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| I'm not a kid- I'm a reindeer! |
Well, ya know, I'm embroiled in this Thing with the Elves on Shelves. I don't even have a spy-elf in my house, but somehow, they keep submitting Naughty Reports to Santa Claus about me, clogging up his workflow, right here during his busy season.
While my plan to distract the Elves on Shelves with little elf cars is working slowly but surely, it's working slowly, like I said. And Santa Claus is still kinda less than jolly about the whole thing.
That's why today, insteadda me bein' me, I'm masquerading as a reindeer. An eight-pointer. I'm going to avoid the woods, because it's still huntin' season here, but so far, my disguise is helping me evade the eyes of the dastardly spy-elves. The only thing I see foiling my plan is that my arms are gonna get tired, holding my hands up like antlers. Other than that, this plan of mine is watertight.
You know, Friends, sometimes, the goodness of my ideas scares even me. Some of the things I come up with are quite brilliant. Don't worry. I'm not gonna get that bigga head about it. I'll stay humble. I just wanna acknowledge that I am full of really, really, ridiculously good ideas.
Hey. I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, mmmkay? I love the daylights right outta ya! Be good! If the spy-elves aren't watchin' me, you bet they're probably lookin' atchyoo! Muah!
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