Appropriate Table Talk with Zoe

I see nothing wrong with talking boogies during dinner!

Hiya, friends!  Hey, didja know that there's sucha thing as appropriate things to talk about at the table, and inappropriate things to talk about at the table? 

Did you know that?  Because it's kind of new to me!

You see, once I started talking, I mean really speaking Big People insteadda Babese, it just sorta took off, and I learned I could conversate and palaver about anything under the sun. 

It was an exciting time for me, Friends, the first time I could carry on a real conversation. It's been so exciting, talking about shoes I see other people wearing, that I like, so I'll yell out across a room 'Hey!  I loooooove your sneakers!"  Or if I see a cute puppy being walked, I'll point to it and say loud enough for everybody to hear 'That's a cute puppy!'  Or if I'm wearin' an especially cute dress or clippies, or if I'm havin' an exceptionally great hair day, I'll say right to a Big Person, "See my dress [clippies] [hair]?!" 

What do you MEAN some people might be offended?!

You could accuse me of making a blatant grab for the attention of the grownups around me.  You could accuse me of that, but honestly, Friends... give me a break.  I'm two.  Of course, everything I do is a blatant grab for attention.  Who doesn't like to be noticed? 

Don't judge.

So the other day, I was havin' supper with Mommy and Daddy at the table, and I had a boogie.  I took care of it myself, but then I needed to get rid of it, so I announced 'Mah-meee!  I have a boogie!  Look!  It's on my fingah!'

Friends, you wouldn't believe the dirty look Mommy gave me.  It would fall into the "ultra-dirty look" category of dirty looks. 

"Okay," she said, grabbing the paper towels and taking away the boogie on my finger.  "That's disgusting.  Let's go wash your hands."

I stand corrected, and I sincerely apologize for grossing anybody out.

I went with Mommy to wash my hands, and when I came back to the table, I wanted to make sure Daddy knew that I'd vanquished the Boogie Menace.  I mean, it was nothing short of heroic on my part, and I wanted my recognition, darn it!  Remember?!  I'm two!

Well, as though they were never little kids themselves, Mommy and Daddy started hushing me when I'd bring up the boogie.  They'd try to change the subject by asking me about the Daniel Tiger I saw on the television that day.  They'd say 'that's gross.'

Friends, what I don't understand is why Mommy and Daddy got so hoity-toity over the whole thing when everybody gets boogies.  I just don't see why I shouldn't be able to talk about it!

Well, I guess boogies are one of those things that you don't talk about, least of all at the table.  I guess some people can get offended  by such talk.  I didn't know that before, but now I know, and I'm gonna try to table better in the future. 

I just thought that was interesting to pass along, Friends, that I've learned that not everything is an excellent table-topic.  I learn something new, every day.

All right, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I'll try to keep it appropriate!  Muah!