Me and Beebster!

We've got some Little Giraffes to go rescue, Beebster!

Hiya, Friends!  Happy Monday!

Well, ya know, I'm an adventurous Little Kid, always up for an adventure, and today's no exception!

Today, my adventuring is taking me to rescue a herd of Little Giraffes, location known only to me, my pal BB-8, and the Little Giraffes who are in need of rescuing, of course.  The Beebster and I are flying in my Magnificent Flying Machine to get to those Little Giraffes. 

BB-8 is pretty much the perfect partner in a Little Giraffe rescue mission, on account of him bein' really smart, and good at navigating, and also when we get to the Little Giraffes, BB-8 can get 'em on my Magnificent Flying Machine without scarin' 'em, since he just looks like a huggable fella.  Also, BB-8 has been on all kinds of more dangerous adventures long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away, so herding up a buncha frightened Little Giraffes and helpin' me get 'em to safety is gonna seem like a piece of cake to BB-8.

Friends, I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, but BB-8 has spotted our Little Giraffes who need rescuing, so it's all about to get real here.  I better go.  I'll see ya tomorrow, though!  You bet!

I love ya lots!  Muah!

Spring Is Here!

I'm really looking forward to going to the Lake House in August, though.

Hiya, Big People!  Happy Sunday to ya!

So!  How's it going?

 It's been brought to my attention that Spring is finally here, so that's something to smile about!

Thing of it is, it's kind of felt like Spring all winter, really, if you think about it.  So it's no big patoot that now it's officially Spring, you know?  Not to me.

This kid's already thinkin' ahead to summertime, and goin' to the Lake House.  I keep talkin' about the Lake House, because I CANNOT WAIT!!!!, and Mommy says, "Cool it, Zoe!  We have so many fun things we gotta do between now and when we go to the Lake House, that you'll just be fast-forwarding through them and wishing away your time!  Don't do that!"

Well, her tellin' me not to do that just makes me wanna do it, you know?  I wanna ride in the kayak.  I wanna squirt with the squirt-guns.  I finally get my own room this year.  I can't wait for that.  I'm gonna be seein' the Lake from a new venue.  I can't wait for that, either. 

Tellin' a kid to cool it on lookin' forward to something like the Lake House.  Boy, sometimes, I wonder if my mother ever was a Little Kid.

Anyways, it's Springtime!  Wahoo!  Time to go out on my Swing and Slide!  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Fancy or Smarty?

Sometimes I don't know whether to put on my fancy pants or my smarty pants!

Hiya, Big People!  Happy Saturday to you!  Are ya keepin' Ms. Rubble away?  I sure am!

Well, ya know,  I'm a kid with lots of options every day.  Lotsa choices.  One of the most important choices I make every day, one of the choices that is most influential in the way my day goes, is the kind of pants I put on in the morning.

Usually, there's two different kinds of pants for me to choose from: smarty or fancy.

Now, when I wear my fancy pants, generally, I don't get spoken to as sharply as when I wear smarty pants.  I notice that when I'm wearin' smarty pants, people tend to have a shorter fuse with me, for some reason beyond my understanding, comprehension, and control. 

In light of this, you'd think it would be a no-brainer.  You'd think that I'd automatically choose to wear fancy pants every single day, to avoid the short-fusedness that results when I don my smarty pants.  Thingofitis, even the fancy pants have a downside: when I wear my fancy-pants, sometimes things feel overly complicated. 

A kid can't win. 

But you know what?  Wearin' my fancy pants and my smarty pants makes ME happy, and that's where I'm gonna choose from.  The space that's best for me, not the space where I find out what other people think.  You know?  I have no control over what other people think or feel.  I'm not even in control of whether or not other people even like me.  So I might just as well do things that make ME happy, and people can either be on board with it, or they can go see their own Ms. Rubble.  It's not my patoot to worry about it.

In case you're wonderin' which pants I have on today, Friends, I'm wearin' a rare pair of Fancy Smarty Pants.  How the heck right about that?!

Anyways, I love ya lots, Friends!  And I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Ms. Rubble

When I don't get enough sleep, I am Ms. Rubble!

Hiya, Friends!  Happy Friday to ya! 

Hey, I know this is a strange topic to talk about on a Friday, especially when I'm so darn smiley, but you know what?  The time to talk about fire safety is not when the living room's on fire, so the time to talk about Ms. Rubble isn't when I'm overtired and cranky.

That's right.  Usually, I am your sunny pal Zoe.  I'm agreeable, sweet, super-thoughtful, fun, and sparkly.  I mean, you know me, right, Big People?

However, when I'm tired and cranky, or a little sick, or a combination of lotsa things like cranky, overtired, sick, hungry, and just plain stubborn, I turn into Ms. Rubble.  And when I'm Ms. Rubble, nothing is ever right.  Nothing is ever gonna make me happy.

You'd recognize Ms. Rubble, Friends, from the screechiness my voice takes on.  Even I can hear this in my own ears, and I'll say to myself, 'Self, it isn't worth it to get all screechy and whiny and teary over gettin' ice cream in a dish insteadda in a cone.'  I really say things like that to myself.  But once Ms. Rubble's dug in her heels, which are crammed into pinchy, too-tight shoes that make her feet all blistery, I need outside intervention to make her go away.  When Ms. Rubble's in control, I sure as heck don't like it when my Big People try to intervene, either, I'll tell ya what.  I know they're just tryin' to help me...Zoe, but Ms. Rubble sees 'em as attackin' her, and she goes on the offensive.  Because when Ms. Rubble's in control, Ms. Rubble's in control, and there's no stoppin' her.

Usually a nap, as much as I hate to admit it, helps send Ms. Rubble on her way.  Cuddles help, too.  Sometimes, there's gotta be a Big Blowup to put Ms. Rubble in her place.  I'm always kind of relieved to see her go.  I'm not gonna lie to you.

Anyways, Friends, we all have our Ms. Rubble.  The best we can do is acknowledge her when she shows up, and try to schushel her off as soon as possible. 

I love ya lots, Friends, and I'll see ya tomorrow! Muah!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Just you try and pinch me!

Hiya, Big People Friends!  Happy Thursday to you, but more importantly, Happy St. Patrick's Day! 

As you know, on St. Patrick's Day, you're supposedta wear green, otherwise the leprechauns will come along and pinch ya. 

I have taken all precaution against bein' pinched on today, St. Patrick's Day.  You bet I have.  Not only am I wearin' my green Thursday underwear, I'm also wearin' green pants and a green shirt.  I've been eatin' lots of greens like broccoli and spinach and cabbage.  I've even been thinkin' green, by planning recycling strategies for the things I use around the house.

I am green inside and out on this St. Patrick's Day, but if that still isn't enough for the pinching-prone leprechauns, Big People, I am also carrying a sword today.

Oh, don't look at me like that.  I'm not going to sword the leprechauns!  That's not what I'm all about!  How could you think that?  Anyways, it's a plastic sword, so the most I could do to the leprechauns who'd wanna unlawfully pinch me is maybe leave a red mark, or if I swung like I really meant it, hit a homerun with 'em, or possibly raise a welt. 

It's the idea that I have a sword and a fearsome look on my face today that's really the take-home point of all this, Big People. 

I'm not to be pinched today.  No way.  I hope you're not to be pinched today, either.

I'll see ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Springtime!

Spring is neither early nor late, but precisely on time, Friends!

Hiya, Big People!  Happy Wednesday to ya!

Well, ya know, back in February, on Groundhog Day, Punxsutawney Phil said we'd have an early Spring, and the Weather Woodchuck here in the Bing said Spring would get here when it wants to, and please will we shut the door to his den on our way out so he could get some more sleep.

And here we are, on March the Sixteenth.  I think we're pretty much turnin' the tides to Springtime.  I mean, yeah, of course it'll get warm and cold and warm and cold a couple-three times before it's all the way Spring, but I'd say Punxsutawney Phil and Weather Woodchuck deserve a job well done.

How about that, Friends?

Spring's a comin', Big People!  Get your gardenin' gloves and sunhat ready, 'cause we'll have work to do!

I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Betty Botter Bought Some Bettercreme

But, she said, this Bettercreme's bitter...

Hiya, Big People!  Happy Ides of March to you!  Besides "bewaring" the Ides of March, I have another thing Billy Shakespeare would be tellin' us to beware, if he'd been around to experience it for himself, and that is Bettercreme frosting colored with red food colorings.

You see, Bettercreme frosting is already kind of a letdown, all on its own.  You see it, and it's this fluffy mound of frosting, and you think that if it's Buttercreme, it's gonna be just heavenly.  You get your mouth all set for the cloud-like, just-sweet-enough buttery goodness that is Buttercreme frosting, and then you sink your teeth in and find... nope.  Bettercreme. 

Quite often, Bettercreme is too sweet, insteadda bein' just-sweet-enough.  It doesn't have a buttery good taste, on accounta it's either made with fake butter or Crisco.  It makes the inside of your mouth all greasy.  I think they make it too sweet, on accounta they way they want it to look all nicey fluffy, like real Buttercreme, but real Buttercreme melts different from Bettercreme, and that messes with the flavor.  So they dump a lotta sugar in to make up for it.  Anyway, that's how Bettercreme is already a disappointment unto itself, when ya thought you were gettin' a cupcake piled high with heavenly Buttercreme.

Then add in some red or pink food coloring into the mix, Friends.  From what I've gathered from what Mommy has to say, red food coloring made everything it was added to taste bitter and medicine-like when she was a kid, and it looks like someday Far Into the Future, I'll be tellin' my own Little Kid that red food coloring made everything it was added to taste bitter and medicine-like when I was a kid.  The more things change, the more they stay the same.

I think I could accept the red food color taste more cheerfully, if it accompanied actual Buttercreme frosting.  Unfortunately for me, the cupcake I'm not really enjoying in the picture for today was piled high with pink food-colored Bettercreme icing, so it was just a bitter, greasy mess all up on toppa that otherwise beautiful cupcake. 

If they'd'a had cupcakes frosted with pink Bettercreme frosting in William Shakespeare's day, you betchya he woulda written a play about it, and that play woulda been a tragedy. 

The way I handled that awful Bettercreme is that I just scraped it off and ate the cupcake plain. Because I do NOT waste a good cupcake, no matter how unfortunately it's frosted. 

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!