|Put your hands up in the air for clearance Valentine candy, Big People!|
Well, it's Wednesday! More important than that, it's the Day After a Major Candy-Givin' Holiday, and that means that stores from Walmart to Walgreens are offering deep discounts on their Valentine candies in fancy red boxes.
I think that Valentine candy bought for upwards of fifty, sixty, seventy percent off is more delicious than that very same candy purchased prior to Valentine's Day for full price.
Because it's the same candy. Nothing about the candy hearts changes chemically at 12:01 AM on February Fifteenth. The chocolate doesn't get all soapy. The red, pink, and white decorations don't fade. The centers don't get all grainy, and if they do, that was bad candy to begin with, and you do NOT want it! Conversation hearts don't get any less talkative.
I know that there are some people who get all hung up on Valentinin' on the very day of Valentine's Day, but I'm a kid who likes to stretch out my holidays and get the most bang for Mommy and Daddy's buck. I could have ONE boxa candies yesterday, but today, for the same price, I can haul home two or three.
And probably pick up an early Cadbury Creme Egg while I'm at it.
It's all about bein' flexible Friends! Soon's I learned that, I became a LOT happier in this life!
I love ya lots! Maybe I'll see ya at a candy-clearance sale today. If ya see a driverless shopping cart barreling down the aisle toward you, it's probably me. Say hey and point me in the direction of the cheap Valentine's Day goods!
I love ya lots, Big People! I'll see ya tomorrow! Muah!