Shelves Without Elves

No elves on my shelves! I prefer my shelves elfless!

Hiya, Friends! 

You know, it's the holiday season, and all you Grownups are tryin' to devise ways to keep Little Kids like me in line.  It's come to my attention that you've even enlisted the help of little spy-elves who station themselves on shelves in Little Kids' houses, and then trek back to the North Pole overnight to fill Santa Claus in on all the things the Little Kid does during the day.

I think this is a low-down, sneaky thing to do to a Little Kid, Big People!  Our lives are difficult enough, without having a little tattle-taling elf in our midst, filing a report every time we behave in sucha way that you Grownups deem unfit for the Holiday Season.

Also, it's a wee bit of a double standard, don'tchya think? 

Bear with me. 

Take complaining, for instance.  A Little Kid complaint would light up the Elf on a Shelf's tattling receptors and there'd be a report on the "bad" behavior filed so fast it'd make its little elvish head spin.  But what aboutchyoo Big People?  I don't suppose you EVER complain?

What about gettin' tired and bein' contrary.  Behavior such as this would have a Little Kid sent straight to time-out, and a report filed by the Elf on a Shelf.  But you Grownups never get tired and cranky and contrary and uncooperative?  Does anybody file reports on YOU with Santa Claus?

Nope! 

In the end, all we Little Kids want is to have our voices be heard.  We wanna be listened to.  Just like you.  We don't need a spying elf ratting us out to Santa Claus.  Besides, I think the Big Man at the North Pole understands us Little Kids a lot better than you think he does, and he certainly understands us a lot better than you Big People do, sometimes!  How about that?!

I am proud to say that my shelves will be without elves this holiday season!  I love ya just the same, though, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Ridin' the Rails on the Fun Train!

I'm an engineer on the Fun Train, Friends!  How about that?!  All aboard!

Hiya, Friends! 

Well, I guess ya know, with me being around all those trains recently, I've become something of a train enthusiast. 

In fact, I've become such a train enthusiast, I decided I'd become a train engineer.  This entailed my purchase of a train engineer costume from the gift shop at the Pennsylvania Railroad Museum, as well as a train whistle souvenir.  That part of the deal went splendidly, and now I'm a train engineer!

My train that I drive is called the Fun Train, although I did my apprenticeship on the Crazy Train.  That was a good time, but somebody else is already engineering the Crazy Train right now, and there's a deep waiting list to take over, so I decided I'd just go drive the Fun Train instead.  So far, it's working out great!

That just goes to show you, Friends, that if you have a dream, you should follow it.  That's how I live, and I think it works GREAT!  Hey.  I'd better get going.  The Fun Train is about to leave on an excursion, but I'll see ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

I Got All The Way to the Mall and...

Oh, good grief, I'm at the wrong mall!

Oh, Friends, what a day, WHAT A DAY!!! 

I decided to see what all the fuss about Black Friday shoppin' is all about and arranged to meet up with my other Little Kid Friends at the Mall.

I hopped in my Fancy Orange Convertible and ventured out to the Mall.  It was a really nice drive.  I put on the musics I like to listen to, and drove on the highway.  I've gotta say, as a highway driver, I'm pretty courteous.  I move over so other cars can merge in, I drive at a reasonable speed, and when it's my turn to use the on-ramp to merge into traffic, I do so with a quiet confidence.  Zoom! And away I go!

Needless to say, it's a pretty long drive to the Mall, but also needless to say, I make the best of long drives!

Well, here's what happened.  I got all the way to the Mall, and parked my fabulous orange convertible car at the Main Entrance parking lot, section A4, to be exact, because that's where my Little Kid Friends and I agreed to park, and...

My Little Kid Friends were nowhere to be found! 

Just about when I was startin' to panic, my cellular telephone rang.  It was my Little Kid Friends.  As it turns out, they were at another Mall, in the Main Entrance parking lot, section A4, and there was no me to be found...

I had driven all that way to the wrong mall, which was coincidentally two hours in the opposite direction from my house from the mall where my Little Kid Friends were waiting for me!  I coulda driven up to meet them, or they coulda driven over to meet me, but it woulda wasted even more of the whole day.

So they went shoppin' at the Mall where they met up, and I went shoppin' at the Mall where I ended up, and we sent each other pictures of the things we were shoppin' for.

And then I made some new Little Kid Friends outta the kids that were at the Mall I drove to.

You'd be surprised how many of us were supposed to be meetin' friends at The Mall, only to find we'd driven to the wrong Mall.  Isn't that something?!

There's always a bright side, Friendskies!  I'll see ya tomorrow! 
I love ya lots!  Muah!

Black-and-White Friday!

On a day like today, you've gotta get back to the Black and White Friday Basics!

Hiya, Big People! 

Didja survive the Major Eatin' Holiday yesterday? 

Didja get up in the middle of the night to get an early jump on the Major Shoppin' Holiday of today?

I didn't.  I do my shoppin' online.  Actually, I have people who do my shoppin' for me.  I'm that bigga deal!  Haha!

Anyway, while you Big People are celebratin' Black Friday, I'm celebratin' Black and White Friday.  All that means is that I'm havin' my picture taken in black and white today.  It's fun in an old-timey kinda way, but I hafta admit that I also feel so dignified. 

The car behind me is nice, to.  Someday, my Pink Pedal Car hopes to grow up to be as big and dignified as this car I'm with.

Have fun out there, Friends!  Get your feet into some comfy shoes, take regular breaks to hydrate nad rest, and do Black Friday right if you're gonna do it!  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Happy Thanksgiving to You!

Give thanks for all the things that make ya smile... like ICE CREAM CONES!

Hiya, Big People! 

Hey. 

Today's Thanksgiving Day, and I'm plannin' on watching Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on the television, here in a little bit, and then goin' to Gramma's to have turkey and pie and an assortment of side dishes, but first, I wanted to drop in on ya and say Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope ya know it every day, but I'd better tell ya today, especially, since it's Thanksgiving, and all, when I give thanks for all the things that make me smile, you're on toppa my list, Big People.  Well, you and ice cream cones.  And cupcakes.  All those things, as well as you, Friends.  That's the toppa my list of things that make me smile that I'm thankful for. 

So have a wonderful Thanksgiving, Friends!  I love ya lots, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Strikin' Out on Strikin' Up a Friendship!

Peter Stonewall and I aren't speaking currently.

Friends, remember what I said yesterday about how you could strike up conversations and friendships on the train?  Remember how I said that, and how wonderful I thought that woulda been?

Well, as it turns out, not everybody ya meet around trains is wanting to strike up conversation and friendship.

Take, for instance, the case of Mr. Peter Stonewall, pictured with me in today's picture.  Mr. Peter Stonewall looked like he was a lonely fella, so I marched up to him and said "Hiya!  I'm Zoe, and I'm four!  I'd like to be your friend!"  And do ya know what Mr. Stonewall said back to me?  Nothing.  In fact, he just kept a stony glare on his face, the whole time I was tryin' to be friendly.

In fact, I don't even know what his real name is.  I thought Peter Stonewall was a fitting name for this fella, since talkin' to him was like trying to talk to a stone wall.  The whole experience left me feelin' frusterated and my feelings were hurt, but I got to buy an ice cream from a real, honest-to-goodness ice cream truck that was outside the museum, so that made me feel a little better.

Hey.  I'll see YOU tomorrow, Big People.  I love ya lots.  Muah!

A Kind of Train I Can Support!

Steam trains are trains that I really like!

Friends, if you've been followin' along with me for any amount of time, you'll know that I like certain kinds of train better than I like other kinds of train.

For instance, I don't like the "potty train."  All that train has ever brought me is tears and frustration and the occasional sticker or Skittle, but once it seems like I'm gettin' the hang of it, the stickers and Skittles stop coming my way, so I've gotta mess up so Mommy will reward me again for my efforts at learning.  And the trick is I've gotta make it look like it's an accident.

That's neither here nor there for this post, though.

Recently, I visited a museum where they have a whole buncha trains.  The trains are just beautiful, and what really wowed me is that those trains used to roam wild on tracks, throughout the land! And they stopped in every little town!  Why, you could get on the train in Elmer or Mills or Lewisville, say, and ride that train pertineer anywhere you wanted to go!  All you needed was a train ticket... no driver's license necessary! 

You can see why such an arrangement would be attractive to a Little Kid such as myself.

Also, on the train, there'd be a whole buncha other people ridin' the train to pertineer anywhere they wanted to go.  Could you imagine the conversations and friendships you could strike up on a train?

Friends, I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow! Muah!