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| ...Or maybe it's 'toytarian,' on accounta I wanna save the toys! |
You know what? Yesterday was a beautiful day in the Bing. And do you know Mommy still didn't even take me to the dang ol' Kmart over in Wellsville so I could visit the toys?!
I'll tell ya what, Friends, taking me to Kmart to visit the toys might seem like it's all for my benefit, but the truth of the matter is that it's really for makin' the lives of the toys in the toy department at Kmart better, more enriched.
Just imagine how nice it must be for those toys, sittin' there in that harsh fluorescent light, then seein' me come down the aisle to make their day brighter. I say 'hiya!' to all of 'em. I talk to the baby toys, and the Legos and the Barbies and the action figures and the cars-n-trucks.
There is no toy with too old or too young an age advisory for me to talk to. I really love 'em all. And all the toys love me.
So you see, Big People, my wanting to go to the toy department at Kmart is really a humanitarian mission. A toymanitarian mission, if you will.
It's what I'm all about, Big People! Hey. I'll see ya tomorrow! I love ya lots! Muah!
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