Tuesday, February 28, 2017

It's Fact Tuesday!

Saying an opinion with especial conviction doesn't turn it into a fact!
Hiya, Friends!  As you know, today is Fact Tuesday, the day in which we really pay attention to our sources and get our facts straight in preparation for tomorrow, which is Ask Wednesday. 

I'll deal with Ask Wednesday tomorrow.  Today, I have a fact I would like to discuss.

A fact is something that can be proven.  That in itself is a fact.

Some facts are concrete.  You can search and find out just why a fact is a fact.  For instance, it is a fact that the planet we live upon is called Earth, and it's round like a ball, not flat like a pizza.  We know this is a fact, because even before the astronauts blasted off into space to gain a little perspective on our world, it could be mathematically proven that the world is round, not flat.  Smart people takin' measurements and usin' science, Big People.  If you try to argue against this, you're either yankin' everybody's chain, tryin' to start a fight, or you're delusional.

Now, "The world is a wonderful place" is an opinion.  You can't mathematically prove it.  From where I sit, yes, the world is a wonderful place.  I love people, people love me, and generally, things work out for the best in my life.  Someone else might live a life of ashes and see the world as pretty much the worst.  Neither of us is right, and both of us is right.

Sometimes, an opinion so close to bein' Right, and so many people agree with it appears to be a fact.  I caught myself on this one, whilst writing a draft of today's post.  My fact for Fact Tuesday is that the Texas Hot in Downtown Wellsville is just a GREAT place to eat!  Everybody I know seems to love the Texas Hot.  But when I tried my statement against scientific proof, it turns out that only part of my statement is fact, and the other part is opinion.  Further research proves that factually, I am correct in stating that the Texas Hot is in Downtown Wellsville.  Its street address, geographic coordinates, elevation above sea level, and very presence prove this to be true.  But it being just a GREAT place to eat, alas, is just a widely-held and highly-regarded opinion, because as unlikely as it may seem, there are a few people here-n-there who do not like the Texas Hot.  It's sad, but they're entitled to their opinion, and that means that there's more Texas Hot for the rest of us.

Happy Fact Tuesday, Big People.  Go out and seek some facts and identify opinions, mmmkay?  I love ya lots, which is a FACT!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, February 27, 2017

Reunited and it Feels So Good

I don't know if Ike likes my bike, but Fonzie likes my bike!  AAAAAAAAAA!
Hey, there, Big People!  Happy Monday to you!

Well, ya know, you might not have heard about this, because I've only talked about it over on the dang ol' Facebook Picture Show I have, but there's news about me and my bike.  Yes, the one I rode off the couch, resulting in my very first trip to the emergency room and my very first broken bone!

After that incident, Mommy figured that my bike is a bad influence on me and that my bike and I need to be separated.  And she succeeded in this dastardly plan for many, many months, until I accompanied her to the basement to sort the recycling, and there I saw it- My Bike!  Now, bein's as how I'm a Take Charge Kinda Gal, I grabbed that bike up and declared "I'm bringing this bike back upstairs!"  And because Mommy was sortin' recyclables, I got away with the bike before she could tell me no, and commenced riding it from one end of the house to the other, over and over again. 

It was great to be reunited with My Bike.  I'd forgotten how much fun it is just to ride it.  So I promised Mommy that I will NOT ride the bike off any furniture or counters or stairs, and she's lettin' me keep it, at least until Spring, when there's a possibility that I might get an actual bike with a chain and pedals and gears and everything.  We'll just hafta stay tuned. 

In the meantime, I'll enjoy bein' reunited with My Bike.  It feels so good, there oughtta be a song about it!  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, February 26, 2017

Pizza Comes In Logs Now!

Someday, I hope to live in a cabin made of pizza logs!
Hiya, Big People!  How are you on this wonderful Sunday?  I'm GREAT!

Well, ya know, recently, I had the opportunity to taste a delight called a "pizza log."  I ordered it off a kids menu at Duff's Restaurant.

Friends, I thought pizza was the ultimate in tastiness, but when ya roll up pizza toppings in a spring roll wrapper, deep fry it, and serve it with a side of fries and extra pizza sauce, you really have a winner.

It got me to thinkin' about how someday, it'd be fun to live in a cabin made of pizza logs, with oregano and basil growing for a yard, and a marinara pond with a breadstick deck on it.

I wouldn't wanna contract salmonella or any other food-borne hoobie-joobies from eating my pizza log cabin or the marinara pond, so I'd hafta rig it all up to be under some kinda heat lamp, maybe have some kind of steam table underneath the marinara sauce pond.  That all sounds really complicated, though.  And if the heat lamp is warm enough to keep the hoobie-joobies away from my pizza log cabin and marinara sauce pond, it would probably render staying there very uncomfortable.

Not to worry, though.  I have a solution!

I'm going to play my "fantasy card" now.  A pizza-log cabin with a basil and oregano lawn and a big, marinara sauce pond and breadstick deck is definitely seated within the realm of complete and utter fantasy.  Just like my flying cupcakemobile I like to make up stories about.  Existable only in my imagination.  And as it turns out, food-borne pathogens just do not exist in the imaginary world in which I go to visit.  How about that?!

I still really like pizza logs, though, Friends.  They're DELICIOUS! 

I love you more, so I'll see ya tomorrow, mmmkay?  Muah!

Saturday, February 25, 2017

A Friendly Reminder!

Twelve minus two is ten!
Well, hiya there, Good Lookin's!  How's your Saturday turnin' out for ya?

I'm doin' great, because once again, the Twenty-Fifth of the Month has rolled around again, and it's time for my Zoe's Monthly Status Report.  Just in case you don't own a calendar or have access to one you can look at and reference.

Christmas is a mere ten months away, so I suggest that you start lookin' in the catalogues that arrive in your mailbox, and perhaps begin a color-coded referencing system for all the presents you wanna buy your loved ones. You can also cross-reference your markings on the World Wide Web, in case you go on a de-cluttering tear, long about June, and send those tabbed and color-coded catalogues to the recycling center.

It's never too early to start getting prepared for Christmas, Friends!  It truly isn't!  As for me, I'm gonna be spending today in intelligence briefings, so I can stay a stepper two ahead of the Elves on Shelves.  I have had a solid six Christmases in which I have managed to avoid Elf on Shelf infiltration of my home, and I aim to ensure that Christmas Twenty-Seventeen is no exception, and this is gonna be a biggun as far as challenges go, because I go to school in the fall.  I've heard when a kid goes to school, there's an uptick in spy-elf activity at their house. 

Be vigilant, Friends.  Be smart.  Be here tomorrow for more of my wisdom.  I'd charge for all this wiseness, but I love ya too much, Big People!  Muah!

Friday, February 24, 2017

To Find Yourself in the Best Light...

...Sometimes you gotta bring your own!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Friday to you!

Well, ya know, we all wanna be painted in the best possible light.  When you're painted in the best possible light, you look good and you feel good, especially if you're talkin' about the figurative kind of light.

The best way to make sure you're in the best possible light is to bring your own, whether it's a flashlight or a ring-light or a whole stage setup, or...

Well, frankly, a great attitude and respect for others.

That right there is the best way to find yourself in the best possible light.  Be kind. Be respectful.  Think before ya speak.  Be helpful.  Treat others the way you'd like to be treated.

Friends, the person who's ultimately responsible for paintin' ya in the best light is you.

I love ya lots, Friends!  And I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Thursday, February 23, 2017

When Your Day Tries To Take Away Your Sparkle!

Double-down on the sparkle, and grab yourself a Tootsie Pop!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Thursday to you!

Well, ya know, sometimes, you'll be cruisin' along, according to plan, when all of a sudden, WHAM!!! your day just backhands you so hard across the face it wakes up your ancestors!

And boy are the ancestors ever cranky, gettin' woken up like that!

So what do you do when a day does that to you?  What do I do when that happens?  When my sparkle threatens to be dulled?

I'll tell ya what, Friends!  I put on my rainbow pants, my rhinestone-studded top, and I grab a Tootsie Pop.  Nothing can touch my sparkle then!

The Tootsie Pop is the thing that makes a real difference, you know. 

So, Friends, now that you know, you'll be able to ward off the sparkle-dulling!  You double down on your sparkle!

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Keep Trying!

Anything new will feel awkward at first, but you gotta keep tryin', and you'll get better!
Hiya, Friends! 

Well, ya know, sometimes, I hafta learn new things.  Most of the time, I like to learn new things, because I'm good at learning new things, and I pick up on things fast.

Other times, though, the new thing is kinda awkward, and I don't get it right away.  That makes me very frusterated and angry!  I like to pride myself on bein' a quick study!

Thing of it is, when I step back away from myself for a little minute, I realize that learning the new thing is worth the struggle I incur in the pursuit of a new skill.  My life is FULL of evidence supporting this conclusion.

Well, for instance, I wasn't born knowing how to eat solid food!  I had to get used to it.  And lookin' back, at first, it was really weird for me to hafta sit up and eat off a spoon, insteadda gettin' to lounge around and drink from a bottle.  But once I got hooked into eatin' solid foods, I was off to the buffet and I haven't looked back!

I had a devil of a time, learnin' to walk.  Friends, I was the bee's knees at rolling over from back to front and front to back.  I could flip like a Mexican Jumping Bean Pancake!  I sure could.  And crawling?  Forget about it!  I mastered crawling and creeping, right out of the box.  But walking... that was a tricky one, and all I can say is that it was a good thing I still wore nice and fluffy diapers, to cushion my bottom, because I fell down a LOT!

Most recently, it's been learning how to use chopsticks.  I think it's a good skill to have, no matter what.  Using conventional chopsticks is still out of my range, but thanks to my training chopsticks, my learning process has been simplified. 

It's a process, Big People, and it's important even for you Big People to keep learning something new.  Remember that nobody expects you to be excellent at the new thing, right off the bat.  It all takes practice and patience!  Before you get all mad at yourself for not picking up on the new thing you've gotta learn, think about how you'd talk to your pal Zoe, if I were trying to learn the new thing.  So long as you aren't yellin' at me, try talking to yourself with that same patience.  You might find out that getting a handle on the new thing you hafta do isn't so hard, when you give yourself a break and respect the learning process.

So, Friends, be kind to yourself and KEEP TRYING the something new!  You'll get it all hammered out!  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Sure, Lock Your Homes!

How do I come up with this stuff?  It's no mystery!  It's ELEMENTARY, Watsons!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Tuesday to you!

Well, you might be wonderin' about today's title, and I have an explanation for you!

Have ya ever read any books about Sherlock Holmes?  He's a dapper detective who detected in London in the 1800s.  The reason I'm writing about Sherlock Holmes today is because today's date is 2-21, and Sherlock Holmes lived at 221B Baker Street.

Sherlock Holmes was keenly observant, and would often tell his assistant Watson that he could figure things out because it's elementary, meaning it's pretty easy, if you're as clever and observant as Sherlock Holmes. 

So how can we have a good day?  Well, it's elementary, dear Watsons!  Put a smile on your face and treat people the way you'd like them to treat you.  And remember that I love the dickens right outta ya!  I'll see ya tomorrow.  Muah!

Monday, February 20, 2017

Zozie's Choice

I'm pretty surprised at my choice, myself, Friends.
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Monday! 

Well, ya know, over the weekend, I was required to make a difficult choice, and I'd like to tell ya all about it now.

Now, we got in the pickup truck on Saturday and went to Corning.  I really wanted to eat at Joe's Crab Shack, but they don't have sucha thing in Corning, so it was pretty much a no-brainer that I subbed in the dang ol' Red Lobster for my Out-N-About Meal.  Pea-Yes- I had a lobster tail of my very own!  Yum!

Anyways, after our Out-N-About Meal, we had to do some shoppin' for Daddy's office.  No worries.  The thing I really wanted to do, my fondest wish for my Day Out, was to visit The Mall.  You know how much I love The Mall, Friends.  All Malls.  But especially the Malls that include coin-operated rides somewhere in their floor-plan.  All the quality Malls do this, and the ones that do not at least have some type of modest double-decker merry-go-round for me to ride or something!

But as it turns out, Mommy brought along her little purse that does NOT contain a roll of quarters stacked in an M&Ms Minis tube, and Daddy had just cleaned all the change out of his coat pockets and his change corral in the truck.  Evidently, we were completely surrounded by no quarters.

So Daddy said he'd take me somewheres even better than the Mall, for bein' so good while we were shoppin' for the office.  And he pulled into Toys-R-Us.

"But I've already been here!" I said.

As it turns out, Mommy and Daddy were gonna let me pick out a new toy at Toys-R-Us.  I didn't want to.  I wanted to go to the Mall.  So they said I could pick.  I could either go to Toys-R-Us and pick out a new toy, or I could go to the Mall and walk around, but not pick out a new toy, and also not ride the coin-op rides, because of the aforementioned dearth of jangly monies in our possession.

Well, I still wanted to go to the Mall, and I'm glad I chose that way.  See, I already have a lotta toys, a point I made a point to point out to my parents.  And I know that coming up in the Very Near Future, I'll be puttin' away all my overly juvenile toys to make room for more Big Kid toys.  I know this.  I told Mommy and Daddy I just kinda wanna get that out of the way before I accumulate more new toys.

And they were VERY impressed by my maturity I demonstrated in this decision.  So impressed that they took me to the Hershey's Ice Cream Stand at the Mall and let me pick out ice cream.  I chose Black Raspberry, small cone.  Not even Child-sized Superhero Sundae.  I picked a grown-up ice cream flavor, in a grown-up size cone, and ate it just like a grown-up, while sitting near one of the Piercing Pagodas and pondering the possibility of having my ears pierced.

I have decided to postpone piercing my ears for an excursion to be announced at a later date.  No hurries.

So I was all up in the choosin' choices over the weekend, Friends, and I'm still very proud of all of the choices I made!  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, February 19, 2017

Takin' Charge and Livin' Large!

I grabbed this bull by the horns, and now we're friends!  His name is Ferdinand!
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, ya know, I'm the kind of kid who likes to take charge.  I don't like to sit around and wait for things to happen.

For instance, one time at the dang ol' Target, I saw the most beautiful pair of glass slippers in the shoe department.  I wanted those shoes.  You bet I did.  But do you think I sat around, waiting for Mommy to do anything about it?

No.  I marched right up to the Target employee in the red shirt who was re-stocking the shoe shelves and said to her, "Excuse me.  I would like to buy a pair of those glass slippers I see over there..."

Well, as it turns out, Mommy had already found my size glass slippers and put a pair of Size 10s in our cart, unbeknownst to me.  And those were the most fabulous shoes in my shoe tower for the longest time.  I've worn 'em for years now, even though my feet are now on the cusp of Size 13.  But I'm gonna hold on to those glass slippers as a reminder that I took charge that day!

(I bet ya thought I went on an excursion and forgot all about the point of my weblog post for today, didn't ya?!)

Friends, you gotta take charge.  Live large!  Don't wait for Fate!

I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Jump for Joy! It's Saturday!

Sorry for the redundancy- Saturday IS joy!
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, you know, I am a Saturday enthusiast, which I realize is not a very unique thing to be, but it's who I am, just the same. 

Saturdays are great because they're special.  They only come once a week and usually mean FUN!  And pancakes and BACON for breakfast.

I think you'll remember how much I love Bacon.  Bacon is the food equivalent of Saturday.  It's because Bacon is just delightful.  Basically no downsides to it.  Unless you have a health problem that Bacon is ALL downsides.

But I'm five, so if you are medically or ethically prevented from eating Bancon, well.... more for me!  Sorry, not sorry!

But Saturday... It only comes around once a week, so it has built-in moderation, AND it doesn't have sky-high sodium.

So enjoy Saturday, Friends!  If ya need me, I'm gonna be figuring out how to make a Saturday-shaped basket form bacon!

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, February 17, 2017

The Best Things In Life Are Free...

...But you can save it for the birds 'n' bees, I want BACON!  That's what I want!
Why, hello there, Friendalinos!  How are you on this fine Friday?

I'm doin' great, because I wanna talk to you about bacon, and how much I love it.

There's a song called "I Want Money," that sums up perfectly how I feel about bacon, if you change "money" to "bacon" in the song.  Because I'm five.  Money doesn't mean much to me right now, because I can't eat money.  I can eat bacon.

And boyo boy, do I ever! 

In my house, the top shelf isn't where Mama hides the cookies.  Naw.  Cookies are fairly safe on the eye-level shelf.  I'm streaky with cookies and can take 'em or leave 'em most of the time. 

Bacon, on the other hand.  If I smell that bacon has been cooked in the kitchen within the last three days, I am all over the place, looking for where that bacon could be.  We used to keep cooked bacon in the snack drawer in the fridge, but not since I figured out that spot for it and polished off some leftover slices.

Nope.  That bacon goes up on the top shelf of the refrigerator now.  Mommy thought she was outsmartin' me, puttin' it up there, but I've learned that if I open up the refrigerator door and step up on the ledge inside the refrigerator, I can reach the bacon, and then it's just Game On.

I guess you could say I am a bacon enthusiast.  I sure say that!

Friends, I love ya lots, but I think I smell the sweet, sweet smell of bacon in the air.  I've gotta go investigate this.  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Thursday, February 16, 2017

Be Original!

There's only one you, Friends!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Thursday to you!

Well, ya know, Friends, I've come to realize something since I've been ridin' around the sun on this big blue marble we call Home, and that is that if you try to be anybody but you, you're wastin' your time.

It's true.  I mean, there's nothing wrong with trying on different characteristics of people you admire.  That kinda might stretch ya out of any comfort zone you're in.  Or if you have something like a shortcoming, it can help ya overcome that shortcoming.  But the trick is to use those characteristics sparingly, the way you'd use quotes in a paper!  You never want to let the borrowed bits overshadow your own voice.

If you've lost yourself in too many borrowed bits,  you aren't bein' the real you.  Some people would call this 'puttin' on airs.'  You don't wanna do that!

Have confidence in who you are.  Don't try to be someone... anyone else.  You never know.  There could be someone out there, lookin' for a friend who's exactly like you.  But if you're too busy borrowing too many facets of other people's personalities, you'll never know!

I love ya just the way you are, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Clearance Candy!

Put your hands up in the air for clearance Valentine candy, Big People! 
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, it's Wednesday!  More important than that, it's the Day After a Major Candy-Givin' Holiday, and that means that stores from Walmart to Walgreens are offering deep discounts on their Valentine candies in fancy red boxes. 

I think that Valentine candy bought for upwards of fifty, sixty, seventy percent off is more delicious than that very same candy purchased prior to Valentine's Day for full price. 


Because it's the same candy.  Nothing about the candy hearts changes chemically at 12:01 AM on February Fifteenth.  The chocolate doesn't get all soapy.  The red, pink, and white decorations don't fade.  The centers don't get all grainy, and if they do, that was bad candy to begin with, and you do NOT want it!  Conversation hearts don't get any less talkative.

I know that there are some people who get all hung up on Valentinin' on the very day of Valentine's Day, but I'm a kid who likes to stretch out my holidays and get the most bang for Mommy and Daddy's buck.  I could have ONE boxa candies yesterday, but today, for the same price, I can haul home two or three. 

And probably pick up an early Cadbury Creme Egg while I'm at it.

It's all about bein' flexible Friends!  Soon's I learned that, I became a LOT happier in this life!

I love ya lots!  Maybe I'll see ya at a candy-clearance sale today. If ya see a driverless shopping cart barreling down the aisle toward you, it's probably me.  Say hey and point me in the direction of the cheap Valentine's Day goods!

I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Rise'n'Shine, Valentine!

We love ya lots, Friends!  Happy Valentine's Day!
Well, howdy-doodie to ya, Big People Friends!  Darned if yesterday wasn't a Manic Monday the Thirteenth, but today we've woken up to VALENTINE'S DAY!

Ya know, I DO like holidays, but me and my best pal Rozzie have agreed that we're not gonna feel obligated to go buy each other expensive candy or Greenies just so we know how  much we like each other on Valentine's Day.  We'll probably wait until tomorrow to buy each other Valentine's Day presents.

There's solid research behind this strategy, you know, Friends.  Rozzie has tracked the prices of Valentine-packaged up candies before Valentines Day, versus how much the very same packages of candies cost the very next day, and she has found that stores deeply discount that Valentine candy as soon as Valentine's Day is over.

We're talkin' a whole big globba money off the price!

What's really important about this day is that my pal Rozzie and I are together and havin' a good time together.  That's more important than any cards or candies or flowers.  I would say Greenies, too, but Rozzie would roundly and soundly disagree with me for saying something like that.

When you're Rozzie, Greenies are tops!

We both think you're tops, though, Friends!  We love ya lots!  Muah!

Monday, February 13, 2017

Monday the Thirteenth!

Do your worst, Monday!  I have my sassy eyeshadow on today!
Hiya, Big People!  Well, it's Monday the Thirteenth, which is even more scary than Friday the Thirteenth, if ya ask me. 

Well, ya see, on Friday the Thirteenth, ya have the entire whole weekend to rest up from the antics of Friday the Thirteenth.  On Monday the Thirteenth, ya have all the baggage that Monday usually brings, plus a melange of mayhem only the Thirteenth of the Month can provide.

I think it's easier for a day of the week like Thursday, Wednesday, or even poor, ho-hum, Second Runner-Up Tuesday to absorb The Thirteenth's craziness.  That's why you never see me commentatin' on Tuesday the Thirteenth, or Wednesday the Thirteenth, or Thursday the Thirteenth.

Also, I rarely talk about a Saturday the Thirteenth or a Sunday the Thirteenth, because weekends tend to weaken the mayhemic power of The Thirteenth.  It's just easier to deal with it when you're relaxed and weekending.

But today's Monday the Thirteenth.  Prepare for the worst and hope for the best.  Your pal Zoe loves ya lots, Friends.  I'll ketchup with ya tomorrow, mmmkay?  Muah!

Sunday, February 12, 2017

Boiling Point Day!

This is some hot stuff, Friends.  Some Hot.  Stuff.
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Sunday to you!

Well, as ya know, the date today so two-twelve, which is also the commonly-accepted average boiling point measured on the Fahrenheit side of the thermometer. 

If we used Celsius, the boiling point would be a hundred degrees, and while it would be easier for places under a boil-water advisory to remember, there is no corresponding date that matches up to 1-0-0, and therefore, we would be sitting here, completely surrounded by nothing to talk about today.

So I'm glad the You Essive Eigh hasn't gone Metric and we can sit here, palaverin' on the significance of Two-Twelve on the thermometer.

Anyways, back to Boiling Point Day.  It's really important to remember at which temperature water boils, especially if your town or municipality finds itself under an aforementioned boil water advisory for whatever reason.  Just figure on it bein' two-twelve. 

Recently, a town near me had to go on a boil water advisory, and people everywhere were confused as to just how many degrees boiling their water entailed.  This is important, because boiling water kills all the germy bugs in it, and makes it safe to drink and cook with.  While it varies, depending on how high up you are, and the atmospheric pressure, it's just good practice to shoot for two-twelve.  It's okay to go hotter, really.  But never, ever cooler.  That's what worried me about the nearby town and its inhabitants.  That was the day that I opted to eat nothing there but packaged foods and drink nothing but beverages that came sealed from somewheres else.

It really isn't that difficult, Big People.  Just think of maybe makin' some pasta or Jello on February Twelfth, two things that require some boiling water on the date that spells out Two Twelve, and it'll be easy to remember.  Or look at the Celsius side of your thermometer and wait until the Stoddard's Solvent inside hits the one-hundred degree mark. You'll notice that one-hundred is right across from Two-Twelve.  That's called cross-checking, and it could mean the difference between a nice, boring day and amoebic dysentery.  Just sayin'.

You might be wondering where I come up with all my informations of which I am a font.  Well, I read a lot.  For your information, today's informations come from my Little Big Brain Spiral-Bound Indestructible Board Book of Infinite Knowledge for the Up-And-Coming Brainiac.  It's a book that comes with its own set of wheels to go around on, for infinite knowledge at my fingertips, whenever I need it!

How about that?

I'll see ya tomorrow!  I hope ya paid attention today, though.  There might be a quiz later!  I'm not saying that there will be, but I'm also not saying that there won't be the possibility of a quiz, either.  Love ya lots, Friends!  Boil some water!  Muah!

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Keepin' Warm!

Bein' warm is just a layer or two away!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you! 

Well, ya know, Big People, I have come to a Major Realization, and this Major Realization is that when I'm c-c-c-cold this time of year, when the wind whips and the snow flies, I don't hafta just sit on the couch with my teeth just a'shiverin'.  Nope!

I can go up to my bedroom closet and select a coupla additional layers to put on!  Isn't that something?!

Also, because I don't wanna hafta look like Ralphie's Brother in his snowsuit, you know, like a tick ready to pop, if the additional layer from my bedroom closet isn't enough, I can wrap up in a Soft Blanket, too! 

Friends, this is a wondrous time to be alive.  All these wonderful sweat-wicking, heat retaining and reflecting materials.  Electric space heaters I can use with supervision... The Settlers can have their simpler times.  Give me warmth or ... well, just give me warmth.  I like modernity.  I like bein' able to use technology to stay warm!

Friends, I hope you're stayin' warm on this Sensational Saturday, too!  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, February 10, 2017

Choosing Good Choices

I think I made the right decision.
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Friday to you!

Well, ya know, I recently had a choice I needed to make.  You see, my pal Rozzie has decided that she would like a job.  I have a job at Donut Dude's World Headquarters.  I may have mentioned this before, but I'm the Director of Donut Development at Donut Dude's.  It's a pretty good deal I have.  I get to come up with new donut flavors and I get to eat my own ideas.

Well, Rozzie has seen what a great deal I have going on, and she wanted to be part of it.  She wanted me to ask Donut Dude for a job for her as... get this... the Director of Dog Donut Development.

Friends, if I said I didn't feel a little chuffed and a little threatened by this, I'd be tellin' ya a story.  My first reaction was "Whoa!  Rozzie!  Can't you find another line of work to be in?  Product mascotness, maybe?  Or have ya tried retail?  A call center?"

And then I got to thinking... Maybe Rozzie is onto something.  Maybe there IS a market for dog-licious dog-friendly donut flavors, and if there is, why shouldn't Donut Dude be at the forefront of such a thing, and why shouldn't Rozzie be the one at the helm?

See, Rozzie isn't after my job.  While I didn't think Rozzie needs to have her own entire department at Donut Dude's right off the bat, I DO think that she'd be a wonderful Dog Donut Specialist within my Department of Donut Development.  And when I suggested the same to Donut Dude yesterday, he agreed with me, and even took my advice to let Rozzie be my office-mate. 

It's goin' great!  Rozzie has already developed a whole line of dog donuts.  She's on fire! 

I'm so glad that when I had the choice to either crush my best pal's dreams or to give her a boost and help her take off, I chose to give her a boost and help her take off.  There's enough for both of us, you know? 

Friends, my pal and coworker Rozzie and I have a brain-storming session coming up.  So I've gotta go.  I'll see ya tomorrow, though!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Thursday, February 9, 2017

Happy Thinkful Thursday!

Be Thinkful today, Friends!
Hiya, Friends! 

Well, ya know, it's Thursday, and we have a lot of things we do on Thursdays.  We can be Thirsty.  We can be Thankful (especially during the Month of November).  We can be Thrilling.  We can be Thrifty.

Today, though, I'd like us to be Thinkful.  Thinkful is like bein' Mindful, but we'd do Mindful Monday, hence Thinkful Thursday today.  Also, bein' Thinkful is a little different from bein' Mindful. 

When you're Thinkful, you pay attention to bein' in the moment, sure.  I mean, you should usually do that.  Unless you're gettin' a shot.  But where Thinkful diverges from Mindful is that bein' Thinkful is more of an intellectual activity.

Hold on there, Big Person.  Don't get up and go anywheres.  It doesn't hurtchya to think a little bit.  Your brain isn't really a muscle, but it likes to be used like one.  Use it or lose it! 

So when you're Thinkful, you read the world with your whole mind.  You really weigh what strikes ya as true, what strikes ya as false, what is probably true and ya wish it were false, and vice-versa.  When ya run up against something that just grinds your gears, when you're Thinkful, ya pay attention to why it really grinds your gears. 

A wise human once said "If something makes ya mad, then there's something in it for ya!"

I think what that wise human meant is that when ya get mad, you're reacting to something.  There's something contained within whatever it is that's makin' ya mad that has found a button of yours, and it's pushin' that button with its needly little fingers.  You know how you Big People are always tellin' us Little Kids that if somebody doesn't like you, it says more about them than it does about you?  Well, this is when ya hafta take responsibility for bein the "them" in that statement.  When ya dislike or react to something, anything, it definitely says more about you than it does about the person, place, object, article, thing, etc., etc. in question.  Whatever it is, just simply is.  You're the one reactin' to it, good, bad, or indifferent.

And that's okay.  That's why we're here, Friends.  To observe and react and interact.  And to examine. 

That's what Thinkful Thursday is all about.  Think about things.  Think about why you react to things the way you do.  Examine why it is that you like something, or why you don't.  It's really important to be able to do, Big People.  And I think being able to know what drives you goes a long way toward makin' the world a better place.

Hey.  I love ya lots, but I've gotta go.  I have some serious thinkin' to do!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

A Very Special Day!

We can't get over it bein' Rozzie's Eleventh Birthday!
Friends, you might know today as Wednesday, but to me and my best pal Rozzie, it's ROZZIE'S ELEVENTH BIRTHDAY!!!

How the heck right about that?!

You know, since I wasn't around at the beginning of Rozzie's life, I'm not sure I can accurately speak on what she was like as a puppy.  But Rozzie's been here for my whole entire life, and I CAN tell ya all about what she's meant to me.

I met Rozzie for the first time the day I came home from the hospital.  I was a mere two days old.  And she was this giant black snout attached to an enormous white head, peeking up over the side of my baby carrier at me.  There was something comfortingly familiar about her presence and her voice.  I felt like I'd had a lifetime of hearing that voice already, and I was just beginning!

Right from the start, that Rozzie dog has always been lookin' out for me.  One day, a coupla weeks after I came home from the hospital, I was layin' in my baby-swing, tryin' to go to sleep, and Rozzie brought one of her favorite rainbow-colored flexafoam balls to me, and plopped it right in my lap.  I was too little to play ball, but not too little to appreciate that this wondrous being wanted to play ball with me!

Now, sometimes, Rozzie's vigilance hasn't been sucha blessing to me.  Rozzie usually falls on the side of Mommy when it comes down to a Mommy versus Zoe battle royale, but I guess that's just because Rozzie loves me.

Well, I love her, too.  A whole, great big globba bunches!

And today, my best pal Rozzie turns Eleven.  Happy Birthday, Rozzie!  I love ya so much! 

Friends, you'll understand if I go and celebrate with my pal Rozzie, right now, won't you?  We'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Tuesdays- Am I Right?!

What's up with Tuesdays, anyway?  They aren't fun like Fridays, but they aren't as manic as Mondays!
Hiya, Friends!

Well, ya know, I have this thing about Tuesdays.  They're just kinda the Second Runner Up of the week.  Nobody wants to be the second runner up.

I bet Tuesday doesn't even like bein' the Second Runner Up of the week, if ya asked it its preference.  See, Friday or Saturday win Most Fun Day of the Week, depending on whether you're talking about the week as a whole, or the Monday-Friday workweek configuration. 

It doesn't matter how you configure the week.  Tuesday is never gonna be the most fun day of the week, and here's why: because you're likely still managing whatever mayhem Monday threw your way, and you know you've gotta get up and over the hump of Wednesday.  Both seemingly insurmountable things to accomplish.

And Tuesday, at best, wins only first-runner-up honors for Least Favorite/Most Reviled day of the week, on accounta Tuesday rarely makes a person feel as though they've been untimely ripped from the fun of a weekend.  Monday, though, that's how Monday rolls.

No matter how you slice it, though, Wednesday wins Mediumest Day of the Week.  The Day of the Week Most in the Middle.  There's pretty much no contest there.

I don't know what to do about Tuesday, Friends, other than just shrug and say, "Tuesdays, am I right?!"

Hey.  I'll see ya tomorrow, Friends!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Monday, February 6, 2017

Cinematic Conflict

Sometimes it's hard to know who to root for!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Monday to you!

Well, ya know, I'm a kid who loves the cinema.  I love all the great cinematic marvels made for Little Kids my age such as Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Trolls, Charlie Brown, Frozen, of course...

But the movie Ratatouille has me in a cinematic conflict, because I wanna root for Remy, the little rat that puts the "rat" in Ratatouille, but...

Well, Friends, we've had the displeasure of havin' a stowaway rat in our house a coupla times over the course of my life so far, and I've gotta say, it's a disgusting, terrifying experience, because common rats are dirty.  They carry disease.  The go to the bathroom all over and in everything.  they can chew electrical wires and ruin things, or even set a house on fire.

Rats are bad news, and they're pretty gross.  This is not encompassing pet rats that are maybe trained up and clean.

Anyways, in the movie Ratatouille, rats are misunderstood.  They're smart, and they shower off in the restaurant dishwasher.  They help Remy cook food.

But in real life, I don't want rats anywheres near food!

I don't know what to do, Friends.  I guess movies like Ratatouille put the "very" in "verisimilitude," which is a suspension of disbelief.  Separating the real world from the cinematic world.  Therein lies the crux of the cinematic conflict, Friends.

Anyways, I'll see ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sunday, February 5, 2017

It's SuperBowl Sunday, And...

I could not care less about today's big sportsball game.
Hiya, Friends!  It's Sunday!  How about that?!

It's SuperBowl Sunday, and imagine my chagrin when I learned that people are NOT all excited about a giant dish of ice cream with all the fixin's.


Evidently, the SuperBowl Sunday refers to a big sportsball of some type.  On the television.  Sure, I guess some people get themselves all partied up with party foods and beverages, but I'm just not that into sportsball.  Hockey, sure, but not the sportsball.

I guess maybe I can see if there's anything else interesting on the television today.  Perhaps something involving little dogs?  Or buying homes in exotic locales?  I love those kindsa shows! 

Maybe I can get one of my Driving People to take me to the store so I can buy myself a pint of fancy ice cream or something to enjoy while I'm watching something else besides the sportsball game.

But you Friends have fun, if watchin' sportsball in a SuperBowl is what you're into.  I love ya just the same!  I'll see ya tomorrow, bright-n-early!  Muah!

Saturday, February 4, 2017

Addition By Subtraction!

Sometimes, in order to make things add up, you gotta subtract!
Well, hiya, Friends!  How'd your week wind up?  Are ya glad to see it's Saturday?  I sure am!

Friends, as you may know, I am a girl who knows how to do math, make numbers work for me.  The neat thing about bein' able to make numbers work for me is that I can apply it all to other areas of life.

For instance, sometimes you've got so many things going on that you just can't make it all work out, so in order to make things add up, you gotta subtract.  You gotta take away some things to add life to your life and to add more into the things you keep.

Addition by Subtraction, it's called.  You can do it, Friends!  I know you can! 

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, February 3, 2017

From a Different Angle!

Lookin' at things from upside-down is my fravrite Other Perspective!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Friday to ya!

Well, ya know, something I'm learnin' is that when I'm stuck on a problem, a sure-fire way for me to tunnel through the problem is to change up my perspective.  You know.  Look at it from a whole big globba different angles.

Sometimes, you've gotta pull yourself way back and see things from a distance.  Other times, you've gotta get up close and really look at the deetiest of details of a situation.

My favorite way to change my perspective is to turn myself or the situation upside-down!  Usually, it's me I turn upside-down, because sometimes a situation is fixed in the way it's oriented, and also, when you're upside-down, your brain gets more oxygen so it can think better!  It's GRAVITY!

Try it, Friends!  If you're stuck, change your perspective!  It's amazing what you'll start to see when you look at things differently!

I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Thursday, February 2, 2017

The Weather Woodchuck Says....

The Weather Woodchuck lives in my yard!
Friends, Happy Weather Woodchuck Day!  I know that the rest of the world has its eyes on the more famous woodchuck from Punxsutawney, but here in the Bing, we have The Weather Woodchuck!

The Weather Woodchuck is a no-nonsense kinda fella, which is something I really respect in a weather-predicting animal.  There's no fanfare here in the Bing.  No top-hats.  No crowds.  No television cameras.

Here in the Bing, we are the ultimate Best Kept Secret. 

Back to the Weather Woodchuck's prediction, though.  The Weather Woodchuck FaceTimed with me earlier and said that his prediction is that Winter will end and Spring will come in their own times.  One leads the Other follows the One.  The trees and plants and hibernatin' animals are all enjoying their wintry rest, much the same way that we humans like to sleep in on Saturdays. 

So we're not to wanna hafta rush Spring along, the Weather Woodchuck said.  He asked me to consider how we feel when we just wanna sleep another five, ten, sixty minutes, and someone's there at our bedroom door with a spotlight and air-horn.  We wouldn't like that very much.

Anyways, Friends, before Weather Woodchuck went back to his cozy bed for a few more weeks, he assured me that I can assure you that Spring's on her way, in her time, and Winter really isn't that bad a guy, if ya just give him a chance. 

Friends, I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Those Darned Scraps Anyways

I can't bring color back into the world all by myself, Big People.  Not even with rainbow legs.
Hiya, Big People.  I know I don't look too happy today, and that's because I wanna tell ya about these insidious beings called Scraps.

I first heard about Scraps when I started playin' a video game called Tearaway: Unfolded.  It's a great but underrated game.

The Scraps take all the color out of the paper world depicted within Tearaway and turn it all to scrappy-lookin' newsprint.  They're malicious little bein's, or so it seems throughout much of the game.  I help the Messenger named Atoi bring the color back, by rollin' the things the Scraps have touched and turnin' it all back colorful, and also by gettin' rid of the Scraps.

Boyo Boy, before I played through the game the first time, I sure hated those Scraps.

But then, I learned why they act the way they do.  The King of the Scraps wants a glittery crown.  All that time, he and the other Scraps caused all that trouble over a glittery crown.  So the Messenger and I gave the King of the Scraps a glittery crown, and guess what?  The Scraps and their King threw a party and then went away.  It didn't hurt me or the Messenger to give the King of the Scraps a glittery crown.   It eliminated the Scrap insurgency right quick.  And I was able to bring the Messenger to my world, and reunite my pal Crunchy the baby Roaring Wendigo with his Mama.

We had all kindsa time to do lots of other things, when our time wasn't taken up fighting the Scraps over what amounted to nothing.

Thing of it is, I'm startin' to feel like the Scraps have infiltrated our world, the real world.  Seems like everywhere I go, there's people who just want to suck the color and life and fun out of everything.  And maybe that's just their purpose in life.  I don't think it is, though.  I believe that there are very few people who wanna go out of their ways to make everybody else miserable, and those people, ya just can't do anything about, except not rise to their game, because ya just won't win it.  Everybody else who acts like the Scraps, though, I think they act that way because they've had an unpleasant encounter with one of the people who are Truly Scrap.  And it's hurt 'em.  Maybe made 'em question the way they see the world.  Made 'em question if they're really a nice person or not, or a person who deserves to be happy. 

They've had the color and the life and the fun and the glitter just sucked right out of 'em by one of these Truly Scraps.

That's why I really go out of my way to be kind, Friends.  I'm just tryin' to keep the Truly Scraps at bay from spreadin' the scrap-ness and colorlessness in our world.  But I can't do it alone.  I need your help.  Can you just one day see how things are different when you don't take the bait from someone who's tryin' to get you all stirred up?  Can you just one day try to see 'em as a victim of the Scraps, who's had their color drained all out of 'em?  And that you can help fix it, if ya just show 'em a little kindness?

I don't like to preach atchya, but I really need your help, Friends.  Be kind to one another.  If ya have a choice between bein' kind and not gettin' in a good zinger on someone or gettin' that zinger and bruising their soul, please, please, PLEASE choose kindness just for one day.  I beg you.

I love ya lots, Friends, but we all have some serious soul-work to do right now.  Let's work together!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!"