 |
| Good-bye, TPS Reports! Hello, Donut Development! |
Hey, remember that big flap I was in, over April Fool's Day, and remember how I was still talkin' about it yesterday, on accounta how I was dragged into Human Resources?
Well, even though I still regretted nothing about my actions on April Fool's Day, I decided that if my company didn't have my back when I needed someone to stand up for me on April Fool's Day, I didn't need to be sittin' in a department, fillin' out TPS Reports for them. So do you know what I did?
If you guessed that I found a vulnerability in the building's public address system and played "Take This Job and Shove It" by Johnny Paycheck and then announced "Zoe out!" over the microphone, then you'd be oddly specific and correct in your guess.
Because that's just what I did.
I quit.
Who says this kid doesn't have a great sense of humor and maybe a bit of a criminal streak. I prefer to think of it as an opportunistic side- I mean, if the Company didn't want its security vulnerabilities exploited, they hadn't ought to have such vulnerabilities- amIright?
Anyway, this is not a sad end to my tale, Friends. I'm still gonna be here, every day. I'm still gonna be doing my picture show over on the Facebook. The only different thing is that I've filled out my last TPS Report for the Company. In fact, my whole entire department has filled out their last TPS Reports.
After I quit, I went down to Donut Dude's and sat there at his counter, tellin' him what I did, and I was tryin' to keep myself all psyched up, because by the time I got to Donut Dude's, I kinda thought what I'd done was pretty darned crazy.
Well, it was, when you really think about it, isn't it? That whole thing with the PA system? My haters might have a point about the whole criminal mastermind component to my personality...
But my friend Donut Dude listened to me, and brought me donuts, and offered me a job at his place. At first I said I didn't wanna run the drive-thru window again, because that was really crazy-busy the day I helped him out, and I was really stressed out! As it turns out, though, Donut Dude is a much bigger deal than I thought he was. He has lotsa Donut Dude stores. There's his DonutMobile donut trucks. Donuts on Demand service for events.
And to think I thought Donut Dude lived under a bridge, or maybe in the backa his store on the corner.
Anyways, Donut Dude said what he had in mind for me was far beyond the drive-thru window, and that was really terrifying, BUT. I am now the Director of Donut Development at Donut Dude's, and he let me go hire a buncha my friends from my old department at the Company to come work in my Donut Development Department! How about that?! So I went and
Take that, Company!
So in a way, I've come kinda full-circle while I've come a long ways from when I got my start, fetching donuts for my department, three years ago. Donut Dude has come a long ways, too. He'd run out of donuts that day, but he has never run out of donuts since.
I'm excited about my Future, Friends. I'm excited to get to go to work at a place that's fun. I really respect and like Donut Dude. He said my criminal mastermind tendencies are really a manifestation of my under-used and under-appreciated creativity, and it's mis-firing. But working with him, I'll be able to channel that creativity and that energy, and not waste a minute filling out reports that nobody knows what they're for.
Well, that's my day. I'd better skedaddle. I have a meeting with my new department. Donut Dude has set us up with a brand new giant Post-It pad and an easel, so we can brain-storm. We're all so excited. I know this is a really good move.
Plus, since Donut Dude's headquarters is in the building right across the street from the Company, Sabretooth has already gone to the windows facing our old work and given 'em the moon. Who the heck even knew Donut Dude had a headquarters building?! This is sucha crazy day!
I'll be seein' ya tomorrow, Friends! I love ya lots! Muah!
No comments:
Post a Comment