Toyota: A Massive Disappoint, and Not Because of the Reason You'd Think!

I thought Toyota was a toy store.  An actual toy store.

Friends, the other day on The Daily Zoe Facebook Picture Show, I learned an unfortunate thing about Toyota.

You see, previous to that Fateful Day, I was under the impression that Toyota was a great big toy store.  Well, it only makes sense.  'Toyota' has the very word TOY right in the front of it.  But they don't really sell toys at Toyota.  No.  They sell cars-n-trucks.

Big People, I know what you're gonna say.  You're gonna say that to you, cars-n-trucks ARE toys.  Upon that, I call 'hogwash.'  Big cars-n-trucks are too big for Little Kids like me to be able to use.  We can drive scaled down TOY vehicles, but the big ones that are purveyed by Toyota, we're too little to drive 'em.  The only thing we Little Kids can hope for from Toyota is to ride in one, which at best, is passive entertainment.

We like to have our hands on the steering wheel, Big People!  Little Kids are more capable than you think!

As for you Big People callin' cars-n-trucks YOUR toys, you're adults.  Call cars-n-trucks Cars-N-Trucks, but don't call 'em toys.  They are not toys.  They go fast.  They're big.  They're heavy.  And if you're not careful, they can be dangerous.  I'm just sayin' call cars-n-trucks what they ARE!  You Big People take fiber supplements, watch the Evening News, and make the tough decisions at the grocery store.  You don't need to be callin' cars-n-trucks 'toys' when we all know they aren't.  Because when you do, you raise expectations of us Little Kids.  We think we're goin' somewheres fun, and as it turns out, we're just goin' in the dang ol' Family Bus.  Which might be a Toyota-brand vehicle or it might not.

Anyways, Friends, I was really disappointed to find out that Toyota isn't an actual toy store that sells stuff for Little Kids to play with.  But I love ya just the same, all right?  I'll see ya tomorrow!  Muah!