It's Almost As Good!

It doesn't change colors, but my dress is still almost as good as a magic dress!

Hiya, Friends!  Happy Monday to you!

As you can see, I'm wearing a pretty dress today.  It doesn't change colors like Princes Aurora's Magic Dress does, but it's still pretty and it's still fun to wear.  And it's my dress.

What I like most about my dress I'm wearin' today is that Gramma got it for me.  But other nice features include the bright pink color, the big frilly skirt, and the way it makes me look like a FLOWER!  How about that?!

Don't think I've given up on the idea of a magical color-changing dress, though, Big People.  I'm workin' on it.  It's weird to me in this day and age that Flora, Fauna, and Merriweather aren't reachable by email, at least not that I can see from my searches.  But maybe they don't make their contact information very accessible, to keep the riff-raff from just hailing them with all kindsa trivial stuff.  I betchya that happens a lot to the magic people like Flora, Fauna, and Merriweather.  I understand.  But I'll find a way to get hold of them!  I sure will!

Anyway, Friends, I wantchya to enjoy the rest of your Sunday.  I love ya lots.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

A Dress That Changes Colors!

I want a dress that changes to any color I want!

Hiya, Friends!  Happy Sunday to you!

Well, you know, I like watchin' princess movies, Friends, and one of my favorites is Sleeping Beauty.

Oh, not because of the whole fair princess saved by a handsome prince thing.  Yeah, that's nice, too, but that isn't what keeps me askin' for Sleeping Beauty to be on the television set.

No.  It's because Princess Aurora's dress changes from pink to blue to pink, and back to blue, through the magic of Flora, Fauna, and Merriweather.  And thing of it is, I want a dress like that!  A dress that has the magic so if I want it to be pink, it'll be pink.  Or blue, or purple, or yellow.  I like all the colors, and I really wonder why a kid has to be all stuck on one color of a dress, or hafta have a closet full of the same dress.  How convenient would it be if a kid could have just one dress of a certain style, and could change the color of it at will! 

That isn't saying I want just one dress in my closet.  But I'd like all the dresses in my closet to be different styles and able to change colors to any color I want, whenever I want it to.

Friends, I'd better see if I can find email addresses or cellular telephone numbers for Flora, Fauna, and Merriweather.  Maybe they could help a Little Kid out on this one.  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

When My Social Calendar Dumps!

When my social calendar dumps, I find a way to entertain myself!

Hiya, Friends!  Happy Saturday to you!

Well, ya know, I thought I was gonna have a really busy week this week, socially, and as it turned out, all my appointments and engagements cancelled.  Now, this sorta thing could really disappoint a Little Kid, but I find a way not to let it disappoint me.  I sure do!

You see, I pretty much decide I'm gonna be happy, no matter how things turn out.  If I get to do the things that I'd originally planned to do, that's just amazing!  If, on the other hand, events fall off my social calendar and I'm left at loose ends for what to do, I just figure out a new way to tie up those loose ends!

I use that time I didn't think I was gonna have to improve my office!  Sometimes, I work on art projects I wouldn't otherwise have time for.  I catch up on my stories on the television, or maybe read some of my favorite books.

See, Friends, when my social calendar dumps, I find ways to be happy, no matter what.  I'll catch 'em next time, you know?  No sense of bein' despondent about it.

I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Well Done, Big People!

You deserve a Vitamin C lollipop for gettin' through the week!

Well, hey there, Friends! 

Hey, I know this was a Week we've all just lived through, huh?  We have things pretty darned good around here and all, but I do acknowledge that sometimes it's still a grind. 

But we made it.  YOU made it, Big People!  It's Friday! 

You know, whenever I've done something extraordinary, either largely extraordinary or extraordinary in a small way, I like to celebrate with a Vitamin C lollipop, and I think you should, too. 

Vitamin C lollipops are just like regular lollipops, but they have Vitamin C in them. Can't have too much of that stuff this time of year, you know.  All those germs flyin' around, and all.  And I've seen those big Vitamin C horse pills you Big People take.  They look awful.  Vitamins oughtta be fun, that's what I always say.

So take a page outta your pal Zoe's book, get a package of Vitamin C lollipops, and congratulate yourself on makin' it through another week!  I'll ketchup with ya tomorrow, mmmkay?!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

The Day That Was Supposed to Be My Birthday

I didn't mean to be born late, Big People.  You gotta believe me!

Well, Friends, here we are on August the Twenty-Seventh again, the date that will apparently be forever known to me as "The Day That Was Supposed to Be My Birthday."

That's right.  Somewhere along the way, doctors told Mommy and Daddy I was supposed to come along on August the Twenty-Seventh.  Apparently this date meant a lot to them, Mommy especially.  Daddy's kind of let it go, over the years, but one of the first things I remember my mother saying to me on the night I was born was 'You were supposed to be here two weeks ago.'  I was like 'Are ya kiddin' me, lady? Do ya have any idea what I just went through, and you're pickin' right now to nag me about this?!'

Shoulda known right there, the tone of my life had been S-E-T set.

So anyways, yes.  My birthday was supposed to be August the Twenty-Seventh.  It was a Saturday that year, I remember, and I remember the "Be Born!" alarm went off, but I rolled over and hit 'snooze,' because... Saturday. I didn't know it was gonna set off this Whole Big Thing for the Rest of My Life.  Oh, my goodness!

Apparently by bein' tardy to my own birthday party, I changed the trajectory of my whole entire life.  Insteadda startin' kindergarten in the Fall of 2016, I'll be waiting until the Fall of 2017. So? 

You know, all the nagging aside, I wouldn't do a darn thing different.  I like my September birthday.  9-9-11.  I like my dark blue birthstone.  I like that insteadda havin' my birthday be bittersweet at the end of Summer, it'll be a bright beacon of fun and sugary cupcakes to look forward to after School starts, when I do finally go to school. 

So whatever.  I can handle hearin' about today bein' the day that was supposed to be my birthday.  Bein' born's a big deal.  This day just didn't speak to me as a Birthday.  I picked the day that did.  That's all.  I've gotta be me, and I plan to be Me for the rest of my whole entire life.

How about that?!

Being the Boss of Things and Stuff!

Heavy is the head that's wearin' the tiger earmuffs!

Hiya, friends! 

Well, you're not going to believe this, but it's true.  Back on July Fourth, I got to control the Pittsburgh Fireworks Display.  I wore my most patriotic outfit, donned my tiger headset, and controlled all those fireworks from the touch-screen of an iPhone 6.

It was glorious.  Lemme tell ya all about it!

First of all, as soon as the sun disappeared behind the hillsides surrounding Pittsburgh, and the sky started getting all powdery blue, I queued up the Fireworks Display on the iPhone screen and said "light 'em up, fellas!"

And sure as all get-out, about an hour, hour and a half after I gave the fireworks the order to start, the first one rocketed up into the sky and burst.  Then it was game the heck on!  It sure was!  There were fireworks of all sizes, shapes, and colors.  I sent a command to the pyro crew saying 'Just keep doin' whatchyer doin'!' and guess what.  They DID!

After a while, though, it was pretty dark, and had cooled off quite a bit, so I sent the pyro crew a message saying 'All right, fellas.  There's some kids in the crowd like me, and we probably oughtta get to bed, so go ahead and wrap it on up.'

Once again, twenty, twenty-five minutes right after I gave the cue, they started up the Grand Finale.  It was a glorious Grand Finale! 

I'm not gonna say it was exhausting, being the Big Boss of the Pittsburgh Fireworks Display, but I DID fall asleep on the ride back to Aunt Colleen's.  It was worth it, though!

See, Friends, heavy is the head that's wearin' the tiger earmuffs, but I'm up for the challenge!

A Public Service Annoucement from Your Pal Zoe!

Four shopping months left 'til Christmas!

Hiya, Friends! 

Well, you know, I realize that a good population of you are headin' Back to School today, and if not today, This Week Sometime.  I know that's a bummer.  I was lamenting the upcoming end to my Perpetual Summer Vacation that occurs in two years. 

But it is what it is, and today is what today is, and that is the Twenty-Fifth of the Month.  So while you're justifiably upset because this is the Beginning of the School Year, just think.  In four months, it'll be CHRISTMAS!  How about that?!

Hey.  Put down that shoe you wanna throw at me and hear me out.  Why do we hafta go through this every Twenty-Fifth?

I'm gently reminding you that there's four months left until Christmas because I don't want it to catch you unawares, and also, I wantchya to think about how on Christmas, we'll all be four months closer to Summer Vacation 2016 than we are today.

Although that means I'll also be four months closer to my Schooler debut in 2017, I believe that this is a fair trade-off.  You see, Friends, Time is going to march on, whether we like it or not.  If you don't believe me, just take a look through some of my past posts.  Accept it, or spend your life feelin' all regretful and anxious.  You don't want that!

Also, for those of you who DO like to put off thinkin' about Christmas, remember: you still have four months of Not-Christmas.  Bask in that!

Anyways, Friends, whether you love or hate my message today, I love the heck right outta you.  Big hugs!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

It's All Gonna Be Okay?

Things change.  I can deal with change.  I think?

Well, Friends, if ya didn't like my post from yesterday, then you'll wanna just close this browser window and come back tomorrow, because I'm still on this thing about havin' to go to School in two years.  Sorry.  But it's a very dire issue in my life right now, and I've gotta talk it out.  If ya think you can stick around and listen to me, I thank you kindly.

Friends, I had a talk with Mommy yesterday after I finished my blog post.  We talked about New Routines and how to settle into them, and pretty soon, those New Routines become The Routine, and you can't imagine your life without 'em.

Mommy told me a story about how before I was born, she was used to her life bein' a certain way... boring, if you want my unvarnished opinion on it... You see, before Me, it was just Rozzie-n-Mommy here during the day.  Aside from Rozzie's barking, it was Quiet.  There weren't toys in every room of the house.  If Mommy wanted to go somewheres, she could just up and drive off and go, and she wouldn't hafta think of anybody else.  She and Daddy could just decide to go on trips if they wanted to. 

Would you believe that she had no idea of any of the shows on Disney Junior, or that there even was a channel such as Disney Junior?!  That right there just blew the backa my head right off, learnin' that.

And then I came along, and Mommy had to get up in the night to make sure I wasn't hungry or wet.  She had to feed me at regular intervals, handle my diapering needs, make sure I got quality rest in my swing, and if I cried for no apparent reason, she had to give me lotsa hugs, when maybe she'd rather be picking up and just going somewheres for the day.  And she said that when she DID venture out with Baby Me, she had to take the baby seat, and the stroller, and the big diaper bag and a buncha nursette bottles of formula, and blankets, and a soft toy for me to hug... Goodness, I know she was just doing it for effect, but she sure made it sound like the first few weeks with Me were Quite Something!

Mommy told me that the first few weeks I was around, she wondered if she was up to the challenge.  She said she wondered why she even got herself into this to start with.  And then, she said, after a few weeks, she couldn't imagine her life without havin' to take care of me, and it wasn't a bad thing.  She got so she missed me in the night, when I started sleepin' longer.

Mommy says she bets it'll be the same way for me and school.  At first, I'll wonder what I've gotten myself into, and then I won't be able to imagine my life without it.  I'll just hafta see if it's really that way.  But I'm not gonna dwell on it, and I'm not gonna decide I don't like it before I even get there.

I think it's all gonna be okay, Friends.  I sure hope it's all gonna be okay.

Thank you for listening.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

My Days of Freedom Are Numbered

Whaddaya mean I hafta go to School in two years?! I just got here!

Friends, it has come to my attention this Sunday that school is beginning this week in my hometown.  Normally, this makes me feel indifferent or smug because I am not a schooler.  From where I stood, I could certainly not smell the pencil shavings or eraser exhaust. 

This year is different, though.  This year marks the turning-point for me.  You see, I will be beginning kindergarten in the fall of 2017.  I have known this my whole entire life, but 2017 seemed so far off.  Now, I can practically reach out my hands and grab 2017, and that brings all kindsa complicated feels up for me.  It really does.

You see, Friends, I have a good thing goin' here at my house.  I go to bed when I'm tired, I get up in the morning when I wanna, I get play-days at Gramma's, I don't hafta wear shoes... heck, I don't even hafta wear pants if I'm not in the mood for it.  I can eat when I'm hungry, and I'm TOLD to go to the bathroom more than I hafta ask permission to do the same.

That's all gonna change when this time, 2017 rolls around, and it strikes me that now I have less time left At Home With Mommy than I've enjoyed.  That's the aforementioned turning-point.  And I'm scared.  I'm homesick already.  I just don't know how this is gonna go, but I know my life won't ever be the same, and I also know it's gonna feel like I've joined some kinda kinder-army or something.

Oh, sure, I know I'll be meeting lotsa other little kids my age.  But I meet lotsa little kids my age when I'm out-n-about.  Oh, sure, I get stir-crazy in my house a lot, but once I sign on to go to School, there won't be any gettin' up in the morning, saying 'I'm not feelin' this,' and just skippin' it for the day.  Nope.  They keep tracka how often you come to School, Big People! 

Plus.  I am afraid for what'll happen to The Daily Zoe Facebook Show and The Daily Zoe Blog, once I'm at School.  Will they be able to keep going?  Will I figure out a way to reinvent them to fit with my new Schooler lifestyle?  I just don't know, Friends.  I just don't know.  Right now, I cannot imagine my life without lookin' in on you every day like I do.  But what if you get sick of me when I'm a Schooler, and not an adorably precocious Little Kid anymore?  It hurts my hear to think such things!  It really does!

I know what you're saying that I'd say, Friends, and I appreciate it.  I'm gonna try to follow your advice, which is my advice.  I'd tell you not to worry about stuff until there's a reason to worry.  I'd tell you that the answers will make themselves apparent when the time's right.  That's what I'd tell ya, and I hafta say, Big People, my advice sure tastes different in my mouth when I'm dolin' it out to myself, as opposed to when I'm dolin' it out to you.  Who asked me, anyways?

Heck, Friends.  I need to just go have a few minutes to myself, to realign my chakras and regain my grip.  I love ya lots, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  Thanks for listening!  Muah!

Princes and Problems

Prince Wednesday's all right, but he gets himself into more jams than Smuckers!

Friends, I have a friend named Prince Wednesday.  You see, I am a Fairy Tale Princess, and no fairy tale would be complete without a prince.  I guess I got matched up with Prince Wednesday in the Fairy Tale Match.  Somebody somewhere musta thought this was a good idea, so like a pair of scissors, I run with it.

Thing about Prince Wednesday is that he's always getting himself into trouble.  On his most recent visit to my kingdom, Prince Wednesday got his fancy coach stuck in some mud.  I mean, if you can navigate the roads in my kingom in a fancy coach with zero troubles, you can REALLY drive your fancy coach. Prince Wednesday cannot REALLY drive his fancy coach.

Anyways, he got his fancy coach all stuck, and he and his driver were trying to get the fancy coach all pulled outta the mud and ruts, and they weren't makin' any progress.  I watched for a little bit, because I think there's some kinda etiquette when you're a Fairy Tale Princess that the Prince gets to look valiant, and the Princess stands around waitin' for him to save the day.

Except, I don't have the time or patience to wait around for all that.  Not when I know how to fix something.  So I saddled up my Model Z and drove down to where the fancy coach was stuck, and hooked it up to the winch on the Model Z, and had that fancy coach unstuck and back on the road in justa few minutes.  I was pretty proud of my work, but do you think Prince Wednesday and his driver bothered to say 'thank you?'  No!  They went back to their own kingdom in a big huff!  Without a WORD, even!

Since then, I've sent him a buncha Fairy Tale Mail messages on the magic box, but I don't think he's openin' them or readin' them.  Oh, well, what are you gonna do?  I'm a princess who gets things done, and Prince Wednesday's a prince who gets himself into more jams than a Smucker's factory.  I'm not gonna stop bein' me, just because the me that I am doesn't fit in to how someone else thinks I oughtta be.  The world needs more doers, I guess is what I'm sayin', and I'm proud to be one! 

How about that?!

Shake It Up, Shake It Off!

Oh, you know me, workin' it in the dang ol' gymnasium!

Hiya, Big People! 

Wow, is it Friday again already?

Actually, this week seemed to take for-EVER to get back here to my favorite day of the week.  I think there must be something going on cosmically, because my Maternal Unit just kept jumpin' all over me, no matter what I did.  It was really annoying to the max, Friends. 

Got through it, though.  Well, ya know, Mommy oughtta know that she can't break a Little Kid like me's spirit just by bein' super-critical of everything I attempt!  That isn't how I'm wired. 

And.  I have a secret weapon for when things get really intense.

I dance.  I shake it up.  I shake it off.  I put on some good music and have a dance-off with myself.  The best part about it all is that I always win the dance-off.  It'd be pretty bad if I was coming in third place out of one contender, after all.

So, Friends, if you have someone who's oppressing you and you can't do anything about it because that person cooks your food and washes your clothes and carts you around to appointments, play days, shoppings, and the like, if that person cuts up your apples for you and peels your grapes, the best coping mechanism I can think of is dancin'.  Try it out and thank me tomorrow!  I love the heck right outta ya, Big People!  Muah!

Rosie the Racer!

Zozie and Rosie: A match made in roadster racing heaven!

Friends, you've heard all about Rosie the Riveter, but have you ever heard of Rosie the Racer?

Probably not, because as far as my knowledge goes, I just made it up.

You see, I have a really amazing pink roadster that I got to replace my Pink Jeep, which I outgrew a while ago.

My pink roadster can do it all, really, so when I saw a flyer at the Little Kid Gourmet about Roadster Racing, of course I went into the shop and souped my Rosie the Roadster right the heck up.  I turned her into Rosie the Racer!

I'd tell ya all about how I did it, but unfortunately, that's proprietary information, Friends.

Anyway, Rosie the Racer, my pit crew chief Rozzie the Dog, and me- we make a pretty formidable team on paved tracks as well as on dirt tracks.  I've studied all the racing writings of "Doc" Hudson from Cars fame, and reviewed all his vintage racing footage.  Those older racing machines had a lot of class!

And so do Rosie and me, Friends!  We're classy when we win, classy when we lose... in the end, it's all about the fun for us!

Hey.  I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  Right now, I have an engine to tune!  Muah!

Battlecar Galactica!

This is gonna be my car someday!

Hiya, Friends!  Well, if ya know me, you know I love cars.  New cars, small cars, big cars, old cars... I just pretty much love all things automobile.  They're all cool to me, even the weird ones.

Earlier this summer, Daddy bought himself a new Old Car to be his Daily Driver.  He bought a 1988 Eagle Wagon, that Mommy and I like to call the Eagle Scout.

I loved the Eagle Scout on sight.  I love everything about it, especially the interior. And the exterior.  I LOVE dark silver!

Something that could aggravate some modern drivers is that the Eagle Scout doesn't have any GPS.  It doesn't have a computer at all in it, as a matter of fact.  It isn't a very smart car...

... Or is it?  Hey.  I hear the news, too, People.  I've heard all about all these modern cars that are being computer-hacked by people from afar.  That's really scary!

That's what makes the Eagle Scout so cool and so smart.  Its mechanical systems are mechanical.  Nobody's controlling that car except the kid with her hands on the wheel and her feet on the pedals. 

It's like BATTLESTAR GALACTICA!  You know, all the other battlestars made fun of Galactica, because it was the oldest one in the fleet and didn't have all the modern conveniences that the other battlestars had, but then the Cylons came along and started hacking into the other battlestars, and in the end, it was just Battlestar Galactica living to fight the good fight. 

The Eagle Scout is just like that.  In fact, I'm changin' the name of MY new car that Daddy's just drivin' for me until I'm old enough to drive it to BATTLECAR GALACTICA!  Sure, the other kids in the school parking lot might make fun of me for drivin' it, but when their computer-cars go all wonky, who do you think they're gonna call for a ride? 

Hey, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Just Call Me Rosie Zozie!

The world seems happier when I wear my rose-colored glasses!

Hiya, Friends! 

Hey, if you know me, you know that I like to keep my disposition on the sunny side.  That isn't always easy, though, is it?  I mean, life gets in the way.  Mommy and Daddy get bossy.  That sorta thing. 

So what keeps your pal Zozie nice'n' Rosie? 

My pink rose-colored sunglasses.  That's what!

It isn't that I like to ignore reality, Friends, but I don't think it hurts to just make sure I'm able to see things in their best, rosiest light, whenever possible.  But when I need to see things in their natural light, the rosy lenses in my rose-colored glasses flip open to reveal the true nature of whatever it is I'm lookin' at, then I can decide whether to keep my rose-colored glasses on or off.  Nine times out of ten, I like to keep my lenses flipped open, but remember the lesson of the glasses, which is to stay on the sunny side of life.  That's what I do.  Altitude is determined by attitude, after all, Big People!

Anyways, I'm gonna go now.  I love ya lots, and I'll be seein' ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Those Plants are Dyno-MITE!

My favorite thing about dynamite plants are poppin' 'em!

Hiya, Friends!

Hey, have you ever heard of Dynamite Plants?  They're those plants that have the little orange flowers on 'em and the little pods that POP!!! when ya touch 'em? 

They're pretty much the bubble-wrap of the plant world, if ya ask me, and I think dynamite plants are just the greatest.

Some people call 'em weeds and get all up in arms when they see Little Kids poppin' those pods, because I guess that's where the seeds are, and when ya make 'em pop, it's spreadin' the seeds around, so's there'll be even more dynamite plants.  I don't see what's to get all up in arms over.  Dynamite plants are a whole lotta fun, and I think the little orange flowers are cheerful!

Friends, I think it's time we re-frame the way we look at weeds.  Insteadda seein' 'em as nuisance plants, think of 'em as ultra-hardy indigenous perennials that are free.  That oughtta be enough to change the ol' attitude toward the plants we think of as weeds.  That oughtta do the dang ol' trick, Big People!

Hey.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  I have a POPulation of dynamite plants to help out today.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Fast Times at St. Laffalotatus- Mercy-Mercy Hospital

I don't even know what time it is on which day!

Oh, boy, Friends, has it ever been a Night at St. Laffalotatus- Mercy-Mercy Hospital. 

I thought that with it bein' summertime, I'd have a lighter patient load.  I thought maybe there'd be less surgical Spirit Lifts and such, but as it turns out, I've been workin' DOUBLE!

I had to consult with the hospital's staff Humor Epidemiologist and near as we can figure, people are just all kindsa mad and snarly and down in the dumps because Summer's coming to an end, thus, an uptick in our Spirit Lifts.

Sure, it's good for business, but here at St. Laffalotatus- Mercy-Mercy Hospital, it's also our business to be good stewards of Public Humorous Health.  So here's a tip straight from your very own Physician of Humorous Healing, Dr. Zoe:

I know it's hard to see Summer coming to an end, but think of all the fun things Fall brings- new clothes, new shoes, crisp air, crunchy apples in-season, changing leaves, all our favorite television shows back with new seasons.  Fall's gonna be okay. 

But don't start ruinin' the last of the summer by worryin' about it, Friends.  Don't do that.  There's still lotsa hot days and fun to be hand, mmmkay? 

Hey.  I've gotta go on my rounds on my Spirit Lift Post-Ops.  There's lots of em'.  I'll see ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots.  Muah!

Make a Date

Sweet, delicious, and good for you:  Dates: Who knew?!

Hiya, Big People!  Happy Saturday to you! 

Well, if you know me, you know that I love tryin' new foods, especially foods that my own Big People seem to think a lot of.  I get the biggest kick out of tryin' new things.  I really do. 

It all goes back to my days of drinkin' my Similac and eyein' up all the delicious, chewable things my Big People would eat right in front of me as though I wasn't aware that they were eating deliciousness you can chew, and I was slurpin' baby formula.  Not that I'm complainin'.  Back in the day, Similac was where it was at.  Granted, that day was back before my eyes could focus and let me see food.

Then I got to try out pureed foods, and that was cool for a while, but I realized I still was gettin' a less than fair shake at mealtime.  I still wasn't able to chew anything.  I couldn't wait to start gummin' bananas. But I knew there was deliciousness to be had, beyond bananas and purees.  I really got so I was payin' attention to what my Big People were eating, and I realized it bore little to no resemblance to what passed for food for me.

Well, a while back, I noticed Mommy scarfin' down diced dates by the handful... nay, the BAGful!  And if Mommy's hoovering down a food like that, I knew it had to be good, so I tried 'em. And guess what!  I liked 'em a whole lot!  They're sweeter and less chewy than a raisin, and they don't have unfortunate side-effects that prunes... excuse me... dried plums... often have.  If there's no chocolate in the house for this kid to enjoy, and there rarely is, at least I know that dates are an excellent option. 

So don't be afraid to try new foods, Big People!  You might just find something that's your new favorite thing! 

Lollipops and Fridays Always Pick Me Up!

This is the opposite of a rainy day and Monday!

Hiya, Friends!

Well, ya know, bein' a Little Kid can be hard work.  I have my days that are ups, and my days that are downs.  I try not to let the down kinda days get me too far down, you know what I mean?

When the Grumblies rear their grumbly heads around me, I find ways to pick myself back up and even out the bumpies in the road. 

Fridays are a really good way to help put me in a good mood, but Fridays aren't available every day.  They're kind of a limited edition thing, when ya really think the heck about it.  So when a Friday isn't within arm's reach, I hafta go lookin' for lollipops. 

Lollipops never fail to make me happy, Friends.  Sometimes it takes me a couple-three lollipops to get to a hundred percent Zoe-branded exuberance when I've gotten down in the dumps, but lollipops never fail to make me happy eventually.

So I hope, Big People, that when you get the Grumblies, you're able to find something that picks you up, too.  I highly recommend lollipops.  They're great!

Hey.  I love ya lots!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

...But I Wanted the Swirly Bread!

I like the pumpernickel-rye swirly bread, and this is plain old wheat!  This is the worst day ever!

Well, hiya, Friends! 

You know, I'm not a difficult little person to get along with.  I'm really not.  It's just, I like what I like, and I am deeply disappointed when I don't get what I like.  I don't like havin' to settle for Something Else. 

Case in point, my favorite bread to eat is the swirly pumpernickel-rye kind.  I like the swirliness of the two different kinds of breads.  I like the strong flavors.  I am not shy about requesting that particular kind of bread, whenever bread is offered.

However, sometimes, I'm told the pumpernickel-rye swirly bread is not available, and I wind up settling for a less interesting kind of bread to eat- regular rye with seeds isn't bad.  Regular rye without seeds is also acceptable.  But on the darkest of the dark days, I hafta eat wheat bread or worse... white bread. 

Now, I understand I oughtta be thankful even to have bread, when there are so many in the world who do not have enough to eat.  And I am.  I'm grateful for living in the Land of Plenty, where I have the luxury of spazzing out when my preferred loafa bread is unavailable to me.

Actually, now that I think about it, Friends, maybe it isn't sucha big deal after all, havin' to eat a less-preferred flavor of bread.  You know, I think I'm gonna go realign my chakras.  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I love ya lots!  Be grateful for havin' the basics, mmmkay?  Muah!

Eatchyer Vegetables, Big People!

You mean there's people who don't like vegetables?!  That's crazy talk!

Hiya, Friends!  Well, ya know, if ya know me, you know I just love vegetables!  In fact, my favorite one that I request all the time is Salt and Vinegar Spinach!

I'm not sure what my favorite part is, whether it's the saltiness of the salt, or the tartness of the vinegar, or if it's just the spinachness of the spinach itself.

You know what I'm talkin' about!  When you eat the spinach, you feel it hit your belly, then go to all your muscles and make 'em big, like Popeye!  Or at least, that's how it FEELS spinach makes me feel.  Strong.  Powerful.  Like I could take Bluto the heck on so he wouldn't ever forget it!

That's why I like eating vegetables, Big People.  They make me feel healthy and strong.  I hope you like eating your vegetables, too.  They're so good for you, and you can make 'em taste great!  It's all about attitude!

Hey, Friends!  As you can see, I have a big bowla greens to eat up, so I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, mmmkay?  I love ya lots!  Muah!

What I Really Need Is a Jet-Pack

Friends, I'm savin' up for a jet-pack, I've decided.

Hiya, Big People! As you mayermaynot know, I spent a week at the Lake House recently, and we had a kayak, and a paddle-board, and a big float that we brought from home.  We had great food, and a whole lotta fun, and also root beer floats and dance parties almost every night.

I mean, we pretty much had everything we needed for a week of fun at the Lake House.

Almost.

We didn't have jet-packs, though, and that really diminished my enjoyment of the Lake.  And before ya look at me like "Zoe, there's no such things as jet-packs," I'll just stop ya right there and say "Yaw-haw, there is too!"

They hook up to a jet-ski, and somehow, water gets sucked up through a hose, it goes into the jet-pack, then squirts back out of the jet-pack in a glorious jet of water, hence the 'jet' in 'jet-pack,' and I guess the wearer can do all sortsa jet-packy things with the jet-pack.

 Friends, I have a birthday comin' up, and Christmas isn't too far behind.  I've decided I'm gonna start savin' up for a jet-pack right the heck right now.  It's so important to have goals in this life.  And my goal is to own a jet-pack of my very own.

Jet-pack.

Reunited with my Old Friend!

He says he'd recognize me anywhere!

Hiya, Friends!  You know what's more fun than a Barrel of Monkeys?  Well, I'll tell ya!

Ridin' on a tire-horsey!  You bet!

It's true.  After I visited the animals at Living Treasures, I got to visit my old friends the Tire-Horseys!

It's been a coupla years since I've been at Living Treasures, so I was worried that the Tire-Horseys wouldn't recognize me.  The Giraffes had to look twice, and when I said who I was, then they recognized me, but the Tire-Horseys knew who I was, right off the bat!

You know, I can't blame my Giraffe Friends, or even the Tire-Horseys, if they didn't recognize me right away.  I was pretty mucha BABY the last time I was at their place, and I like to think I've changed a LOT since then. 

It sure was nice to see 'em again, though, and those Tire-Horseys are just as much fun as I remember 'em bein'!

So I hope you get to meet up with a long-lost Friend sometime, too, Friends, and if they don't recognize ya right away, don't let it hurt your feelings.  Just smile and say who you are, and then you can ketchup with the best of 'em!  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Sven's Cousin's Friend's College Roommate's Next Door Neighbor!

Reindeers are better than people, Sven's cousin's friend's college roommate's next door neighbor, don't you think that's true?

Hiya, Friends!

Didja know I love the movie Frozen?  Well, it's true.  I became a Frozen fan last year, about this time, and I'm still going strong.  I notice something new, every time I see that movie! 

Imagine the thrill I get, whenever I get to meet someone from the Frozen movie, Big People!  I mean, it's Spot from Target-level excitement, actually.

While I was visiting Living Treasures in Moraine, Pennsylvania, I had the opportunity to meet and buy snacks for a reindeer who is Sven from Frozen's cousin's friend's college roommate's next door neighbor!  How about that?!  He was even a grip on the set of Frozen!  

And I got to buy him carrots!

I'm still over the moon about meeting Sven's cousin's friend's college roommate's next door neighbor, Friends.  You bet I am!  It doesn't get much higher on the Celeb-o-meter than that!

The Right Paira Shoes!

I earned these great shoes, Babies!

Friends, a very smart girl named Cinderella once said that "The Right Pair Of Shoes Can Change Your Life," and I couldn't agree more. 

During a recent trip to Target, I came into contact with the BEST SHOES EVER!!!  They're a pair of glass slippers, and here's the story behind 'em!

Mommy was in the shoes at Target, lookin' for sandals for me to wear this summer.  Boooooooooring!

And then.  I saw 'em.  The most beautiful paira shoes I've ever seen in my LIFE!  They were a real-life replica imitation glass pair of Cinderella's Glass Slippers.  In today's world, no shoe company would want the liability of makin' real glass slippers for Little Kid feet to wear, so I assure you that these imitation glass slippers are perfectly safe for me to wear!

I picked 'em up and tried 'em on my feet, and lo and behold, THEY FIT!!!  I showed 'em to Mommy, and she scrunched up her face and said 'honey, those are jelly shoes, and they'll give ya blisters.'

I cannot count the number of shakes I do not give about 'blisters.'  I wanted these shoes.  So when she told me to take 'em off and put 'em back on the shelf, I scrunched up MY face!

Then I saw a lady in a red polo shirt, re-stocking the shoe department's shelves.  I went right up to that lady, patted her on the hand, and said, "Excuse me, but I'd like to buy those glass slippers!"

"I have a pair in my cart for her," Mommy said to the lady, who looked quite surprised, I hafta say.  I'd think she'd run into power struggles such as this a lot, between Little Kids and their tyrannical Mommies.

So the lady nodded, and Mommy and I gathered up Aunt Colleen and Gramma and we left the shoes!  I thought for sure Mommy was tellin' the Target Lady stories.  I never thought for a minute that she really did put a pair of those glass slippers in our cart.  And was I ever MAD at Mommy! 

I was about ready to hunt down my friend Spot the Dog to come BITE MOMMY'S BUTT for bein' so mean, and for tellin' sucha lie to the Target Lady.  But then we got to the checkout, and there they were: MY GLASS SLIPPERS THAT FIT ME LIKE THEY WERE MADE JUST FOR ME!

I've gotta say, even though I DO get blisters from my glass slippers, if I wear 'em without socks, I LOVE those shoes.  They make me feel so fancy and sophisticated.  They go great with my Cinderella dress, as well as with my casual wear. 

Cinderella was right: the right paira shoes can change the heck right outta your life!

My Destiny Today!

I always knew I belong in a castle on a stage under a mirror-ball, Big People!

Hiya, Friends! 

Well, ya know, my recent trip to the Children's Museum of Pittsburgh really made a Big Impression on me.  It sure as all get-out did!

One of my favorite things about the Children's Museum is that they have a real-life, working stage with a giant replica of King Friday's Castle and a trunka dress-up clothes.  The last time I was at the Children's Museum, the stage and castle were a ZOO, but this time, I had the place all to myself.

I gotta tell ya, Friends, I loved it all.  I loved the costumes.  I loved the velvet curtains and the lights and the theatre seats.  I loved acting under the mirror-ball.

Overall, it was just about one of the most exciting experiences of my whole entire life so far!

I hope you find your destiny today, Friends!  It's a great feeling to discover what it is that you're supposed to do!  I love ya lots!  See ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Eric Carle's World!

Walkin' through giant grass really gives a kid perspective, you know, Friends?!

Hiya, Friends!

Hey, on my recent visit to the Children's Museum of Pittsburgh, I had the opportunity to experience some of my FAVORITE books from the inside-out.  Until September, CMP has a special exhibit called "The World of Eric Carle," the creator of the Very Hungry Caterpillar, the Very Busy Spider, and other masterworks marrying words with the paper arts.

It was so much fun, visiting the World of Eric Carle.  I got to make like the Very Busy Spider, and weave a web.  I got to find my light with the Very Lonely Firefly.  I met the Click Beetle and I walked through the grass like he does.  I composed a symphony with the Very Quiet Cricket.  It ALL was my favorite thing, Friends!

What I love about Eric Carle is that his world has so much texture in it.  Everything is so colorful and exciting. 

I hope you have a setta books that you love as much as I love the Books of Eric Carle, Friends.  Reading is fundamental and fun!

I love ya lots, Big People!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

Meeting a Big Urban Giraffe!

Not all my giraffe friends are Little Giraffes, Friends!

Hiya, Friends!

As you know, I'm an advocate for Little Giraffes of the Wild Steppes everywhere, and you know that I frequently travel around to meet such Little Giraffes, to talk to them about how I can help their plight.  But didja know that I also go around, meeting Big Giraffes, too?

It's true. 

My friend Wheels, here, is the Big Urban Giraffe that stands guard outside the Children's Museum of Pittsburgh!  I think Wheels is just glorious!

As far as Big Urban Giraffes go, Wheels is pretty hearty.  The people at the Children's Museum take good care of her, and she's strong enough to withstand Pittsburgh in all its four seasons. 

Wheels gets to meet lotsa people every day, and that makes her very interesting.  She collects stories and will share those stories with anyone who asks.  I asked, and it sure was worth the conversation!

So wherever ya go, and whatever ya do, Big People, always be on the lookout for Big Urban Giraffes, and strike up a conversation!  You'll be glad ya did!  I love ya lots!  See ya tomorrow! Muah!

See Spot Shop!

I'm so star-struck right now!

Friends, if ya know me, ya know that I am a shopper.  It's in my DNA.  I follow all the shoppin's.  I like the little blue light bulb at Kmart, I thrill at a trip to the Mall, and Target really hits the ol' spot.

Speakin' of spots, I recently got to meet Spot, who is the mascot of Target.  And I was star-struck. 

Well, ya know, I love dogs to begin with.  Spot the Target Dog kinda reminds me of my own pal Rozzie, except Rozzie's a White German Shepherd, and she doesn't have a red target over her left eye.  Or her right eye, for that matter.  But she's a friendly white dog, and so is Spot.

Spot the Dog helps Target shoppers find the best deals on what they'd like to buy, and that's pretty great in my book!  I love a good deal!

But mostly, I love to meet new friends, and Spot the Dog is DEFINITELY a friend, Friends.  So if you're ever in the dang ol' Target, and you see Spot the Dog, saunter on over to him and say "Hiya, Spot! I'm a pal of Zoe's, so I'm a pal of yours, too!" and see the wonderful conversation that pooch has in store for ya!  You won't regret it!  I promise!

I love ya lots, Friends!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!

The Kids' Menu

Can't I just have a bowl of spinach with salt and vinegar and some grapes?

Well, hiya, Friends!  Happy Monday to you! 

Well, ya know, I'm a kid who likes the finer things in life, and one of the finer things in this life as far as I'm concerned is eatin' meals in restaurants.  One phenomenon I've discovered in these restaurants is the Kids' Menu.

Oh, goodness, Friends, Kids' Menus are pretty much the same, wherever ya go, whether you're at Red Robin, Outback Steakhouse, Club 57, the Diner Down the Street... Restaurants can be as diverse as diverse can be, but it's always the same things on their menus for children.

Well, yeah, I'm right.  Basically, everywhere you go, you'll find a hamburger/cheeseburger, chicken fingers or chicken nuggets, grilled cheese, and Mac and Cheese.  To pander to 'balanced meal' loving Moms and Dads, the menu includes half-hearted attempts at vegetable offerings for kids- French fries, mixed vegetables, small side-salad (if you're lucky), mandarin oranges, apple slices, grapes, or if you're really, really lucky, broccoli or a fresh fruit cup.

Practically without fail, I order the Mac and Cheese, chocolate milk, and fruit of some sort.  I snub the Mac and Cheese, eat all the fruit and drink all the milk.  The other day, Daddy told me he was gonna stop ordering me entrees from the Kids' Menu and just get me the fruit side and the chocolate milk, and I was all like, "why are you sayin' it like that's a threat, because that's all I've ever wanted!"

Yes!  Bring on the fruit!  Order me just the fruit!  Add in a side of broccoli, if it isn't too much to ask.  Always chocolate milk, unless they don't have it, and then I'd like juice of some sort if it's winter, or strawberry lemonade if it's summer, glorious summer.  If we're in an establishment with a salad bar with pickled eggs on it, PLEASE order the salad bar for yourself and bring me back a pickled egg!  I beg you!  I love those things!

But the thing I'd really like to see is salt and vinegar spinach, much like Mommy makes for me.  That's a thing on the Kids' Menu that I just think would be so cool. 

Anyways, Friends, I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  I love ya lots!  Muah!

Recharge and Renew

I'm runnin' outta steam a little bit, Friends!

Hiya, Friends.  No, I'm not in a bad mood.  Not at all.  I've just been havin' a lot of fun lately, and I'm finding my batteries are kinda runnin' low.

Do you ever get that feeling where you're just plum tuckered out? 

When the dang ol' iPad gets to feelin' run-down, all's I hafta do is plug that thing into a USB Charging Hub, and it'll be all good to go, but I'm a Little Kid.  We can't be plugged in or plugged out, usually- if we could, I betchya a lot more of us would have a lot less troubles sleepin' through the night or for naps. You know, if we can't sleep, we'd just plug ourselves out, or if we needed to recharge, we could just plug ourselves in.

I'm gonna go get some rest, Big People.  Hopefully come back all refreshed and recharged and renewed for tomorrow.   Nobody likes a low-energy Toddler!

I sure love ya lots, though, Friends.  I'll be seein' ya tomorrow.  Muah!

Grown-Up Ice Cream Flavors!

Friends, this is happiness in a chocolate sprinkled waffle cone, right here!

Well, hi there, Friends!

Another thing I really love about Summertime is that it's perfectly acceptable to get an ice cream cone from the place at the mall and sit there at a pink table, eatin' that ice cream cone like a boss.

You're right.  It's perfectly acceptable to do that during the other times of the year, too.  That's what makes the Mall pretty great in my book.

Anyways, I got to pick any flavor I wanted to.  Mommy lifted me up so I could see the kids' flavors, and they were pretty- they looked like giant tubs of Play-Doh, with all their bright colors, and their crazy flavor combinations, when applicable.  But my eyes were drawn right to the Black Cherry ice cream.  You know, over in the dang ol' grown-ups section of the ice cream flavors.  Just because I'm a kid doesn't mean that I'm gonna be impressed by bright colors and novel flavor combinations, Friends.

Of course, I picked a waffle cone dipped in chocolate and rainbow sprinkles, though.  I mean, just because I have sophisticated tastes in ice cream flavors doesn't mean I don't like to have a little fun, too!

Bein' myself.  That's what I'm talkin' about, Friends.  You be yourself, too!  It's a lot of fun, not to hafta wanna try so hard bein' someone else!