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Saturday, October 20, 2012

Accessories Aren't My Friends

I think a smile is the only accessory I need!
Well, Friends, I've just about gotten to my wits' end with Mommy.  We went for a walk the other day, to get the mail and to walk up and down the driveways, since it was such a nice afternoon and all, and it would have been great, except Mommy made me wear that hot pink hipster hat that we already know I don't like to wear.  I like to look at my hipster hat, and play with it like it's a toy, but it really makes me mad to have to wear my hipster hat.

It wasn't just the hipster hat, though.  Mommy tried on all three pairs of my sunglasses on me, trying to get me to keep a pair on my face. She says it's bad for my eyes to go out in the daylight without sunglasses on, and that squinting will make me get wrinkles, but I think she's nuts.  Just because she likes to wear sunglasses from the minute the sun hints at coming up, until it's so dark out that you can't see your hand in front of your face, doesn't mean she knows everything about everything, now, does it?
I'm smiling because I'm not wearing sunglasses.


But other than all the flap about me and my hat and sunglasses, it was a nice walk.  A little windy.  Don't tell Mommy, but I was kind of glad I had my windbreaker blanket on the stroller.  I stayed cozy-warm inside, and the wind stayed off me.  And having the blanket on my stroller made it so I didn't have to wear socks or shoes, which everybody knows I hate.  My feet stayed nice and warm, thanks to my blanket.  And I had my snack-cup full of puffs and yogurt drops.  I tossed out a couple puffs for any birds that would like some, but I kept my yogurt drops for myself.  I really like those the best!

Back to the breeze, though.  It was such a nice breeze that I didn't like to have my hair all covered up with my hipster hat.  I kept taking it off, so I could feel the wind in my hair, and that Mommy kept putting it back on me.  In what can be construed only as an act of aggression, she flipped the roof of my stroller down so it was like an opaque red windshield, to keep the breeze out of my hair!  How rude was that, Friends?  I'll tell you how rude.  Very rude is the answer.
Stroller roofs aren't meant to be wind screens!

I mean, I thought we were on a walk to see the sights of the yard, and here Mommy was, constantly fiddling with the hipster hat I didn't want to wear, and then flipping down my stroller roof, making an unwanted wall around me, so I couldn't even see where we were going anyway.  I'd thought about tossing my hat overboard, or maybe chucking out my sunglasses, but figured that'd just be making more troubles for myself.

Much as it irked me, having the hat put back on my head so many times after I worked so hard to take it off without making my hair unintentionally wild, I had to stop and remember to be glad that at least I get to ride facing forward in my stroller.  There was a day when I had to ride in my carseat snapped into my stroller, so it was like a baby carriage!  Talk about not having any dignity!  Everybody looked at me like I was a baby, and I couldn't even use the cupholders on my own stroller, since I was strapped into that carseat contraption.  Now, at least I get to ride in the stroller like a big girl.  I can take in the sights, so long as my roof isn't flopped down in my way.  I'm taken more seriously by my peers.

Eventually I'll train Mommy to keep the hipster hat off my head and the sunglasses of any kind off my face.  We'll work a little bit on it, every day.  But winter's on its way, and it has me worried.  I guess I have a winter hat that ties right around my chin.  That's going to make taking it off bothersome.  But maybe I'll get a hold of that hat before it gets really cold, and figure out myself how to get the hat back off my head.  I could practice!

Anyway, Big People, I hope you can get out and walk today, and not have to wear a hipster hat or sunglasses if you don't want to wear them!  Have fun and remember Zoe loves you!  Muah!

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