray and drizzly today, it's still fairly warm out. And it's especially fairly warm in. I looked at the thermostat in the living room, and saw that it's 71 degrees in my living room! Why, in the summertime, it's 71 degrees in here, and not only do I not hafta wear my legwarmers, but I also don't need a long-sleeved bodysuit under my creeper!
|3. Whoops! Down over the shin it goes!|
So I've taken matters in my own hands, Big People. Mommy can play this "Which outfit do you want to wear?" game all she wants to. I'll play along. I'll point to the outfits. I'll let her put 'em on me. Fine, fine, fine.
Thing is, she can't have her hands on me every waking second. And the minute she lets go of me when it's this warm in the living room, Friends, these legwarmers are history. Believe you me!
I've been doing this with my socks, for as long as I can remember. Mommy would put the darned socks on me, and I'd just peel 'em right off. It's just bad policy to cover up my Fabulous Feet of Fury!
|4. Give it a look and make sure all my toes got out okay!|
Now, for the longest time, my BabyLegs didn't fit me, so Mommy wouldn't put them on me, and I didn't hafta know how to get 'em off! But for months now, they've been an integral part of most of my outfits. And usually I don't mind. They're warm, and more importantly, they're cute, and they really pull an outfit together, but I'm doing this on principal. I want 100% decision-making power when it comes to my clothing, and if that means taking off my BabyLegs, well so be it. Off they'll come.
Days like today, when it's downright tropical in the living room, it just makes good horse sense to take off my BabyLegs. It's tricky, because they fit kind of snug. I've tried to just grab 'em by the bottoms and pulling, but they're like those Chinese handcuffs! The more I pull, the tighter the BabyLegs get on my legs! How about that?!
|5. Buh-bye, BabyLeg! Thanks for coming!|
Once I get the BabyLeg shimmied over my knee, it just slips right down my shin, like my shin's a little sliding-board! Whooops! There it goes!
Now, even though it's the home stretch, that BabyLeg isn't off yet. I have to get it over my ankle and foot, and that's especially a delicate maneuver, because there's always the chance that my foot's going to come right off with the BabyLeg. Or my toes.
|6. I feel better when my leg can breathe! Ahh!|
I always check the BabyLeg for my foot or my toes, once I have it off and in my hand, just to make sure it didn't take one of my Fabulous Feet of Fury with it, and I like to make sure all my Toes of Terror are intact before I toss aside the BabyLeg. You can never be too careful, Big People. You never can, and here's why: one time last Spring, I stuck my foot in a sneaker, and my foot went to another dimension! That is a true story!
So that's that, Friends. That's how to handle it when your Mommy makes you wear extra layers you don't wanna wear. BabyLegs in particular. I like having this knowledge because it makes me feel like I have a little control over something in my life. That's important!
I'm afraid this is a hollow victory for me, though, Friends. You see, tomorrow, it's supposed to be c-c-cold again, and as handy as I am at getting my 'Legs off, getting them put back on is my downfall. I hafta ask Mommy for help, and that's quite a pill to swallow, I'll tell ya what.