The Secret to Success

I haven't been here long, but I know how to be successful!

 Hiya, Friends!  How would you like a little unsolicited advice?  Or maybe it IS solicited.  I don't know.   What I do know is that I have a secret for success, and I want to share it with you.

This isn't one of those get rich quick kinds of secrets to success.  I'm not going to tell ya how to make a million dollars in real estate.  I'm not going to letcha in on any big investment tip.  I'm fourteen months old.  I don't need a million dollars, and I don't need to invest anything.  (But if I were you, I'd invest in either Crest or Colgate, because I'm gettin' some serious toothage, Friends, and I love to brush my teeth with my banana brush!)

What I want to letcha in on is how to be successful, for real, independent of money, because money comes and goes.

I know I haven't been here for very long, I know.  But I've learned that in order to be successful, you hafta take your work very seriously.  You know what I mean?  Do what ever it is you do very well.  For instance, my work is helping to raise awareness of the plight of Little Giraffes.  I take that work very seriously!

Take your work seriously, but not yourself seriously!

But you can't take yourself seriously, because when you take your self seriously, when you have setbacks, it's easier to let them defeat you.  Don't be defeated, Friends!  Don't let outside things make you feel like you've failed, Big People!

We all have setbacks.  I have setbacks!  As you may know, I've recently begun walking.  Well, that's a big set forward, but sometimes, I fall right on my butt.  Yes, I do.  My feet come right out from under me, and down on the ol' dupah I go.  But hey, you know what?  I'm not going to let falling on my bottom define me.  I just get right up, give myself a little shake, and take right back off!  And what if people see me fall down?  Exactly.  What if they do?

It's not the falling down that'll getcha, Big People.  It's if ya stay down. 

So that's my big secret to success, Friends.  Take your work seriously, but don't take yourself seriously!  Dare to be a little silly.  Seriously.  I triple-dog-dare ya!  Hahahahahaha!

An Eatin' Conundrum

Part of me's ready for more Big People food...

Hiya, Friends!  Didja hear?  I have two new teeth!  On the bottom.  Well, maybe you haven't heard.  I don't think I've told anybody.  So here's my big announcement!  I have ten teeth!  My new ones are on the bottom, on either side.  I'm glad of that.  For a while, my teeth were coming in one at a time, mostly, so my smile made me look like a Jack-o-lantern.  I know my daddy's a dentist, and we know a few good orthodontists, and all, but I still was gettin' nervous that my junior high nickname would be "Headgear."  Might still be.  Who knows?  If that's the way it's going to be, I'll meet that particular challenge with grace and humor, and revenge will be mine on dodgeball day!  Hahahahaha!

Anyway, now I have kind of a conundrum.  Now that I have fifty percent of my deciduous dentition (woah!), I'm starting to feel a little pressured to start eating more and more Big People foods with my own hands.  Or with my own spoon.  I've been working on using a spoon. 

...but the rest of me still likes being spoon-fed.

I'm already a pro with eating things like Cheerios and Puffs and Yogurt Melts.  I pick those right up with my fingers.  Carrot pieces, cooked to where Mommy would say 'overcooked' if she were eating them, I can do, no problem.  I've even tried eating my Jell-O at the Texas Hot in Downtown Wellsville with my own fingers.  That doesn't go so well.  Over Thanksgiving, I tried to eat some turkey, cut up into little tiny cubes, but I didn't like it at all.  That surprised me, because I LOVE my turkey that's all buzzed up in my blender!  Cut-up turkey was a little dry in my mouth.  I didn't like the texture!

That experience with the turkey being a completely different texture than the way I know turkey made me think of something else preventing me from just taking the plunge and feeding myself all the time.  Do you know how cushy it feels to have somebody feed you by spoon, Friends?  Once I stop getting fed by somebody else, by spoon, that's that.  I'll be feeding myself for the rest of my life.  I'm okay with that.  But I just don't know if I'm ready yet, though. 

I feel like a big girl with my ten teeth, but I still like being a baby sometimes.  You know?  Heck, Friends.  I don't know what to do.  I just don't.  I'll tell you something, though.  You haven't eaten turkey until you've had it blended up in your blender, with a little squash, mashed potatoes, and cranberry sauce.  Mmmmm-mmmmmm, good!

Timewarps and Tesseracts!: How Santa Gets Around!

Here's a picture of me and my friend Santa, from last year!

 Hiya, Friends!  It's me, Zoe!  How is every little thing?  I'm doing great!  It's quiet, here, and at first, I was a little sad about that, considering Thanksgiving Weekend was so full of having fun with Gramma and Grampa and Aunt Colleen and Uncle Lorentz, but I just got off the phone with my good friend Santa Claus, and compared to his day, which isn't quiet, I'm glad it's quiet where I am!

See, Santa runs a pretty tight operation up at the North Pole, so during his Christmas Crunch Season, which runs from the day after Thanksgiving, until Christmas Eve, the Elves can continue the manufacturing, and packaging, and keeping track of the Naughties and Nices while Santa takes his show on the road.  Monday and yesterday, he was at the Ross Park Mall in Pittsburgh.  That's where I met Santa Claus for the first time.

Now, let's get this out of the way right now.  There are lots of shopping malls, and there's just one Santa, and even all the magic in the world can't have Santa sitting in malls across America, all at the same time, so he DOES authorize a buncha Santa deputies to sit in for him at the malls and places he can't make it to.  It isn't trickery, it's delegation, and because of a special communicating device in his suit, Santa's able to hear each and every kid that comes to visit his deputies, and also the North Pole sits in and listens.  I guess more than one time, a deputy Santa has forgotten to push the "Take-a-Break" button on the suit, and the North Pole has had to listen to deputy Santas visit the mens' room.  That's pretty embarrassing, but I had to mention it, and now we'll move right along!

Hiya, Santa!  It's me, Zoe!

But the real Santa, the one I met at the Ross Park Mall last year, he and I hit it off really well, and we talk on the phone every so often.  Sometimes we FaceTime.  He knows I run this blog, and he's agreed to give me updates from the road during his Shopping Mall Tour, before he heads back to the North Pole to load up the sleigh for the Big Night.

One question that Santa gets asked a lot when he's not working is how he can travel so quickly between shopping malls when he's on his tour, and the answer is Magic, of course, similar to the magical technology that allows Santa to fly around the world in one night.  There's some space-time-continuum mumbo-jumbo, timewarps and tesseracts and such, stuff we mortals will never understand.

But when you get on down to the brass tacks of HOW Santa travels, well.  This'll blow your mind.  Santa has a magic Airstream travel trailer that looks like just a regular Airstream travel-trailer from the outside, with LED Christmas lights strung on it.  He used to use those big C9 lightbulb lights, but Santa adapts to the changing times and says LEDs are the way to go!

The magic Airstream travel trailer is self-propelled and run by a sophisticated auto-piloting system, and is equipped with so much technology that it makes Air Force One look like a tinker-toy!  Hahaha!  It can either be used as a teleporter or a flying travel trailer, depending on the distance Santa needs to go, and how much time he has to get there.

He and Mrs. Claus travel by magic Airstream instead of teleporting back to the 'Pole every night after the malls close, because first of all, the Elves are more than adept at running things back at the Workshop for the month Santa's on his tour, and also because it takes a lot of magical energy to teleport all the way to the North Pole and back, and that would tire out the Clauses, so they stay right in the travel trailer.  While Santa's sitting on the Santa Throne at shopping malls across America, Mrs. Claus walks undercover through the mall to keep an eye on how the little kids' parents behave when they're out doing their Christmas shopping.  How about that?!

That Santa knows how to travel right!

But back to the magic Airstream travel trailer.  Like I said, from the outside, it looks like this little, unassuming travel trailer, but on the INSIDE, well, it's a mansion with a full compliment of domestic Elves, a chef, a lap pool, a sitting room with a fireplace, a personal trainer to help Santa stay cuddly but still fit, and a machine that makes the best hot cocoa you'll ever imagine!  It's five candy-cane accommodations, Friends!  There's a nerve center so the Clauses can keep in touch with the Elves back at the Pole, and when the Clauses want some down-time, they can get any television channel in the world on their Big TV.

When I asked Santa Claus how much a magic Airstream travel trailer like his would setcha back, he said there's no putting a price on his rig, since we mortals wouldn't be able to understand how to use the Airstream travel trailer or its magic, and we really don't need to, but he said that regular Airstream travel trailers can be found at numerous places, including eBay, and that they can be fixed up and turned out to be pretty luxurious on their own.  So I might talk to Mommy and Daddy about that one of these days.

So that's all for Santa and Mrs. Claus for right now, on their tour of the shopping malls across America.  If you want me to, I can ask Santa some of your questions, next time I talk to him, while Santa's on his tour.  Or if you have questions for Mrs. Claus, I can ask her something, too, just not when she's doing her undercover work, keeping an eye on parents!  Just leave me a comment with your question- I won't know what to ask, otherwise!

In the meantime, let yourself believe in some magic, Big People, just for this month.  It's okay to believe in some magic!  It really is!

Puttin' on the Ritz on the Tree!

I've experienced the magic of the Christmas Season!

 Hiya, Big People!  Happy Monday.  Or more to the point, Happy Monday after Thanksgiving to you!  Here in Pennsylvania, some of the schools are out because it's the first day of hunting season.  Mommy says that when I'm big enough and am off school, we might go shopping on Deer Season Day, if they still give it as vacation by then, because she says hunting for bargains at the mall is more fun and warmer than hunting for poor deer in the woods, and I believe her!  I really do!

I'm samplin' some COOKIES for the Christmas Season!

It's pretty magical, what's happened up here on the hill in the Bing.  On Thursday, it was warm and sunny and you could see the grass on the ground, and then it got cold the day after Thanksgiving, and over the weekend, it snowed!  It looks like a Frosted Mini-Wheat outside the window.  There's a song that it's a marshmallow world in the winter, but right now, it's just a Frosted Mini-Wheat world outside. Anyway, I understand that the Christmas Season kicks off on the Day After Thanksgiving, and I just thought it was so cool that all that snow magically appeared when it was the Christmas Season!

You know what doesn't just magically appear during the Christmas Season?  Our tree, all decorated up.  Apparently we hafta do that, and Mommy's been griping about it all weekend long.  You ought to hear her.  'Gripe, gripe, gripety-gripety-gripety, gripe!'  All about putting up and decorating our Christmas tree!

I said, "Mommy, why don't we just go out and cut down a Christmas tree from outside and decorate it up!"  And she grumbled that we can't have a tree cut down from outside, because the pine makes it hard for her to breathe and makes welts break out on her arms, and I said, "Well, that's just ridiculous!" 

When that tree's up, I'm gonna climb it!

We HAVE a Christmas tree, right up in the attic, I guess.  But Mommy has to bring it down, and put the lights on, and then put on decorations, but not glass ones, because I'm little, she says, and I might drop a glass ball on the floor and break it, or try eating the ornaments... what does Mommy think I am, a baby?  But okay, no glass ornaments this year.  That's fine!

I do think it's a little weird that we cut down trees from the outside and stick lights and ornaments on, or we bring trees down from our attics and stick lights and ornaments on.  You Big People have some weird holiday traditions.  But I'm here, and I'll go along with it.  And I remember our Christmas tree from last year, and it did kind of dress up our living room.  Made it feel ritzy and cozy.

You know what I'm gonna do, Friends, after we get that tree all put up today, and we get all the ritz on it?  I'm gonna try climbing up to the very tippy-top!  That's what I'm gonna do!

Major Eating Holiday Debriefing

Hmmm.  What should I eat next?

Well, Friends, I did it!  I got to participate in my first Major Eating Holiday!  It was pretty cool.  I liked it.  I had me some squash.  If you know me, you know I love squash!  And some stuffing, and mashed potatoes, and this weird stuff I've never had before called cranberry sauce.  It was like Jell-O, but not, and it was kind of sour but sweet.  I've never in my whole life encountered anything like it.  I pretty much like it.  I liked it cut up into little triangles and put on the tray of my high chair. 

I noticed there was cole slaw-slash-cabbage salad on the table.  I also noticed I didn't have any of that.  It's probably just as well.  I've heard what cabbage'll do to a body, and I didn't need any help in that department.  Not to be crass.  It's just a fact.  It's a fact, and we all do it, so don't be all prudish about me mentioning what cabbage and other vegetables such as beans, broccoli, and cauliflower do to a person.

Pumpkin pie: love at first bite, if you will.

Another pleasant surprise was my Crescent Roll that I got to have.  Big People, have you ever tried those?  Oh my goodness, they're right up there with those biscuits the Red Lobster brings out.  I really liked my Crescent roll!

Mommy tried to feed me like I'm some kind of baby or something, and I said, 'Hold it, there, Old Lady!  I'm a big girl, and I'm going to participate in this Major Eating Holiday as such!' and I fed myself with my own two hands!

We waited a little while for the pumpkin pie.  I've never had pumpkin pie in my whole life, and I got to have some pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving.  Mommy made them.  It was tasty!  I ate the middle all from my slice of pie and let Mommy have the crust.  I ate some of the crust.  It was good, as far as crust goes, but that's not where it's at for me, with the pumpkin pie.  I like the middle, and I like the whip up on top.  Yes.

This is good stuff, right here!

In the middle of all of it, after the feast and before the pumpkin pie, that darn Mommy thought I ought to take a nap.  How bogus is that?  (How'd you like my word 'bogus?' I understand it was the parlance of the cool kids back when Mommy was in school, which was a long time ago, but I'm gonna bring it back!  Bogus!  Naps are bogus!)  Anyway, I didn't want to take a nap, and I could hear everybody out in the living room, having fun and visiting, and I thought it was shabby of all of them not to stand up for me and tell that mean Mommy to come get me and bring me back out for the festivities.  I thought I was going to get a break from the nappage once, but it was only Mommy, bringing in Grampa's iPod, which had Beethoven's music playing on it.  I like Beethoven, and it was meant to distract me from my mission, which was to skip naptime in the afternoon.  It didn't work.  I screamed the whole time.  So there.

Other than all that, I had a blast during my first Major Eating Holiday that I got to participate in.  I hear this is an exciting time of the year, so I'm looking forward to seeing what kinds of things I can get into between now and New Year's.  

Happy Thanksgiving, Big People!

Is he putting bunny ears up behind my head?

 Hiya, Friends!  It's been a busy week, as evidenced by my absence from checking in with you this week.  But I wanted to make sure I stopped into my home on the World Wide Web to wish all my friends and friends-to-be a really, very, most definitely Happy Thanksgiving!

As you know, this is the first time I get to really participate in a Major Eating Holiday.  Last year, all I got to eat was Similac, because I wasn't even three months old on Thanksgiving, but this year, I'm fourteen months old, and I'm gonna have it all.  I'm going to split a turkey leg with Rozzie, and have some mashed potatoes, and squash, and green beans, and.... PUMPKIN PIE!  I cannot wait!

I also get to see my Aunt Colleen and Uncle Lorentz from all the way in Wexford.  It's always a good day when I get to see Aunt Colleen and Uncle Lorentz!  All the eating this Major Eating Holiday is just the icing on the cake, and you all KNOW how much I love cake.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving, Friends!

I have a lot of things to be thankful for, Friends, and I bet you do, too, even if it's not readily apparent.  The more I'm around here, the more I realize that as long as we get to get up in the morning and draw breath, that's a reason to be thankful.  That's a place to start!

I'll see you soon, Big People, especially starting regularly again on Monday.  In the meantime, I think we'll all be very busy with the Weekend Festivities, so if I don't see you very much over the weekend, please don't be alarmed, and don't think I quit.  I could never quit checking in with you, Friends!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Remember, today and always, Zoe loves you!  Muah!

Fwd: Not Just For Emails Anymore!

I used to hafta ride facin' backwards!

 Well, Friends, my whole life, I've been riding in the car, facing where I've been, instead of where I was going.  I didn't know any different, it kind of did bother me.  I couldn't help but notice that the Big People get to ride in the car facing forward, and it made me wonder what I was missing.

It wasn't all bad.  When Rozzie goes for rides with us, I would get to look at her.  She's fun to ride in the Jeep with.  Just seeing her face makes me smile!  But Rozzie doesn't ride with us ALL the time, so when she doesn't, I'm a little bored, facing the back of the Jeep!

At least I'd get to watch Rozzie sometimes!

I thought I'd be facing the back of the Jeep FOREVER!!!  Friday night, Mommy and Daddy went to Rochester to watch a hockey game, and they took me over to Gramma's.  And while I was riding along, facing the back of the Jeep, I said to myself, 'Self, we're going to hafta ask Mommy and Daddy to put something interesting on the back of this seat, like a picture of a disco ball or something, just anything more interesting than plain black leather. Especially when Rozzie's not along.

A strange and wonderful thing happened, though.  On Saturday, when Mommy and Daddy came to collect me at Gramma's, I got out to the Jeep, and whammo-blammo, wasn't my carseat facing a new direction: FORWARD!

I'll tell you what.  It was the most magical ride home ever!  I could swing my legs, and kick my feet and not hit anything like the back of the seat, and I could SEE!  Goodness, Big People, did you know the best view out of a car is out the windshield?  It's true! 

But I'm glad that like an email, I get to be forwarded now!

Yesterday, I got to ride to Daddy's office in Coudersport, and I couldn't help noticing that the sun didn't get in my eyes as much as it did when I had to ride backward.  Which is really a good thing, because with me riding facing forward in the car, the sun was brighter, and the sky was bluer.  It was a really good day!

What struck me the most, though, Friends, was how much I really felt like a Big Girl, getting to ride in the Jeep, facing forward.  It just seemed like the right thing to be doing.

"Forward" isn't just for emails now!  It's for Zoe!  And I couldn't be happier about it! Wheeeeeee!