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| I wasn't joking. Pumpkin Spice can be kinda basic. |
Well, ya know, not everybody appreciated what I had to say about Pumpkin Spice being the Spice Girl that 2015 Deserves the other day. Boy, howdy, was it not appreciated by everybody.
If I were a celebrity, I'd explain this away by saying that my words were taken out of context and that I was just joking when I inferred that Pumpkin Spice Everything, Yoga Pants, Ugg Boots, Infinity Scarves, and Long-sleeved White Fitted Tunic-Tops are basic. I could say I was just joking and that everything was taken out of context, but I wasn't. Heck, I didn't even infer that those things are basic. I'm pretty sure I came right out and said it out loud.
Apparently, I struck a nerve with some people who are devoted to all those things, which makes me really glad I didn't add in NorthFace vests to my list of basic things that Pumpkin Spice: The Spice Girl 2015 Deserves would accessorize herself with, because in addition to the Pumpkin Spice Everything people and the yoga pant people and the people who looooooove Ugg boots, and the people who aren't seen without an infinity scarf, EVER, and the people who would buy stock in long-sleeved white fitted tunic tops if they were stock-buying people are rabid enough without getting NorthFace all up in my face, too.
Dear me, Friends. You know, I was going for a laugh, and I was using my humor to hold a mirror up to Us in 2015. If the reflection seemed a little basic, I was only letting the mirror give back what we've given it. Sometimes, real mirrors tell us stuff we don't wanna know, like that we really did have spinach between our front teeth the whole time we were talking to that person we try so hard to impress.
Here's the thing, Friends, for the record, I have nothing against the things I said were basic. I think there's a time and place for yoga pants. I've heard tell that UGG boots are really warm. I'm a giant fan of the tunic. I enjoy pumpkin spice in things... not in everything, but in some things. I own some infinity scarves myself, and I wouldn't be without 'em in the bone-chilling dead of winter. NorthFace, I haven't gotten into yet, but I have a nicey warm Carter's coat I'll be wearin' for my third winter in a row, so maybe someday, I'll invest in a NorthFace coat. I don't know.
I think the thing that makes me make fun of those things is their ubiquity. And a lot of times, they're ubiquitously together. If you don't think that makes 'em a little basic, you're fooling yourself. And it's okay that they're basic. It's also okay to swap out some of those things for something else, once in a while. Why would you want yourself to announce that you're #basicSquadGoals every day of your life? There's only one you! It's okay to be individual!
And for the Authentic hashtag lobby that I apparently alienated, I'm sorry, but #Authentic is overused so much that if I took a swigga my Pumpkin Spice Bambinoccino EVERY TIME someone mentions #Authentic, or is living #Authentic, or is authentically #Authentic, I'd be #authentically floating right the heck off my #authentic high-horse, Friends.
It's okay to laugh at ourselves, People. We're a ridiculous bunch, when ya get right down to it. I just want us all to take our ridiculosity just a little less seriously. That's all I'm out to accomplish with my Pumpkin Spice: The Spice Girl 2015 Deserves project. That's all!
I love ya just the same, Friends! I'll be back tomorrow! Muah!
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