It's Saturday Again!

Hooray for Saturdays, Friends!

Hiya, Friends!  If I look happy in the picture below, it's because I'm thrilled to pieces that it's Saturday again!  Next week's gonna be another Busy Week, but today's Saturday, and while it's kinda busy, it's all gonna be okay.  I know it is. 

How about you?  Do you have any plans?  I'm going to a party this afternoon for a graduate.  And I think there'll be some gardening in our day.  I'm kinda ambivalent about the garden.  I really am.  I wanna dig in the dirt wherever I want, but Mommy's always yelling at me to watch where I'm stepping, and to stop digging up the things she's planted.

The real kicker came the other day, though.  We learned it's possible to overfertilize tomato plants.  I'll have to keep ya posted on how that particular thing turns out.

Over all, it was kind of an emotional and turbulent week here.  We're all okay.  Nothing traumatic.  Just lotsa lessons learned.  Lotsa tears shed, from me and Mommy, both. 

I think we'll look back on this last week and call it the Week We Learned A Lot From Our Mistakes.  Because I think we did.  Mommy and I were making mistakes left and right.  Oh, boy were we ever makin' mistakes...

Anyway, all will be well.

I won't keep ya long today, Friends!  I just wanted to peek in on ya so we could both give Saturday a big shout-out.  I love ya, Friends, and I'll see ya tomorrow for my five-hundredth post!  Muah!

Happy National Donut Day!

Hey, Rozzie!  Wanna go to Donut Dude's with me?  Let's go!

Hiya, Friends!  Today's the first Friday in June.  Do you know what that means?  It's National Donut Day! 

Just yesterday, I was wishin' for a holiday here in June, and today I woke up and it came true! 

How about that?!

You know how much I love donuts, too, Friends, so this is just the trifecta of fabulousness for me.  It's Friday, it's a holiday, and it's National Donut Day! 

Don't let me hold ya up, Friends!  Get to your favorite donut place ASAP and enjoy yourself some donuts!  My friends and I are on our way to see Donut Dude.

Eat responsibly!  Hahahahaha!  I'll see ya tomorrow, Friends!  I love ya a lot!  Muah!

Happy Cinco de Juno!

I need a holiday fix.  A Holifix ™, if you will, Friends.

Friends, as you know, the month of May was full of festive festivities.  Now May is over and we're into June.  Actually, we're on June the Fifth, and I can't help but notice the lack of holidays here at the beginning of the sixth month of the year.

Think about it.  By the time we got to the fifth of May, we'd already enjoyed May Day and May the Fourth Be With You day.  And then Cinco de Mayo.

Today IS Cinco de Juno, so why aren't there any festivities to participate in?  I feel like there should be festive eats.  I feel as though there should be a pinata, at the very least.

I think what I'm saying is that I'd like a pinata of my very own.  Pinatas are excellent stress relief, because you beat 'em and beat 'em and beat 'em with a stick, and then candy and treats fall out.  If that isn't stress relief, I don't know what is, by golly!

What's that? ...  You're wondering what kind of stress a two and a half year-old can possibly be feeling?  Well, I'll tell ya, Friends.  There's the constant battle between me and Mommy about naptime.  That's the appetizer course.  Then there's all the questions I face on any given day.  Zoe, what color is this?  Zoe, what letter is this?  Zoe, why did you put your peanut butter sandwich in the couch?  The couch doesn't eat peanut butter sandwiches!

I'll tell ya why.  Because I got tired of eating the peanut butter sandwich, and the couch was a convenient hidey-hole, or so I thought!  That's why!  Geeze!

And then there's my favorite stressor: "Zoe, when are you gonna learn to use the potty?"

Oh. My. Good-n-Plentys, Friends.  I get so sick of hearin' that question that I'd love to have a Tshirt printed up for myself that says "I'm gonna learn to use the potty beginning at never o'clock on the eleventy-second of Mindyourownbusinessuary."  But that's a lot of letters to put on a 2T Tshirt.  I could probably size up to 3T, but I bet they'd still hafta print the shirt using maybe about a size 25 font, which is big on a page, but little teeny-tiny on a Tshirt, even a 2T or 3T Tshirt.

So that's why I get stressed out, Friends.  That's what has me on edge and wanting to beat a pinata with a stick and have candy fall out of it for my efforts.  That's why I want so desperately for today to be Cinco de Juno.  Friends.

So let's make it so.  Happy Cinco de Juno to you, Friends!  I'll see you tomorrow!  Muah!

If Cornmeal Muffins Are Made With Corn...

It's important to know what your food's made from, Friends!

Hiya, Friends!  Yesterday I went on an expedition with Mommy to the Wegmans and we came home with a package of English Muffins, and it got me to wondering...

Cornmeal muffins are made of cornmeal, blueberry muffins have blueberries in them, chocolate chip muffins have chocolate chips in 'em, apple strudel muffins can boast both apples and strudel among their ingredients, so what makes me feel uneasy about these English muffins is this:

What do they make English muffins out of?  I'm asking, especially because the Amish call us normals "the English," and, well...

I don't even wanna go there, Friends.  I do not even wanna go there.  English muffins are just too delicious for me to spoil with thoughts like this.  I am going to try to derail my very own train of thought, if this is the track it's gonna wanna hafta take me down, by golly!

But seriously, Friends, why are they called "English muffins" when they don't really look like muffins, and they don't appear to have "the English," or English class or anything like that in 'em?   Did they just pull the name at random from one of those big drums they use for 50-50 raffle drawings?

I'm gonna be cautious, just until I find out for sure, Friends.  It's important to know what your food's made from!

I love ya lots!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

The Curious Case of S. Cargo

You're pulling my leg.  People don't eat snails, do they?

Friends, I have another Lerbert the Lobster situation on my hands.  Recently, I was acquainted with a snail named S. Cargo. 

I couldn't help but notice that S. Cargo carries his house around on his back, and I thought that was fascinating, so I came home and looked it up in my Big Board Book of Snails board book, and as it turns out, snails DO carry their houses around on their backs.  Kind of like an organic Airstream travel trailer.

I'd love an Airstream travel trailer for day trips, Friends.  I love the idea of carryin' around all the comforts of home, wherever I go!

But that isn't the Lerbert situation of all this with my friend S. Cargo.  As it turns out, people EAT snails!  What?  What is that all about?  You Big People will eat just about anything, won't you?  Won't you???

What makes matters worse is that even though I know snails like S. Cargo are going to be eaten, I just can't bring myself to beg Mommy and Daddy for a snail tank of my very own.  I feel bad for those snails and all, but I just can't see myself striking up any rapport with a snail.  Lobsters, they have personality.  Snails, though...

I don't know, Friends.  I think I'm gonna hafta wanna just put it in my left pocket that people eat snails and pay lotsa good money to do so.  I'll just imagine my friend S. Cargo as a happy traveling snail, and not think about the dark truth.  If that makes me a denier, so be it.  I can't help those snails.

You know what I can help, though?  Little Giraffes.  I betchya thought I'd forgotten all about my work with the Little Giraffes.  I have not.  I just don't talk about it all the time, because I was gettin' complaints about havin' a one-track mind.

See ya tomorrow, Friends! Don't eat any snails today, mmmmmkay?  Maybe that's how I can help S. Cargo, even though he didn't ask me for help or behave as though he particularly cared that I was talking to him.  Be kind and don't eat any snails today, just the same, mmmmkay?  Love ya lots!  Muah!

Marvelous Monday!

Decide to make Monday Marvelous!

Hiya, Friends!  I know today's Monday, and a normal Monday, not a Holiday Monday like last Monday was, but it's all gonna be okay, Big People.  You wanna know how I know it is? 

Because we can decide to make Monday however we want it to be.  You know how I want MY Monday to be? 

Marvelous, Friends!  I want my Monday to be Marvelous, and I'm gonna make it so. 

You can, too.  How?  You do what you hafta do in order to make yourself feel as great as possible.  As for me, I put on an extra-snappy outfit today.  Got out my Sparkly Sunglasses.  I had Mommy do my hair in an extra-cute style.  I put on my sassy pants and my sensational shoes.

No matter what Monday throws my way, I'm ready for it.  I'm gonna make it a marvelous day, you bet I am!

You do what you need to do to feel  your best today, Friends.  You own this Monday.  No.  You're gonna make this Monday marvelous!

Go get 'em, Friends!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sunday Driver!

I am proudly a Sunday Driver, Friends!  See ya!  Beep-beep!

Hiya, Friends!  Hey, if you know me, you know I LOVE cars!  And Sundays are set aside for cars and drivers.  The people who drive on Sundays even have a special name: They're called Sunday Drivers!

Friends, I am proud to be a Sunday Driver.  I guess in the technical sense, I'm a Future Sunday Driver, because I'm not old enough to have a real driver's license yet.

Whatever.

That technicality won't stop me from being a proud Sunday Rider.  How about THAT, Grown-Up Rule-Makers?  I don't need a license to enjoy RIDING in neat cars on Sundays!  So that's what I'm gonna do today!

And while I'm ridin' in my car, I'm dreaming of the day I get to DRIVE the nice cars!  How about that?

Friends, I've gotta go.  My car's about to leave.  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!