Sunday, May 31, 2015

This MAY Be the End (Of May)

I hope there's lotsa ice cream and popcorn in store for me in the Month of June!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Sunday to you!

Well, it looks as though we've reached the End of the Month of May, and tomorrow when we wake up, it'll be June. 

June, June, June.

The first montha summer. 

Friends, am I alone in feeling like we just got here in May?  I feel like we just flipped the calendars over from April.  This is a really weird paradox, because May is one of the longest months of the year. 

Well, it is, too.  Think about it.  We have February, that little shorty, weighing in at twenty-eight days.  Twenty-nine if it's Leap Year.  Big whoop.  Then the months of April, June, September, and November contain thirty days each, as per that lousy poem that starts out all promising with rhyme and meter and then just unravels to a palavering about the number of days in each month, very nearly as prosey as the paragraph you're reading right now.

Anyways, the months that contain thirty-one days- January, March, MAY, July, August, October, and December.  That's seven out of the twelve.  And May's one of 'em.  Yet, May flew by faster than the short little month of February this year.

You know what I think it is, Big People?  It was an unusually nice month, weather-wise, this May.  Just about every day was just a Chamber of Commerce Weather-day, practically tailor-made for some kinda brochure.  It's so much easier to enjoy life when the weather's nice, and you don't hafta worry about your cheeks freezing solid if you go outside. ... What's that? ... Oh, Big Person, I'm talkin' about either setta cheeks freezing solid.  It was cold this last winter.  I almost felt like I was living inside Little House on the Prairie or something, with the fierce winter.

But tomorrow's June.  I wonder what June has in store for us, Friends.  I hope it's gonna be a good one, all the way around.  I'll see you there, bright-n-early, mmmkay?  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Saturday, May 30, 2015

The Allergizer Bunny

This can stop any time now, and I'd be fine with that.
Hiya, Friends!

Boy, I'll tell ya what.  I'm havin' a devil of a time with the dang ol' allergies this year!  Sneezin', eyes itchin', that weird feeling in my nose, like there's little crawlies crawling around up in it...

I know I say this every Spring, Big People, but I think the allergies are worse this year than they ever have been, thus far during my tenure here on Earth.  At least I'm noticing them more, anyway.

I realize this might be bold for me to declare this, but I think I'm the Allergizer Bunny.  I just keep sneezing and sneezing and sneezing.  No end in sight.  Other people have it rougher than I do, with Allergy Season.  I know that.  But I am not them, and I know only my own suffering, and it's just awful.  That's why I'm complaining so much about it. 

Sure, I could put myself in someone else's Kleenex box and realize that I don't have it so bad during Allergy Season.  I don't hafta go get shots, for instance, and there are so many who do, just to get through these pollen-filled days.  I could do that, but I'm not gonna.  I'm three, and these allergies are the WORST I've had, and I'm just not very big on empathy today.

Sorry.  That's the pollen talking.  It's hard to be civil when you feel like you've got little bugs crawling around up your nose and inside your eyes.  I think I'd better look up on the Internet any remedies I can find for this allergic scourge.  I'll be back and friendlier tomorrow, let's all hope. 

I love ya lots!  Muah!

Friday, May 29, 2015

Five To Nine!

It's Five To Nine!  Twice today!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Friday!

Hey, you know what?  I just love dates that sound like they're a sentence.  Today, for instance.  Today is May Twenty-Ninth, which sounds a little like an incomplete thought expressed as a sentence said out loud, which is actually a pet-peeve of mine, but if you say it the numbery way, that makes today "Five Two Nine," or its soundalike twin "Five to Nine!"

Granted, this is not a whole sentence in itself, on accounta there's no verb in there to verbify it, but you can still answer a question with it. 


"Hey, Zoe!" you say.  "What the heck time is it?"

I consult my Judy Clock, which happens to have the big hand on the eleven and the little hand pointing almost right at the nine.  I know there's five minutes between the eleven and the twelve on the Judy Clock, and that it's almost nine-o-clock.

"Why, it's FIVE TO NINE!" I reply, triumphantly!"

That's what it's all about, Friends!  Findin' a way to make May Twenty-Ninth a heckofalotof fun!  This is my way!  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Thursday, May 28, 2015

Styled Like Zoe

My hair ornament is making a statement... I don't know what it's saying, but it's BIG!
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, ya know, sometimes, I like to wear what stylists call 'statement pieces.'  Usually, my statement pieces are hair ornaments.  When it comes to hair ornaments, my motto is 'Go Big or Go Home!' even when I'm home. 

Yep, I love the dang ol' big hair ornaments. 

Statement necklaces aren't always practical, and neither are statement bracelets.  Think about it, Friends!  How many times have you been right in the middla something really important, and ya get distracted by your statement necklace or your statement bracelet?  Same goes for statement earrings.

You know what I think big statement earrings say?  "I have earlobes of STEEL!"  That's what they're saying!

So that leaves statement hair ornaments, Friends.  In my opinion, statement hair ornaments are the best, because you wear 'em up on toppa your head, where they won't get in the way, but they're also unmissable by everyone around you.  And honestly, what's the pointa makin' a statement if nobody sees it or hears it?  There is no point!  Ha!  It was a trick question!  How about that?!

So now you know another secret to stylin' yourself like your pal Zoe- ALWAYS wear a statement piece, and hair ornaments are the BEST for this sort of thing, I think!  Pair it up with a smile, and you can't lose!  You just can't! 

Hey.  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

My Friends

The best laughter is the laughter shared with your best friend!
Hiya, Friends! 

If ya know me very well, you know that my best friend is a dog named Rozzie.  Rozzie's been my friend for my whole entire life.  Maybe even longer.  I think I could hear Rozzie's voice, even before I was born.  When I think of every day of my life so far, Rozzie's always there.  I just love her big, furry white face, and her big voice.

You know, just like any friend, Rozzie and I have our differences.  It's inevitable.  We're two girls with very big personalities.  Rozzie also has big teeth, so I quite often defer to her, and sometimes that rubs me the wrong way.  But when push comes to shove, I'll stand up for that dog, no matter what, and she stands up for me.  When Mommy yells at me for doin' fun stuff, because Mommy hates fun, that Rozzie-dog yells right back at her.

So Rozzie and I are the best of friends.  I love that white dog!  And I've gotta say, some of the best laughs I've had have been with Rozzie.  She really makes me world brighter!

So do you, Big People.  I'm so glad you've stopped in to see me today.  I'll be back tomorrow, too.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Back to Business!

Who says ya can't be smart AND pretty?!
Hiya, Big People!

How was your Memorial Day Weekend?

Well, I'll tell ya what.  I just had a blast.  Yesterday, I got to attend my very first Memorial Day ceremony at the Ulysses Cemetery.  It made me proud to be an American and made me determined to not take my freedoms for granted.

There were lotsa picnics for me to go to.  I got to eat lotsa really good food.  Had some marshmellas.  Even though all my Big People like to roast theirs, I like to eat mine plain, and that worked out just fine.

I got to drive my Model Z around for a bit, and by drive it around, I mean I sat on the patio in my Model Z at Gramma's and let all the Big People tell me how cute I am, sittin' in the driver's seat. 

I'll tell ya what, that Model Z sure is hard to pedal.  I appreciate modern Power Wheelz even more than I used to, but you know what?  Once I get the pedallin' muscles in my legs all biggified, that Model Z of mine is really gonna tear around!  That's my prediction.

Today, though, it's all about bein' Back To Work.  I'm braiding my pal Barbara Doll's hair for her work as a theoretical physicist at a major university.  I'm gettin' ready to head back to St. Laffalotatus- Mercy-Mercy Hospital and Donut Dude's.  I do lotsa jobs.  And the weekend was fun, but now it's time to roll up our sleeves and get back at the ol' grind, right?

I love ya lots, Friends, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, May 25, 2015

What America Means To Me

America is tops!
Hiya, Friends!  Today is Memorial Day, and I hope everyone takes time to reflect and remember those who served and paid the ultimate price for all the freedoms we enjoy here in America.  Freedom isn't free. 

Like what?

Well, like lotsa things, Friends.  I know we Americans can be kind of a whiny buncha whiners sometimes, and that really isn't cool.  It's human nature, but it really isn't cool.  Let's take a little minute and count our blessings, mmmmkay, Big People?

Here in America, we're all created equal.  That doesn't mean that we all have the same, or equal abilities, or that we all get treated the same.  What it means, to me, at least, is that we all have the potential to rise above where we're born and become whatever we wanna be.  This wasn't the case when our Constitution was written.  The class-structure was very rigid, so if you were a little boy in Colonial America, and your father was a cobbler, you were probably going to turn out to be a cobbler, too.  You probably weren't gonna just magically become the most powerful merchant in all the Americas. 

Unless you left your cobbler's bench and became a pirate.  I could see some upward mobility if you became a pirate, because pirates just take what they want.  Probably much like the landed nobility did, which was how they got to be landed nobility.  They got out their swords, took what they wanted, and convinced the masses that they were Less, somehow, and that they lived to serve the landed nobility.

And if you were a little girl, you didn't even have those choices available to you, if one is to believe what one reads in the history books.

In America, boys and girls alike get to go to school and learn things.  Math and science and languages and music and art... so many things we get to learn.  We get grumpy about havin' to go to school, sure, but it's a really big deal that we have all this learning available to us.  For free, even!

In America, we get to expect that we're going to be safe.  I mean, there are dangerous places anywhere you'd go, but mostly in America, the norm is that you can expect to cross the street to pick up your mail without a band of robbers robbing you.

We pretty much have access to good food and clean, safe drinking water, here in America.  The basic-est of the basics.  Some places in the world, they can't say that.  Water's scarce and food's scarcer. 

We have heat, and lights, and running water, and lotsa books to read, and the education available to help us learn to read 'em, Friends. 

We have it pretty great, here in America, Friends.  And there are men and women who go away from their own families to risk their lives day-in and day-out, to keep America the great place that it is, even if we at home don't always appreciate it.  Even if we at home don't always appreciate them. 

Some of them don't come home, and they're the ones we remember today.  Reverently.

But I still think that if ya see a veteran today, tell 'em thank you, even if they don't think they deserve to hear the thanks because they came home, and those we're remembering today didn't.  They deserve to be told thank you, whenever we get a chance.  The ones who do get to come home don't come home the same as they were when they left.  They all deserve our thanks, because America is a great place... because of them.

Just, could we stop using the phrase "Happy Memorial Day?"  That kind of messes up the whole point.  Memorial Day isn't "happy."  But we can wish each other a "Good Memorial Day."  "Have a good Memorial Day," we can say.  I like that.

Have a good Memorial Day, Friends, and tell a veteran 'thank you,' if you see one today.  Even if they don't wanna hear the thanks.  They deserve thanks.  Be respectful at the Memorial Day services you attend.  Remember that we live in a great nation, and these people are the reason it's such a great place.

I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, May 24, 2015

When Bein' Happy Drives People Away

Anybody who can't deal with bein' friends with you when you're happy, isn't really your friend.
Hiya, Friends.  Happy Sunday to you. 

Well, not exactly 'happy,' Friends, I guess. 

You see, my friend Pidgie McDougall said she doesn't wanna be friends with me, anymore, and it's because I'm too happy all the time.  How can somebody be too happy, for Pete's Aches?

This is how.  Pidgie and I used to work together at the Company.  We didn't start out bein' friends, but then we got to be friends, and I thought it was really nice!  We weren't best friends or anything, but friends enough.

Then you'll remember that I had a falling-out... some creative differences with the Powers That Be over at the Company, and I hijacked the public address system in the Building and played Johnny Paycheck's hit song "Take This Job and Shove It" while I made my triumphal exit from the Building for the last time.  And after that, I went to work at Donut Dude's Corporate Headquarters as the Director of Donut Development. 

I've been really happy, ever since.

Thing of it is, Pidgie stayed over at The Company, and she isn't very happy.  She said she thinks that when I talk about my new job, I'm rubbin' her nose in her miserable situation.  That isn't how I intended it, but she says that's how I've been coming off, and she doesn't wanna be friends with somebody who has to rub her nose in their happiness.  So we aren't friends anymore.

It made me sad at first, for a while.  I'd rather be friends with people, insteadda bein' non-friends.  And if somebody doesn't wanna be friends with me on accounta something I did, or didn't do, or because of the way I said something, or because I took the last disha marshmella salad at the Little Kid Grocery... I wanna make things right.

But then I got to thinking about what's going on, and I decided that if somebody doesn't wanna be friends with me because I'm so happy, maybe it's more about them than it is about me, or anything I did.  It's hard for me, but I'm gonna hafta let this one go.  Move on, and all that.

Anyway, Friends, I'm sure glad I still have you.  I hope my Happy doesn't get on your nerves, too, but if it does, I sincerely apologize.  But if you're okay with all my Happy, we'll rock on.  Either way, I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, Big People!  Love ya lots!  Muah!

Saturday, May 23, 2015

As American as Apple Pie-n-Beauty Queens!

I'll just let the irony of this sink in.
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you!

Say, since it's Memorial Day Weekend, I figured I'd be patriotic and wear my red-white-n-blue outfit today.  Then, because I was bored and I saw it sparkling, I added my silver sequin tiara to my outfit, and I look quite striking, if I say so myself.  Which I do, because I just did.

Anyway, it struck me as a little bit ironic, wearin' a patriotic-themed outfit with a tiara.  I've recently been reading up on American History in my Little Big Board Book of the History of All Things, and evidently, there as a fairly large scuffle over here, over this very thing... sorta.

You see, before this country was the United States of America, it was a collection of colonies that belonged to England, and it was ruled over by whomever was the King of England at the time.  Sometimes, the King was a Queen, but most of the time, he was a King.

The Colonists over here didn't like being bossed around from afar, and they wanted to rule themselves and not have a King.  Or a Queen.  They wanted to elect their leaders and not let any one person run away with all the power.  So diplomatic relations broke down, shots were fired, independences were declarated, and just like that, here's the United States of America. 

With no King or Queen to rule them.

So what do we do?  A hundred and fifty years after all that, with the rebels and red-coats, we invent the Miss America beauty pageant, crown the winner a Beauty Queen, and say it's American as apple pie.

I'm three.  Can I really be alone in puzzling over the irony in all of this?  Big People?

Anyways.  I still think the sparkly tiara goes really well with my red-white-and-blue outfit today.  I'm not going to read in any more ironic messages in it.  I'm just going to appreciate the way the tiara makes me look taller and how it catches the light.  It's a fashion statement.  Nothing more.

Hey.  I love ya lots.  I'll see ya tomorrow.  It's Memorial Day Weekend.  Take some time to remember, Friends.  You know what I'm talking about.  I love ya lots.  Muah!

Friday, May 22, 2015

When Life Hands You Slides!

It's all in how ya look at things, Big People!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Friday to you!

Hey.  I'm gonna keep it short for today.  It's Friday, and that means we've got some Fridaying to do!

You know how sometimes Life gives ya a great big slide?  You can either look at that like this bad thing, or you can turn it around into something Fun!

You know what I do when I'm presented with a slide, Friends?  I climb up that ladder, pause at the top, sit down, throw my hands in the air, and yell "Wheeeeeeeeee!" the whole way down that slide!

It's all in how ya look at things, Big People!

So today, remember that your pal Zoe loves ya lots!  Go out and have some whole big lots of fun.  Throw your hands up in the air and yell "Wheeeeeee!"

I'll ketchup with ya tomorrow, mmmkay?  Muah!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

If It Is To Be, Then It Is Up To ME!

If it is to be, then it's up to me!
Well, hiya, Friends!  It's Thursdee, so of course, we're still in the work-week. 

The work-week gets me to thinking, Friends, that we all have work to do.  I have work to do. 

Well, ya know.  Growin' up kind of work.  Gettin' really good at the appropriate use of a pencil or crayon.  Learnin' how to dial the phone.  Listening to the Big People in my life while preserving my Own Mind. 

Yeah, there's lots to do, even when you're three.

And the thing I've learned about all this work is that nobody's going to do it for me.  If it is to be, then it's up to me, Big People.  You have different work to do, but the saying's the same for you.  Whatever it is that you need to get crackalackin' on, it's up to you.

It's kinda scary to think about, on the one hand, but on the other hand, isn't that EMPOWERING?!  We don't hafta sit around, waiting for permission to improve.  We just gotta jump in and start!

Let's go get 'em, Friends!  We can do this.  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Without Fail, My Pal Abigail!

I can talk to Abigail about anything!
Hiya, Friends! 

You know, I have a new friend named Abigail.  She's a pink bunny, and she came to life with me at Eastertime, and I'm so glad she did!

You see, my family's been going through a rough spell this year.  Nothing crisis-y.  Nothing like that.  Don't worry about me, Friends.  What I mean is that I've lost three of my great-grandparents since the Beginning of the Year.  It makes things rough for a Little Kid.  It really does.

Abigail came into my life after my Great-Grandma Blake went Home.  Lotsa people I've never met were in town... relatives, I'm told.  It all was a little overwhelming for this Little Kid.  Parts of it were lotsa fun, like seeing some cousins I don't get to see, but other parts of it were kind of horrific- all these people I don't know, havin' to be on my Best Behavior, even though I'm tired-n-hungry-n-overwhelmed, so much loudness from all the visiting, bein' off'n my usual routine...

Not to mention that when things like that happen, there's lotsa stress that floats around among Big People.  Ya start givin' off stressy vibes, and I guess I pick up on those, Friends.  I really do.

I did my best, but I know I didn't put my best foot forward.  I really didn't.  I didn't mean to, but it just happened.  I had kind of a showdown with Mommy, and we both had a meltdown with each other.  Mommy was embarrassed, and I was, too, except in the heat of the moment, I didn't realize 'embarrassed' was how I was feeling.

Anyway.  Abigail.  It was right around Eastertime, and one of my Great-Aunts had to stick around town for a few extra days.  One night, Daddy came home from work, and he had a brand-new boxa crayons, a blank drawing tablet with a note from my Great-Aunt, written just for me, and... A wonderful little pink bunny with floppy ears.  I named her Abigail, and she's been my best friend, ever since.

You see, I still love my other best friends, Sabretooth, of course, and Buddy, Puppy, and Walter Sweet.  I still love 'em lots.  But Abigail and I can talk about stuff I don't like to talk about with my other friends.  She's just easy to talk to.  She's a really good listener, and she's really gentle.

I haven't known Abigail a long time, but I know she and I were just meant to be friends.  Everybody needs a special pal like Abigail, especially when they're going through a Rough Patch like I have been.

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Movie-n-Popcorn with Daddy!

This is a picture of my Mommy on my shirt!
Hiya, Friends!  You know what I think is pretty cool?  You know what I ask for and look forward to, just about every evening?

Sittin' on the couch with Daddy, eatin' popcorn and watchin' a movie.  Sometimes, a movie is just one of our favorite television programs, but the popcorn, and Daddy, just makes it special.

Mommy wasn't gonna let me have popcorn until I'm six.  That's a long ways off.  She says she read it in a book somewhere that Little Kids aren't supposed to have popcorn until they're six.  Well, I'll tell ya what.  Mommy's just anti-fun, is what she is.  If she had her way, I'd be going to bed at eighto clock at night, too!

Good thing I have Daddy here to overrule her!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Mommy has a point about popcorn bein' a choking hazard, but Daddy makes sure I just eat the nicey fluffy-popped kernels, and not the little hard un-popped ones.  Daddy makes sure I eat popcorn, one piece at a time, and that I never eat popcorn alone.  I respect this trust Daddy invests in me, and I enjoy the time that he spends in the evenings with me, watchin' something on the television, and eatin' popcorn with me.  I sure do!

It's the little things in life that make it magical, Friends!  Like when I get to see you every day.  How about that?!

Hey.  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, May 18, 2015

I Have Some Big Plans!

I'm gonna grow some sunflowers!  How about that?!
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, it was a pretty neat weekend, wasn't it?  The weather was mostly really nice.

One thing that I'm really excited about today is that I got to go to the home improvement store, pick out two plant-pots of my very own, pick out a seed packet, and bring 'em home to plant them in real, honest-to-goodness DIRT!

I picked out sunflowers.  Dwarf sunflowers, actually.  Mommy said they'd be just the ticket for me to grow in a little plant-pot.

It was really fun, sprinkling the sunflower seeds in the dirt, then covering them up and watering them.  I plan to keep on watering them.  I'm gonna watch those little sunflowers sprout, and just love 'em right up into bein' grown-up sunflowers!  How about that?!

I think I'm gonna love bein' a gardener, Friends! 

I love ya lots!  I've got some gardening to do!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Lemme Tell Ya 'Bout My New Wheels!

I'm back in the Driver's Seat, Friends!  It feels GREAT!
Well, Friends, I don't know if you remember or not, but I used to have a little Pink Jeep that I drove around in.  It was pretty neat.  Made me feel like a Big Cheese. 

Then I outgrew my amazing Pink Jeep.  That was a dark day for me.  I'm not gonna lie.  I've been without a little car, ever since.

Sure, I have my Big VeeDub Bus, but it's stationary.  It doesn't roll.  It isn't the same.

Then on Friday, magic happened.  The UPS truck drove up my driveway and brought me a new Little Pink Roadster!

There'll be pictures of me with my new little car, soon.  It's great.  It has Early Twentieth Century styling.  I like to think of it as a Pierce-Arrow car.  Princess pink.  Chrome radiator cap.  Black bumpers.  Working headlights.  Simulated wood steering wheel.  Tufted vinyl seat.  Pinstriping.

Oh, this little buggy's great!  I can either use the pedals, or I can just shuffle my feet. It has all the power I really need, after all.

Sure, it lacks the cup-holder, Cheerio compartment, and radio that my Little Pink Jeep had, but my new Little Pink Roadster has a certain style, class, and attitude that's really in-tune with the Little Kid I am today.  So I couldn't be happier, Big People!

Now I know why you all get so excited when you get a new car!  This is great!

I'll see ya tomorrow, Friends, but now I have some drivin' to do!  Muah!

Saturday, May 16, 2015

That's Okay, I Got An Apple!

Don't worry about me!  I've got me an apple!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday! 

Hey, you know what?  I was a little upset yesterday, when you went to the vending machine without me and you didn't bring me back anything. 

I was a little chuffed.  Not mad enough to send ya a toilet seat in the inter-office mail or anything like that, but my nose was a little bent.

But it's all okay today.  I had a coupla bites of chocolate last night, and it was fine.  Today I've got myself an apple.  I like apples, too.  I got this one for myself.  It's a Cortland.  Crisp, sweet, juicy, and a little tart.  Everything you'd ever want from an apple.  It's phenomenal, actually, and fulla vitamins and minerals and FLAVOR! 

I guess I'm doin' all right without the vending machine candy bar you didn't bring me yesterday.  It's all good.  This kid knows how to bring home the apple and eat it right off'n the core, skin'n'all, just like a Big Person.  That's right.

Anyways, I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots.  I really do, Friends!  You go get yourself an apple, too.  They're good for ya!  I wantchya around for a long time with me! Muah!

Friday, May 15, 2015

I'd Like Some of That!

Psssst- What's that I see in your hand?  Is it chocolate?  I smell chocolate!
Well, hiya, Friends!  Did you ever think we'd make it to Friday? 

Hey.  What's thatchya got there?  Right there, in your hand.  Right there, with the wrapper.  What is that?

That's a rhetorical question.  I know what it is.  You've recently visited the vending machine, and you've gotchya some chocolate in that little hand of yours, don't you?

You know who also likes chocolate?  Your pal Zoe.  Dark, milk, caramel-filled, chocolate in a crunchy candy shell.  I do not discriminate when it comes to chocolate. 

Kinda makes me an easy person to shop for, wouldn't you say, Friends?  I mean, I'd be basically happy... nay, THRILLED with something out of the vending machine.  Anything out of the vending machine! 

I'll just leave that information right there for ya.

Hey.  Happy dang ol' Friday, Friends.  I love ya lots.  I do!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Thirsty Thursday

It's one of those weeks, amIright, Friends?!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Thursday to you! 

Boyo boy!  What a drink!  I mean week!  I mean I need a drink!

Hey, Bub.  I'm talking about some juice.  I'm three.  What kinda kid do you think I am?  Really, my beverage options are pretty limited at this point in my life.  Most of the time, I drink good ol' liquid hydrogen dioxide... that's water for you non-book-nerd types.  I get milk with my meals, because I'm a growing Little Kid.  Juice is a sometimes treat, and root beer is a super-sometimes treat. 

Today's a day for juice, I think, by gum.

Well, because it's just been that kind of a week, hasn't it?  The weather's been up, up, up, down, crazy, and Odd.  I'm not complainin'.  Mercurial weather keeps ya on your toes, unless your mercurial weather happens in the Midwest under roiling skies, in which case, mercurial weather is not fun, and it keeps you crouched in impact-readiness-position in a strong interior room with no windows.  (Stay safe out there, Friends in Tornado Alley!  I'm keepin' ya in my thoughts and prayers!)

I'm makin' myself thirsty, talkin' about all the things I like to drink.  You Big People have your Thirsty Thursday beverage favorites, but I really like juice.  Come on and join me, Friends!  Have a drink of juice with me, and we can all say 'Thank Goodness Tomorrow's Friday!'

Hey.  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Well, It's Wednesday Wednesday!

For the Wednesdayest of Wednesdays, just smile and keep on keepin' on !
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, it's Wednesday.  It's such a Wednesday that I've decided to call today "Well, It's Wednesday Wednesday!" 

I don't know what really makes a Wednesday feel like the Wednesdayest of Wednesdays, unless it's a Wednesday that makes ya feel like you've come so far- like over the at-grade intersection that Monday is, and across the wide, flat expanse that's Tuesday.  And then here you are at Wednesday, and you're farther on your Journey of the Week than you were on Monday, but tomorrow still isn't Friday, because tomorrow's Thursday, which is a downhill for sure, but it can have some pretty twisty turns, so you can't just put 'er in Neutral and coast in... you've gotta pay attention tomorrow, too!  After that, it'll finally be Friday, which is a nicey gentle slope, nice and straight, with fresh pavement.

Today, to me, this is the Wednesdayest of Wednesdays.  Smack in the middle like that.  It's an uphill climb 'til lunchtime, and then things sorta take a dip to the end of the day.

We'll get through this Well, It's Wednesday Wednesday, Friends.  I'm pullin' for ya!  I love ya lots, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Mondee Gras Aftermath

Mondee Gras can get out of hand, as it turns out!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Tuesday to you!  Didja celebrate Mondee Gras yesterday?  No?  Well, didja at least be the fun you wanted to see in the world?

Well, I guess it's just as well that you didn't celebrate Mondee Gras yesterday.  It certainly spared you from the cleanup that we're having to do today.

Oh, I don't really know what happened, except that when ya bring out trays and trays of special donut holes and call 'em Mondee Gras Beads, and ya have somebody goin' around throwin' regular beads to people, and ya tell people it's Mondee Gras, things can just get a little bit outta hand.  People start swinging from light fixtures that aren't meant to be swung from.  Wheelie chairs start racing up and down corridors.  Somebody orders a confetti cannon and glitter bombs (sorry, Donut Dude!)

Lesson learned.  That's why I'm the Director of Donut Development, and not the Morale Manager.  I have a way of dreamin' big, and then things go kafluey from time to time.  I build my castles in the clouds, but don't always remember to make sure they have good foundations under 'em... or a fully-equipped cleaning staff.  Castles in the clouds are especially dependent on a fully-equipped cleaning staff.  A whole maintenance armada, if you will.

But.  My Mondee Gras Bead donut holes with the edible glitter were a HIT.  So there's a silver lining.  Actually a glittery coating.  So Donut Dude is only a little bit mad at me for instigating yesterday's Mondee Gras melee.  And he says by the time all of us get everything cleaned up today, he won't be at all mad anymore.

Live and learn, right, Big People?!

Hey.  There's a mop-n-bucket with my name on it, so I've gotta go.  I sure love ya lots, Friends.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Monday, May 11, 2015

Be the Fun You Want to See in the World!

Nothing says "fun!" like somebody throwin' beads atchya!
Hiya, Friends!

Hey you know?  I know Mondays can be rough, especially after a weekend as beautiful as the one we had.  That was a doozy, wasn't it?  Warm weather, sunny skies.  Why, I even got to enjoy my first campfire and roasty marshmellas on Saturday night.

It was a great weekend!

Great weekends make it all the more like a bucketa cold water when Mondee morning rolls around, and that's why I've decided at MY office today, I'm gonna implement "Mondee-Gras!"

Mondee-Gras is like Mardi Gras, except it can happen any Monday, and you don't hafta give up chocolate for Lent the very next day, if you do that sort of thing.  Nope!  Mondee-Gras is all the fun of Mardi Gras, but without the guilt the next day. 

Since I work at Donut Dude's Corporate Headquarters now, we're celebrating with beads and donut holes that we usually call "Li'l Donut Dudes" but today, they're Mondee-Gras Beads.  We broke out the edible glitter to coat 'em in, so like me, the Mondee-Gras Beads donut holes are Sparkly and Fun!  How about that?!

Anyways, I see the fellas from down in the kitchen are here, so I've gotta go set up my Mondee Gras party for my coworkers.  If your workal situation is lacking some fun today, don't wait for somebody else to change it.  Be the fun you want to see in the world. 


Be the fun you want to see in the world!

That's a really deep thought I'm gonna wanna hafta leave you on, Friends!  I love ya lots, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Behind the Scenes with Zoe!

Take it easy, Friends!  I'm not wearin' a sweater on a hot day!
Hiya, Friends!  Happy Sunday!  Happy Mothers Day to all of you Mamas out there! 

Now, I betchya you're wonderin' why I'm wearin' a sweater today.  It's Springtime!  So why am I dressed like it's snowy and cold outside?

Well, I'll letchya in on a little behind-the-scenes secret.  In today's picture, I'm dressed for snowy cold weather because it was snowy and cold weather the day that picture was taken.  Don't be mad, but the pictures on this blog generally run about 6 to 8 weeks behind when they were actually taken.  So if you follow along on The Daily Zoe Facebook Picture Show, you might recognize me from a day long ago. 

Double-dippin' the pictures just helps keep the workflow efficient around here.  So don'tchyoo worry about your pal Zoe bein' dressed in duds that are too hot for the current weather situation.  Don'tchyoo worry about that for a minute!  I'm all right.  I'm dressed appropriately for the weather.  It's just if we waited around for today's pictures, we'd wind up havin' to call this blog "The Occasional Zoe."  We don't want that.  I've been doin' pretty well, keepin' up with the keepin' up, and that's 'cause I've finally found my System. 

Hey.  Enjoy this Sunday.  Call your Mom.  Tell her Happy Mother's Day.  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Happy as a Ladybug!

If you're happy and ya know it, dress like a ladybug, just like the song says!
Hiya, Big People!  Happy Saturday to you!

You know, sometimes, you've just gotta hafta dress happy when you're as happy as I am.  That's why I'm wearin' my Ladybug dress today.  Nothin's happier to me than a ladybug!

Well, I guess you could make a case for a pig in slop, but Mommy won't let me dress up like a pig in slop because she says that's "messy."  Whatevs.

I'm not going to let her prejudice against fun ruin my happy mood today.

Why is it that I'm so happy, anyways?  I'll tell ya.  We have had quite a stretcha great weather.  I loved winter, for sure, but it seems like it's finally givin' spring a chance to shine, and I think that's great.  Gotta get the Vitamin Sun while we can, to get us through the next winter.  But let's not think about that right now.  Let's think about how glorious it is too look outside and see a blue sky, green grass and leaves, and little yella flowers all over the lawn that I can pick and use to draw designs on my skin with!

Spring is pretty great, Friends!  And so are you!  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, May 8, 2015

Zoe's Literacy Project: The Big Enough Helper!

You don't need a pretend magnifying glass to see I'm a big enough helper!
Friends, in my continuing effort to catch up on the Classics, today I wanna talk to you about another little book that I love, and that book is called The Big Enough Helper, written by Nancy Hall and illustrated by Tom O' Sullivan.  According to the inside cover, the book was Mommy's, and it was written in 1978, but Mommy didn't get it until Easter Time in 1981.

How about that?!

This book is about a little girl named Suzy and her mommy named Mama. 
You know, even though this was Mommy's book, and she woulda related to little Suzy when she was given this book, the thing of it is, she's much more like Mama now.  and I find myself really relating to Little Suzy, which is sorta ironic.  You would think that having read this book and felt for Suzy when she was a kid, Mommy wouldn't have forgotten how it feels to be a little kid and being told she's too little to help with things.  And yet, apparently, she has, because she ALWAYS tells me I'm too little.

But back to the book.

You see, Suzy and Mama are going to the laundromat at the opening of the book.  Mama has a big load of wash to do, and Suzy wants to help, but she's told she's too little.  Mama tells her to play with her dolly, and Suzy does, until the laundromat manager scolds her for playing with the laundry carts with her dolly, because the laundry carts are just for doing laundry, not for children playing or riding in.

Terrible waste of a laundry cart, if ya ask me. 

Anyways, Suzy sees one of her socks on the floor, outside of the washing machine, so she decides to pick it up and toss it in the wash- tryin' to be helpful, you know!  But do you know what happens?  Hot water, suds, and wet clothes come tumbling out all over her. 

Suzy's Mama dries her off and sits her up on toppa a laundry-folding table to just stay the heck outta the way.  And Suzy does, but a fella needs to fold his wash.  Do you know what he does?  He LETS SUZY HELP!  That's right, he does.  He gives her a towel to fold, and fold it she does.  He asks her to pair up and fold socks into little balls, and she doesn't know how to do that, so HE SHOWS HER!!!  And then when his Little Kid wakes up in his stroller and starts to fussing, the fella lets Suzy play with the little kid, to keep him outta trouble while he finishes up folding his wash!  How about that?!

And that's not all.  When he's leavin' the laundromat, he thanks Suzy for bein' sucha good little helper, and he thanks Suzy's MAMA for lettin' him borrow her good little helper!

Well, I'll tell ya what, Friends.  Mama sure gets her comeuppance from that stranger tellin' her what a good little helper Suzy is.  He was all nice about it and everything, but Mama sure got the point.  Suzy's a big enough helper, after all!

Just like me.  I'm a big enough helper, after all.  I love to help Mommy mop the floors.  She didn't usedta let me, but now she lets me run the scrub-brush on a stick, and she follows along with the string mop.  It feels good to be able to help!

Friends, if you have a little kid in your life that wants to help, let us.  If we don't know how to do something, show us how.  My people, the Little Kids, love to help you.  We really do.  But you always think we're Too Small.  Please give us a chance. 

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Zoe's Literacy Project: The Brave Little Steam-Shovel!

Hiya, Friends!  Well, ya know, I love to read, and I've been catchin' up on all the Classics lately. 

I can relate to little Sandy the Steam Shovel!
Today I'd like to talk about a current favorite Classic of mine, and that is The Brave Little Steam Shovel written by Alf Evers and illustrated by Dick Stone.  My book's copyright date is 1951, and it says inside the front cover that it usedta be GRAMMA'S little book!  How about that?!

Well, anyway, on to the story.  You see, Sandy's a little blue baby steam-shovel, and he goes to a garage to live. There's three big, fat trucks at this garage, and a big red steam-shovel named Joe that also live at Sandy's garage.  The other machines kinda pick on poor little Sandy Steamshovel at first, on accounta they're all big, and Sandy's small. 

One day, Sandy gets to go out on a job, digging a cellar for the New School that's bein' built.  Everything goes all hunky-dory for Sandy until he hits a big rock with his bucket.  The big rock is too big and heavy for Sandy to lift up, so he hasta go back to the garage and Joe, the big red steam-shovel, gets to go to the job and get it done.

Sandy has lotsa days were he has to just stay home at the garage, and it makes him a sad little steamshovel.  But it's rained a lot, and there's a landslide across the Main Road.  Thing of it is, Joe the steamshovel is too darned big to get through on the narrow road, so it's time for Sandy's second chance!

It's a lotta hard work for Sandy, but he gets the road cleared.  He even runs up against another big, heavy rock.  He can't pick it up.  But he can push it, and push that rock, he does... right the heck over a CLIFF!  How about that?!  And then it's back to the garage for a hearty round of congratulations for that brave little blue steam shovel!

I love this little book, because I can really relate to Sandy the Steam Shovel.  Sometimes things are too big for me to handle, but every so often, there comes along a job that's just me-sized, and by golly, do I ever shine. 

So that's that for today's Zoe's Literacy Project.  It's good to catch up on the Classics!  I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Shakin' Things Up!

Normally, it'd be Maraca Monday, but I'm shakin' things up!
Hiya, Big People!

Hey, I know that Cinco de Mayo was yesterday, but I wanna hafta extend the holiday into today by usin' my maracas to just shake up the middle of the week.

You can accompany your shooken-up Midweek with a variety of musics.  Some of my favorites are:

"Shake, Rattle-n-Roll" by Bill Haley and the Comets

"Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift (of course!)

"Shake Your Groove Thing" by Peaches & Herb

"Shake It Up" by the Cars

"Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)" by the Jacksons

"Shake It Out" by Florence and the Machine

"Shake Your Booty" by KC and the Sunshine Band

And finally, for the end of the day "You Shook Me" by AC/DC.

This is not meant to be a comprehensive list, as I am only three and a half, so I don't know all the shaky songs out there.  If I've missed one that you know, tell me about it!  Leave me a comment! 

I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Transitions Are Tough!

I am a master of the non-sequitur.
Hiya, Friends! 

Hey, do you know someone who has a hard time bridging the gap from one subject to the next?  Does someone you care about struggle with the segue?

Boyo boy, do I ever understand and get it. 

I'm not here to sell ya any solution to the problem of the herky-jerky segue.  Nope!  I'm just here to commiserate today.  Whenever I'm called upon to make a conversation flow gently from one topic to another, I've taken to just introducing a third, completely - and I mean come-PUH-leeeeet-leee- new, unrelated topic into the mix and hoping it all just shakes out.

Because of this, Mommy calls me the Master of the Non-Sequitur. 

I'm not sayin' my method's the best, but here's how it works.  Mommy and a grown-up friend of hers are talking about how nasty the birds are this year (Psssst- they're super-nasty!)  I want to talk about getting somebody to take me to a store so I can buy more PEZ candies.  I'm all out of PEZ candies, and that's very distressing for me, but I don't know how to get the grown-ups off this insipid conversation about the nasty birds, so here's how it goes:

Grownups: "Blah, blah, blah, they made a mess of the car, blah, blah, blah, we should get a cat or soemthing, blah, blah, blah." (stops to take a breath, and this is key)

Me:  "I have the Octopod from the Octonauts, and it has a buncha the Gups with it!"

At this point, the grownups will look at me and smile like you grownups do when a Little Kid interrupts.  Whatever.  I'm on a mission.

Mommy: "Honey, the grownups are talking.  What does your Octopod have to do with the birds we're talking about?"

Me: "Nothing!  I want to go to the store and get some more PEZ!  Right now, Mommy!"

And that's that.

I don't always get to go to the store to get more PEZ, but nine times out of ten, at least I've successfully derailed the conversation about the dang ol' birds.  Or whatever the Big People were talking about.

Well, it's because Little Kids just don't get any respect, and transitions are tough.  That's all.  Hey.  I'll see ya tomorrow, Big People.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Monday, May 4, 2015


It's good to be in the ol' new Imaginatron 2100 again!
Hiya, Friends! 

Do you remember how I'm a test-pilot for the Imaginatron Company?  Well, I am.  I still am, even.  I've just had a lotta other things going on, so I don't always get to test pilot as many Imaginatrons as I would like to, and when I do, I don't always have time to tell ya about it.

Imaginatrons are pretty great things, Friends.  My favorite model to test-fly is the 2100.  Although it's ostensibly Imaginatron's entry-level model, it doesn't lack for features.  It's a good small-to-medium size. Readily available.  It employs Imaginatron's trademark Imaginative Cloaking, so that to the untrained/unimaginative eye, it's just a cardboard box, but to an Imaginatron user, it's a blank canvas, ready to become whatever you want it to be.  You can even link up a whole buncha Imaginatrons in the 2100 Series, and have yourself a multiplex Imaginatron for added fun!

Yes, there are other models in the Imaginatron line.  They aren't seen as frequently as the 2100 series, but they exist.  For instance, the next size up would putchya in mind of a refrigerator box, or a crate that a new dishwasher or washer or dryer would come in.  Those are the Imaginatron 2500s.  Like I said, they're kinda rare.  They just don't turn up very often.

Then there are the great-big, room-sized, hard-install Imaginatrons. They're part of the Imaginatron 7000X Series.  If you've got one, they're great.  If not, installing one is gonna take an entire re-do.  I mean, it just is, Big People.  But if you're really committed to the Imaginatron experience, and you know what size you really want, and you know you're not gonna be moving or anything like that anytime soon, I can have the Company send ya a brochure.

As for me, I love the 2100 Series.  I've flown a lotta places in those good ol' Imaginatron 2100s, and I know I'm just beginning!

Hey.  Do whatchya love, love whatchya do.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Sunday, May 3, 2015

I Was Happy, Just the Same

French Toast and pancakes are almost the same thing, Big People!
Hiya, Friends!  How the heck are ya?  I've got me a head fulla dreams and a paira lungs fulla air, so I can't complain.  Can't complain at all!

Yes, I'm SURE it's dreams my head's fulla, and not air.  Goodness, who letchyoo in today with that attitude?


You know, last Sunday, I accompanied my Daddy to the Texas Hot in Downtown Wellsville.  I love that place.  I love to eat there!  Any time of the day, I love to eat at that place!  It's like another home to me.  If ya blindfolded me and took me there, I'd know that's where I was, before you even got me through the door.

Well, last Sunday, it was just me and Daddy.  I wanted pancakes for my lunch, and that woulda been a perfect Sunday lunch, were it not for one minor detail:  The Texas Hot in Downtown Wellsville stops serving pancakes at eleven, and we were there after eleven.  So if you do out the math, that meant no pancakes for your pal Zoe.  It didn't even matter how ADORABLE I am.  Rules is rules, and they're there for a reason: the griddle has to be at a different temperature to handle the more lunchy things you can order at the Texas Hot- you know, hot dogs, burgers, Texas Hots- and my pancakes wouldn't turn out well if they cooked 'em on the griddle set up for those other things.  Conversely, they coulda turned the griddle to a different temperature to accommodate my pancakes, but there's more people wanting the lunchy things at that time of day, and it wouldn't be fair to them to have lousy burgers, dogs, n' Texas Hots, just 'cause I had to have pancakes.

It was explained to me that French Toast is almost just like a pancake, and they make French Toast all the time there.  Would I be willing to have French Toast insteadda my beloved pancakes?

Of COURSE I'd be willing to have French Toast, Big People.  I'm not one of these kids who expects every single meal to be the exact epitome of the Best Meal Ever, especially when I'm out-n-about.  I don't get all bent outta shape if everything doesn't go my way!  I learn to bend WITH all of it!

So I had the French Toast, and it was really great.  I'd definitely have it again, if I get to the Texas Hot too late for pancakes.  Like they said, French Toast is just like pancakes, so I was happy, just the same!

You see, Big People, it doesn't hurt to be a little flexible.

Hey.  I love ya lots.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Saturday, May 2, 2015

My Friends the Little Giraffes

Wellington and I go way back!
Hiya, Friends!

You know, I've come a long way from bein' a TigerBaby who liked to chew on Little Giraffes, three years ago.  Don't get me wrong.  I'm still a TigerBaby at heart, and a TigerTot in size and spirit. 

But I don't chew on Little Giraffes anymore.  They don't like that.

I never thought a thing of it, back when I usedta roam the wild steppes of the Bing.  I never stopped to think about how those Little Giraffes would feel if I grabbed 'em up and gnawed on 'em.  I was just gettin' teeth, and those Little Giraffes felt good on my sore gums.

One day, a Little Giraffe named Sophie ended up gettin' in my way, so I scooped her up and started gnawing on her HEAD, and did she ever give me a piece of her mind!  I learned that day that although they be little, Little Giraffes have normal-sized feelings and deserve to be afforded a hippopotamus-sized measure of dignity and respect, but thingofitis, a lot of Tiger Babies think it's okay to catch and chew on Little Giraffes.

That's how my work with the Little Giraffes began, Friends.  There's our Origin Story.  I took Sophie la Giraffe out of my mouth, wiped her down with a Sensitive Flavor Wet Wipe (psssst- I still say if the wet wipe people don't wantchyoo suckin' on the Sensitive Flavor Wet Wipes, they shouldn't have given 'em sucha delicious flavor!), and listened to what she had to say.  I sought enlightenment on the plight of Little Giraffes everywhere.  It didn't take long for Sophie and me to collaborate on a coalition to raise awareness of the plight of Little Giraffes of the Wild Steppes of the Greater Bing Area, and soon enough, we were raising awareness of the plight of Little Giraffes everywhere.

Yes, everywhere.

It's a lotta work, but it's so rewarding.  Whenever I see one of the Little Giraffes I help smile, it's just all so worthwhile.

Makes me glad that this TigerBaby, at least, could find it in her heart and her poor, sore gums, to change her stripes.

LeopardBabies... well, we're still working on inroads with the LeopardBabies.  You'll just hafta file that one under "stay tuned."

Just goes to show ya, Friends, everybody can learn and change for the better. I love ya lots, Big People, and I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Friday, May 1, 2015

Dressed to Be Fabulous!

This outfit was made for bein' fabulous, and so was I, Friends!
Hiya, Big People! 

Well, ya know, I consider myself something of a fashionista.  I love clothes, and clothes love me. 

Well, due to this really close friendship clothes and I share, I know just how powerful the right outfit can be.  If you're wearin' the wrong clothings, all's you wanna hafta do is curl up on the couch or inside your powder blue VeeDub bus tent and eat Cheetos. 

But wear the right outfit, like a Snoopy T-Shirt, green tutu-skirt, black ruffled BabyLegs, Hello Kitty socks, a red ladybug chapeau and red dress pumps, and you won't give another thought to the couch or Cheetos.

You'll still wanna hafta think about your blue VeeDub bus, though, because how else are ya supposed to get to the party to show off your fabulous frock?  I don't know about your fairy godmother, but mine won't do the pumpkin-to-coach conversion.  She says that's Cinderella's fairy godmother's thing.  So she makes my VeeDub bus go!

I don't let people eat Cheetos in my enchanted VeeDub bus, though, Friends.  That just isn't cool.  I don't want my sweet vintage white vinyl interior gettin' all grubbed up with orange stuff off'n those extruded corn snacks.  My bus, my rules!

Aw, I love ya just the same, anyways, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Dress to be Fabulous!  Muah!