Throw Them Bows

Oh. For. Pete's. Sake. Another stupid hair bow?!

Hiya, Big People!  How was your Fourth of July?  I'd like to say that I have a follow-up to yesterday's super-factual history lesson, but unfortunately something else is on my mind, and that something else is bows.  Literally.  Mommy's been putting hairbows in my hair every darn day for the last coupla weeks, and I've gotta say I'm sort of fed up.

By "sort of fed up," I mean I'm completely over the bows.  I'm ready to throw them bows. 

Now, before you think I'm so hostile about bows, let me list a number of bows about which I harbor no hostility. Actually, bows that I quite love.

Rainbows, first of all.  I just love 'em.  I love all the colors.  I love the way they shimmer in the sky.  I have a little projector for my bedroom that shines a little rainbow right on my wall, just for me, and I have a little book that's made of cardboard that has all the colors of the rainbow except purple.  That makes me kinda sad, but I won't hold it against the little book.  I enjoy looking at all the colors. 

Don't you dare make me wear a bow!

You know another kind of bow I like?  I like my elbows.  They make my arms bendy.  They help me be able to drink out of my sippy cup.  They help me feed myself.  And I think somehow, my clothing wouldn't look as cute if my arms couldn't bend.  So elbows are a winner in my book!

I like pasta bows, because they can make macaroni and cheese, and that's one of my favorite things to eat.  Actually, I pretty much love pasta.  One day it can be mac-and-cheese, the next day it can be a nice, refreshing summer salad.  And.  Pasta bows make pretty jewelry if ya string it on strings or elastics!  And don't even get me started on if ya use some paint or food-color on it!

Bows that come on presents.  They're pretty great bows.  They're all tied up, and they hold a fun secret.  Something all wrapped up in pretty paper and a box, and it all has your name on it, and it's tied with a bow.  Any bow that holds a present is pretty great.

Hiya, Friends! Take a tip from Zoe and stay bow-free!

But hair-bows.  Oh, they're insidious beasts.  On the one hand, I can't completely hate 'em, because they keep my hair outta my face and keep Mommy from letting anybody chop my hair off in a pixie-cut.  And they're pretty, all by themselves.  I don't mind wearin' bows in my hair sometimes, but now Mommy thinks it has to be an every-day styling strategy.  After a coupla days wearin' my hair up in a bow, it starts forgetting which way it's s'posed ta grow, and when it forgets that, it gets irritable, and its roots hurt.  I don't like that!  Also, sometimes, bows pull my hair.  Other times, they're just so pretty, I wanna look at 'em with my hands, and I can't see 'em when they're in my hair, so I try to take 'em out myself, to inspect 'em, and I end up pulling my own hair!  It's hard to know who to be mad at in that situation!

Here's what all this boils down to: Take a tip from Zoe and stay bow-free, especially if we're talkin' about MY hair.  Because at the rate I've been going these last coupla weeks, I'm about ready to throw them bows... right out!

Not you, though, Friends.  Never!  I love ya!  Muah!